Watch What Happens Live - Jill Zarin's Pity Party Tour

First, I just want to say that my Real Housewives of New York Reunion Part 2 blog is coming soon! I need to actually watch it again, because the first time I watched, I was distracted. So, I need to watch it again and take notes because I realize that I owe you kids the best of the best of me. I wouldn't give you a half-assed blog unless there was some really good reason behind it. But I won't do that with RHONY, I won't do that to you.

Now, let's get into Jill Zarin's appearance on Watch What Happens Live. This was a mess. I am so glad Andy Cohen gave Jill Zarin 22 minutes to remind us why she's not on RHONY anymore. Let's break this down, shall we?

1. Jill thinks she was the voice of reason (when she said Heather was her replacement). Um, no, Jill. You were the pushy, but funny, crazy person who had a beef with almost everyone all the time. Every episode of every single season, you were either lecturing someone, arguing with someone, bashing someone, or ignoring someone. You were NEVER the voice of reason. You were the voice of unreason.

2. Jill believes Andy sided with Bethenny. Um, duh! We all did! (With the exception of Jill's fans, of course.) But seriously, it was a landslide in favor of Bethenny, because Jill was horrible to her. And here's the kicker! Jill admits she thought it would be great for the show! She sat there and told Andy that she thought they would fight and eventually make up on the show and it would be great for ratings. And you wonder why Bethenny wants nothing to do with you, Jill??? What kind of psycho does that? Even Jill admitted that Andy told her it was a bad idea to fight with Bethenny for ratings, and according to Jill, she immediately tried to make up with Bethenny, but by then it was too late. That's what we call karma, Jill. You should have made up with Bethenny because you really wanted to, not because, in your mind, it would be good for television.

3. Jill says Heather was brought on the show to replace her, but she can't replace her because she hasn't converted to Judaism. Wow. I'm just gonna let that sink in. Heather is NOTHING like Jill. Heather actually became MORE likable as the season went on. Enough said.

4. Jill doesn't understand why she was fired. Big surprise. Here's why you were fired, Jill. You became a fame-crazed maniac. You sabotaged your friendships to secure your place on a reality show and it came across as desperate and fake. The majority of the viewers were not on your side, and they made their voices heard. Bravo realized you were a liability, and that's why you were not asked to come back to the show.

5. Jill says the worst part of being fired was that she never got to say goodbye. Well, neither did DeShawn Snow, Lisa Wu Hartwell, Sheree Whitfield, Kelly Bensimon, Alex McCord, Cindy Barshop, Danielle Staub, and a slew of other ladies that weren't asked back on the show. This isn't All My Children. You don't get an exit storyline. You're off the show, and that's that. It's pretty presumptuous of you to want to say goodbye when none of these other ladies got that opportunity, either.

6. Jill wants to be friends with Bethenny again. Never gonna happen. Next.

7. Jill says she doesn't pay for Twitter followers. And that she didn't even know you could do that. Um, I'm not on a national television show and I even know that you can buy followers. Please.

All in all, it was disturbing to watch this woman whine about something that happened a year ago. And was I the only one who noticed she was drinking from a Jill Zarin wineglass? I mean, seriously, Jill, if your shapewear/clothing/bedding/jewelry line is doing so great, why in the world do you have to sell yourself SO HARD? You're coming on too strong! But that's the Jill Zarin way, isn't it?

You're determined and strong-willed and that's why we did like you in spite of yourself in season one. But once you let your ego take control of your behavior, we couldn't condone that. You self-destructed, Jill. It wasn't Bravo, it wasn't Andy, it wasn't Bethenny, and it wasn't the "haters". It was you.

I honestly wish you the best of luck, and I hope you got the closure you needed out of making a total ass of yourself on Andy's show. Now, focus on the future and like Heather says, "Keep it movin'".

What did you think of Jill's appearance on WWHL? Tweet me!

Have Several!

It's time to run down the week in Watch What Happens Live-ness, and it was quite a spectacular week! I really enjoyed all of the shows. I think that vacation did everyone some good. Check out all of the After Shows here.

Sunday, March 25: Coco (T) and Cynthia from RHOA. I loved this show. It was so silly and fun and the girls really got along well together. Coco's ass was the main attraction, but hey, that thing is a celebrity in it's own right. The game (Coco T or Coco A) was so funny. Definitely a good time. Andy seemed happy to be back, also.

Monday, March 26: Casey Wilson and Tamar Braxton. Maybe one of the oddest pairs on the show so far. It took Casey a good moment to get used to Tamar, but once she did, it was a lot of fun. And I loved the bartender - a gorgeous drag queen by the name of Tanika Braxton. This show was super entertaining once everyone loosened up.

