Live and Let Learn

Part 2 of the Real Housewives of Orange County reunion aired on Monday night and I think it was a fitting conclusion to the season. There's still a Lost Footage episode, which I believe airs July 24th. Let's get right into it because there were several bombshells dropped, accusations thrown, and eyes rolled. Oh, and creepy Brooks was there, too. But, thank heavens for Briana! (Congratulations on the wedding and the baby, Briana!!!) Can she be on every reunion? She was able to make sense of the whole Tamra vs. Vicki and everyone vs. Brooks thing. And she spilled the tea on Vicki and Brooks' emotional affair while Vicki and Donn were still married. Awkward!

Vicki: Let's just start with you to get it over with. You want to live your life and make your own mistakes - got it. But what you're not going to do is shit all over everyone else, then decide that it's ok to live and let live. Because that's exactly what you're doing. I'm all for learning things the hard way (believe me), but you can't judge others while you're doing that. Briana was absolutely right - just own it and don't project your stuff onto other people or deflect it by pointing out what other people do. At one point, you were throwing everything back at Gretchen, asking her if she was perfect, if she's never been hypocritical, if you admitting things makes her feel better, etc. It's not about Gretchen, it's about YOU. And speaking of taking responsibility, I hadn't even noticed that Brooks was using certain catchphrases and keywords from seasons passed. It all makes sense now! He's even more creepy than I thought! When he was sitting there, defending himself, I just couldn't take any of it seriously. I hope it doesn't take him cleaning you out for you to realize he's a scumbag. And the fact that you won't even listen to your own daughter's concerns really scares me. But, here's to learning the hard way. Just make sure when you do learn the lesson, you're humble enough to own it. I'm not even going to get into the alleged one night stand that Tamra revealed, because who knows how true that is. However, the emotional affair you had with Brooks while you were married is not ok just because Donn was cheating. It's sad that he did that to you, but why stay married during that? I would think you would be done with Donn as soon as you found out, not 20 years later? Something about that is very, very wrong. Vicki's grade for the week: D (for being stubborn, good luck with that).

Gretchen: Thank you for finally telling the real story behind the Fox 5 madness. I totally believe that you are being honest about it. I hope that Alexis can see that no matter what, you have tried your best to protect her feelings and not hurt her. Your back and forth with Vicki was long overdue, and I wish she could have just apologized for hurting your feelings the last couple of years, but hey, what's done is done. Overall, you did a great job on the reunion. You stood your ground and I think it paid off. Gretchen's grade for the week: A (for having proof to back up her story with Alexis).

Alexis: I hope you meant it when you said that you're working on becoming a better person, and I hope that you take all of the criticisms (constructive or not) and use them as a jumping off point for that very purpose. The discussion with Gretchen about Fox 5 was necessary, and I'm glad you saw the emails from that time frame - so you could see that Gretchen was not lying at all. She wasn't trying to sabotage or hurt you. You're right, she could have told you in a different way, but then again, maybe you two were just growing apart. But I really don't think she was being malicious towards you. Hopefully you two can be friends again in the future. But for now, just work on you. I don't think you're a bad person at all, I just think you can get to know yourself better and drop some of the facade that you have going on right now. Only good can come from being true to yourself. Alexis' grade for the week: C (for being defensive, but I think she can learn a lot from this whole experience).

Tamra: I don't like that you blurted out some dirty laundry about Vicki (although it was entertaining), because it really was uncalled for. I knew you were trying to make a point, but damn, you went for the jugular. And it really wasn't necessary, because let's face it, Vicki was already down - you didn't have to kick her. You know? As for the Brooks stuff, we already knew where you stood, so no surprise there. I know you play to win, but I think in the future, you might want to back off a little because you're coming across very Mean Girl, and I thought you were trying to get away from that. Unless you're cool with being the Mean Girl. In that case, go ahead, but already you know the hate/haters you'll get as a result. Tamra's grade for the week: D (for making good points, but being too hard with Vicki).

