Friday, March 16, 2012

Love You, Shore House!

The finale of Jersey Shore aired last night, and it was a little bittersweet for me. Even if the show comes back next season, it won't be the same. I hope they just do the spinoffs and let this be the end. The reunion, by the way, airs next Thursday. Can't wait.

Wah!

Snooki: You were the last one out of the house, which is fitting, since you're the big star of the show. We all know this. I loved when you said you could go back to the shore house forever. Now that you're pregnant and engaged, that's probably no longer the case, but your heart and soul came through on this show. And I'll defend Snooki right here, right now. She came on this show as a fun loving party girl who just wanted to fall in love, she was real with us and showed us what partying on the shore is, and she was genuine about who she was. The girl was just being honest. And funny! Girl has an awesome sense of humor. I just hate it when people hate on her when you know they've knocked back a few too many shots in their day, too. Snooks is all grown up now, and I wish her the best, and appreciate the many laughs she's given me on Jersey Shore. But, back to the finale. Nicole and Mike are getting along again (?) and he tells her a secret about Deena's sister. Ugh. Snooki was right to tell Mike not to talk about it and she was right to tell Deena. If someone were talking about my sister that way, I would want to know. Snooki's a good friend. Ok, ok enough Snooki love for one season, I'm sorry. Snooki's grade for the week: A.

Deena: You were kind to let the whole thing go with Mike and your sister. I would have punched his lights out. Seriously. I loved how committed you were to the water balloon fight. OMG! That looked like so much fun. You guys really went at it. I'm gonna defend you too right now. I love that you're just yourself all the time, no apologies, no excuses. I appreciate that you're pretty much a happy person all the time. And you're funny as well! I can't stress how much I love a girl with a sense of humor. I love anyone with a sense of humor, really. I hope you get your own show, maybe a Bethenny-esque type show where you balance your new relationship with your businesses? Just a thought. Merp! Deena's grade for the week: A.

JWOWW: I thought it was so funny that you weren't pissed off about the prank. You're the same girl who clocked Mike in the face without any hesitation. Well, wouldn't we all? Anyway, I think you've mellowed out a lot over the course of the show's run, and it's nice to see you just happy. You and Roger are so adorable together. I can't wait to see the spinoff with you and Snooks. I think it's going to be funny. Probably not a wild and crazy time now that you're both in stable relationships, but I can watch a best friend show like nobody's business. When you get two friends together, it's always a good time. JWOWW's grade for the week: A.

Sammi: Your speech at dinner was so nice! I love that you had one awesome summer and you weren't fighting the whole time. We know you're still the diva, but you've come around to where you're a fun diva. Like Gloria Estefan. It was bittersweet to see you leave with Ron, knowing you two ultimately couldn't work it out. But, at least you're still friends according to Ron on the Hook Up. I appreciated your cool new attitude. I can see you modeling and doing something with fashion and beauty. I would love to see you become a true fashionista. Sammi's grade for the week: A.

Vinny: Ugh. I swear, you have the weirdest taste in women. I get there's a certain fantasy checklist and you got to knock one off your list with your little stunt on this episode, but it was just ... blah. At this point, I wish you would have shed more light on overcoming your anxiety, or at least managing it, and your decision not to drink. That's what would have been interesting. Not trying to hook up with random girls all the time. That's not what cured your anxiety, my friend. Vinny's grade for the week: C.

Pauly: You have so much fun in this house, it's hard to be mad at you. But if you screamed at me to wake up every day, you'd be a dead man. Can't wait to see your spinoff! Pauly's grade for the week: B.

Ronnie: Thank you for being so much fun this season. The one liners, the looks, the laughs. It was all good. Good luck with the Ron Ron Juice business, buddy. And I'm glad you and Sam are still friends. Ronnie's grade for the week: A.

Mike: You had to stir the pot one last time. Ok. Lucky for you, it didn't blow up in your face. I can't wait to see you get blasted at the reunion. Maybe it'll be the wake up call you need to finally drop the act and just be a normal person. The fact that you threw a fit about your stuff being put outside (how old are you?!) just shows you're a child in a man's freakishly fit body. Grow up. Mike's grade for the week: F.

What did you think of the finale? Tweet me!