Tuesday, March 27: Jenna Jameson and Clay Aiken. Another odd pair, but they got along great. I loved Clay's sense of humor and Jenna was actually really funny. The whole show was pretty raunchy but didn't go too far, so that was good. Jenna was candid and totally honest about her life and career, which I like in a celebrity. And Clay's little digs were awesome. And I agree, Rihanna, I love you, but your voice isn't on point all the time. There were some tv appearances a while back that were no bueno. Andy, of course, was all googley eyed over Jenna, and he maybe fell in love with her a little bit.

Wednesday, March 28: Ryan Serhant, Fredrik Eklund, and Michael Lorber (AKA the guys from Million Dollar Listing New York). To be honest, I've only see a couple episodes, but these guys are fun, and I am a little in love with Fredrik. I don't know why. Don't judge me. The guys were a little snippy with each other but I think that's just what their chemistry is like. I gotta catch more of their show because apparently there are wallaby and other wild animals on there, which, let's be honest, is a plus.

Thursday, March 29: JB Smoove and Shannon Elizabeth. Very fun show, mostly because of JB's speeches and rants throughout the night. He couldn't give a short answer if his life depended on it, and I'm not complaining. I think he's so funny. And we got a look at Larry David's real life parking garage situation from a couple days ago via TMZ. Shannon was nice and very sweet and played well with Andy and JB. So, a good show and a good way to close out the week.

Sunday, Phaedra and GG will be in the clubhouse. Monday, we have Shannon Doherty and my girl Kristin Chenoweth. On Tuesday, Chris Klein and Tori Spelling are on the show. Wednesday is a Bravo All Star party, who knows what that means, and Thursday, my gurl, Kathy Griffin. I'm definitely calling in on Sunday to talk to GG, Monday for Kristin, Wednesday just because, and absolutely on Thursday to hopefully talk to Kathy. She's one of my inspirations for sure.

Have an awesome weekend, kids!!!

I Heart Randall!

It's been SO long since I blogged about my beloved Watch What Happens Live, I'm so sorry. So I figured I could do a quick run through of the shows now. Please bare with me!

Feb 23: Jesse Tyler Ferguson and Lisa Kudrow - so fun and cute together! Jesse is one of my favorite gingers in the world, and Lisa's awkwardness is so charming.

Feb 27: Megan Hilty and Nick Jonas - I haven't watched Smash but her personality really intrigued me! I'm not a Jo Bro ho, but Nick was cool and his performance on Fallon recently was awesome so I give him a lot of credit.

Feb 28: Jackie Collins and Ali Wentworth - Jackie is so friggin' cool I can't stand it and Ali was a hot mess, a funny hot mess.

Feb 29: Sarah and Paul from Top Chef - I didn't watch this season! But they were cool.

March 1: Kris Jenner and Nancy Grace - oddly entertaining and actually funny! These ladies were up for anything and their energy was a lot of fun. Nancy really had fun with it.

March 4: Kandi Burruss - totally cool, great guest, and always open about everything. She was so great. The dress and makeup, not so much.

March 5: Lori Zaslow and Fran Drescher - I love Fran!! But she was so blah, maybe it was just an off night for her. Lori was cool, I need to catch her show!

March 6: Lisa Rinna and Alexis Bellino - You have to watch the After Show where Lisa talks about Celebrity Apprentice!!! So great! AND my boo, Randall of Honey Badger fame was the bartender. He was so great. LOVE!!!

Tonight's show's guests are Martha Stewart and Mark Consuelos, so make sure you tune in!!

A Love Letter to Andy Cohen and Watch What Happens Live!

OMG! I am so excited about the news that Watch What Happens Live! will be airing 5 nights a week, starting Sunday, January 8, 2012!

This means 5 nights of Andy Cohen in the clubhouse, and I, for one, am really super happy about this. I actually want Watch What Happens Live! to be an hour long, but if it's still 30 minutes, I'm ok with that. For those of you who aren't up on this particular show, first of all, where have you been? And second of all, it's going to be ok. Set your DVRs and prepare to be entertained!

Andy is an amazing host, charming and funny, and the guests are USUALLY a lot of fun. Not always, but 99% of the time. Guests are encouraged to relax and let their hair down, and that makes for a lot of really hilarious moments. Also, the audience tweets, facebooks, and calls in, not to mention there's a poll every show where the audience makes their voices heard on a subject of Andy's choosing.

Watch What Happens Live! is becoming a cultural phenomenon in its own right, and Andy and the clubhouse staff totally deserves all the success and recognition they have coming.

Sincerely, a fan for life,

Amanda (@humorandspice)