Heather: Good job, again, on being a voice of reason and articulating yourself in such a clear manner. There's no twisting of words or being defensive with you. You just tell it like it is. I thought you did a wonderful job on the reunion overall. And I like that you're still "Fancypants"! Heather's grade for the week: A (for keeping it real).

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Feel Her Hair!

Part 1 of the Real Housewives of Orange County Reunion was SPEC-F*CKING-TACULAR. I am so glad this reunion is as dramatic and loud as it is. I needed this!!! And let's just say the birds weren't the only ones launching attacks on the set (which were hilarious), each of the ladies got to fire their missiles at each other. The main targets were on the same couch, coincidentally, Vicki and Alexis. No surprise there. It is kind of sad that Tamra and Vicki hate each other now, but isn't that the way it always goes? You can only team up against other people for so long until you turn on each other. Any Housewives/Basketball Wives/Mob Wives watcher knows this. So let's jump in, oh and make sure to tease your weave and gloss your lip implants!

Alexis: Here's the thing. You know you're fake. Just like you know you say words incorrectly, you know how you behave. Just own it! Be that bitch, and say, "Yes, I like talking about my things and I do think I'm the sh*t." Then, at least, people could say you're real about it. But you want to have it both ways, and it doesn't work. And I don't doubt for one second that you are rude to the crew and to anyone else you consider beneath you. I found it very telling that you would "out" Gretchen's weave and lip injections just to make yourself look more real. Gretchen never outed you on anything - she pointed out things that people were already saying about you. You need to get yourself together, Alexis. You are in desperate need of a reality check and I'm here to give it to you (not that you'll listen). Stop trying to play like you're not a bitch who's full of herself. Because you are. The worst part is how childish you are about it: "Don't call me fake! Look! She has hair extensions and she's been lying about it!" Please. That's not the kind of fake we're talking about. Although that was good shade. I'll give you credit for that. Alexis' grade for the week: D- (she gets credit for the shade, but that's it!)

Heather: You are my friggin' hero this week! You got Alexis together! I agreed with everything you said and you said it perfectly. We all heard you, too bad Alexis didn't. You tried with her multiple times. You did your part. Now, it is what it is. I hope the other Housewives are taking notes. You were prepared, you were eloquent, you were logical. THIS is how you do it, ladies. I can't imagine anyone being able to find a flaw in your arguments. For those who say you were being mean, I don't think so at all. You have to state your case and get your points out there and that's exactly what you did. I thought you did great on this part of the reunion. Can't wait for next week. Heather's grade for the week: A+ (Awesome job!)

Vicki: I have to say I do feel sorry for you - not because you're a victim, but because you're on the receiving end of what you used to dish out to other people. The fact is: you had no problem judging others and putting others down. That's the truth. It sucks that your former BFF is now judging you and putting you down. It really does. And I'm not even saying it's right. But you do have to admit that what goes around comes around. If you would just say, "I treated people badly in the past and now I know how it feels", I guarantee you people would lay off. I swear. But, you get more and more defensive and try to minimize what you used to do. But we remember! Gretchen remembers! You were not nice to her! Now, I give you credit for telling Brooks to pay his child support, but that's no different than what Gretchen was/is doing with Slade. YOU and TAMRA both accused Gretchen of supporting Slade's decision not to pay child support, which we now know is false. But to hear you tell it, you're in a totally different boat. And you're not. I can't wait to see Briana on the show next week, and I hope you listen to what she has to say. She's your daughter, for crying out loud! Vicki's grade for the week: F (because what goes around, comes around, unfortunately for Vicki).

Gretchen: Thank you for trying to be the voice of reason on this first part of the reunion. Too bad it didn't really work out. But you tried! I agreed with pretty much everything you said, especially what you said to Alexis. And gurl, that was not right of her to throw you under the bus about your weave and lip injections! I thought Andy was going to jump up and feel them both! You really handled it well, though. You really didn't get mad about it, which was the best thing because Alexis just wanted a reaction. My only question is, why not tell us about the extensions/injections in the first place? That I just don't understand. We wouldn't have judged you for it, you know. I'm just curious as to why you didn't want to share it, that's all. Gretchen's grade for the week: C (for giving us straight talk, but what's with hiding the enhancements from us?)

Tamra: I, personally, don't think your hair was that heinous, but hey, I like big hair. Now that we've settled that, let's talk about your performance on part 1 of the reunion. I was glad to hear you say you missed Vicki. I know you do. I think you're just not willing to have the same type of friendship with her anymore. Where you both just hate on people. You have a different life now. My advice to you now is to drop the whole Brooks thing. If you keep going after Vicki, you're going to look majorly crazy. You have to let it go and wish her well. That's the only way to keep your sanity at this point. Look at how you've had to apologize to Jeanna and Gretchen for going after them in the past! Stop the cycle! Just realize that while you may be outraged about something that someone else is doing, it's their life. Focus on yours. Hopefully, Vicki will learn her lesson and you two can build your friendship back up again. I am glad you and Gretchen are still cool. It shows you can put the past behind you. Tamra's grade for the week: C (because she's right about Vicki, but she doesn't need to go after her so hard).

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The Friggin' Evil Eye

The season finale of Real Housewives of Orange County was one of the best I've seen in a long time. The backdrop was gorgeous (Heather, I still want you to adopt me) and the drama was EPIC! At every turn there was another crisis, walk out, toast, evil eye, or screaming match. It was absolutely unreal how entertaining this hour of television was. And it made me not regret watching so much tv. Because if you watch enough of it, something extraordinary like this comes along. All other Housewives, pay attention. All season finales must be as dramatic as a telenovela from now on. Get into it.

Let's go!

Heather: I'm starting with you because we're officially BFFs in my head. You can be as fancy as you want. When it's time to throw someone out of your house, you throw them out of your house! You were not playing with that looney bird, not one bit. I loved the diamond in the champagne glass idea - so incredibly out of my league, but I love it. And now, I'm only going to say "shamps" instead of champagne. So classy. The only thing I have to call you out on was interrupting Terry and Jim's conversation. We know Jim doesn't come around because he hates being around the Housewives, so the fact that he and Terry were making a little bit of progress was awesome. But as soon as you came up, he tensed up. They really should have talked another time, but it happened and that's that. I know you meant no harm by joining the conversation, but it really didn't help the situation at all. Terry is a little feisty, though! He's almost as catty as the girls sometimes! I really hope you come back next season and show us your restaurant! Can't wait for the reunion! Heather's grade for the week: B (her only mistake was interrupting Terry and Jim).

Alexis: I think this is your last season on the show. I think it's great you and Jim have such a tight bond and you have each other's back, but it was a little jarring to see him take off without telling you anything. And then you had to jump into the car at the last second before he sped off! To be honest, it looked a little "Pretty Woman", no? Ok, just saying. Anyway, you were way out of line for putting your hands in not only Heather's face, but Slade's face as well. And I'm not a Slade fan, per say, but it was really rude of you to do that. You weren't listening at all, and you were almost as whiny and annoying as Sarah. And here's a question: If Bravo put her in your limo and made you go to the party with her, then why were you defending her all night??? I'm just saying, again. Now, let's talk about this Jim thing and how he basically asked you if you wear the pants in the marriage in front of everyone. Um, the answer is no. You don't. And that's obvious. I'm sure it was meant in a joking manner, but seriously, Jim's never been super nice to you in social settings (on camera). So, really this remark didn't surprise me, but it did irk me. But hey, if you like it, I love it. Focus on your trampoline parks and say goodbye to the show. We're over you. Alexis' grade for the week: C (for standing by her man, but she's still annoying as hell).

Gretchen: I'm so glad you didn't get involved in the Tamra/Vicki disaster this week. You did the right thing and stayed out of it. I also want to say I totally agreed when you told Alexis to get her hand out of Slade's face, you were so right about that! I think your gift to Tamra was sincere and very nice. I hope you two remain friends. I think you should come back next season for sure - we want to see if you and Slade have babies and get married, of course. But also, you've been able to mend things with your arch enemy and it shows that people can bury the hatchet once and for all. And that's something to celebrate. Gretchen's grade for the week: A (for ending the season on a high note).

Tamra: Now, we all know you were half in the bag at this party. So, you were probably right on the edge. So when Brooks challenged you, you just took a swan dive right off of it. Not that I blame you, but it was ugly. The best thing would have been to ignore it, or just say "Yes, I rolled my eyes". However, there was a point where you could have stopped it. When you followed Vicki and Brooks out of the house, that was too much. It was way too much. Also, when you came up to Jim and Terry, you were not going to make that conversation any better. That's why Jim ran. I don't know if he's afraid of the "truth", but he's definitely not willing to speak to you. You can take that any way you want. I can't really defend you even going over there, because it had nothing to do with you. Jim was telling Terry what he heard and Terry and even Heather were setting the record straight because YOU misquoted him. So really, you should have only been there to say that you misspoke, which you weren't going to do. I actually like you a lot, and I'm glad you're engaged to Eddie and happy. But, you have to learn how to pick your battles. Not everything warrants a screaming match. It sucks to watch a friendship implode, but that spectacle between you and Vicki was disgusting. Tamra's grade for the week: F (because she could have handled all of that so much better).

Vicki: Can I just say, the screaming. The screaming was totally unnecessary and completely disgusting. I know you just want people to respect your choices and leave Brooks alone, but here's the thing. You don't respect other people's choices and you don't leave people alone when you don't like them. So, it's a little hard to feel sorry for you right now. I mean, the whole evil eye thing? Seriously? Like you haven't rolled your eyes before? Come on, now. I guess it was chivalrous of Brooks to stand up to Tamra for you, but I have to question a man who instigates an argument with a woman at a party over an eye roll. Kind of crazy, no? And then, he realizes he looks stupid when Briana tells you you're isolating yourself and then rushes back into the party with you. It's all very weird. Like he's trying to play a part or something. People are picking up on it and you're not. It doesn't mean they're right about him, it just means there's something you're not seeing. And that should make you think. Most of all, when it's your daughter telling you that something isn't right. She has no reason to lie to you. Listen to her. And for the record, you should be so grateful your new son in law has manners because any other guy would have told you to get lost. This should be your last season. I know you're the OC OG, but it's not working for you anymore. No more woo-hoos for you. Vicki's grade for the week: F (for not listening to anyone, and for being completely blind when it comes to Brooks).

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Nip Slip and Bitten Bow

Part 1 of the Real Housewives of Orange County finale was friggin' epic. There was so much going on, that I was actually sad that it wasn't a two hour episode. And that's saying a lot because there have been some snoozer episodes this season. Heather's naming party was so over the top amazing, I want to change my name to Dubrow, too. Thank you to ImaJustSaying on Twitter for showing us Kara's (Jeana's daughter) nip slip that I totally did not see while watching the show. Crazy! Maybe it was karma for her making such a big deal about being at the same party as Tamra (a poncho? Really?). And let's address Miss Sarah right now. Bitch, you were wrong. And even if your a raging diabetic, there is no reason you had to break of a piece off the cake. No sugar problem in the world warrants that kind of bullshit. Your problem is, you don't like Heather and for SOME reason (ahem, Bravo producers), you went to her party, and you wanted to steal a little of her shine. That was the dumbest, most unnecessary, passive aggressive move I've ever seen. And no, it does not give you Housewife status. So take that off your Twitter name immediately. Sober up and eat that friggin' Oreo Heather gave you, and sit down!

Alexis: You really need to rethink who's on your team. Get as far away from Sarah as possible and make up with Gretchen. I'm glad you wanted to defend Sarah and be a good friend to her, but she was wrong, wrong, wrong. And you telling everyone that it wasn't a big deal was super annoying. Also, if it's such a burden being on this show and dealing with these women, there's the door. Don't let it hit you on the way out. Alexis' grade for the week: F (because I'm sick of her whining all the time).

Gretchen: I loved that you were so happy for Tamra and Eddie getting engaged. That was really nice to see. I think you're a real, genuine friend and unfortunately, Alexis is just a brat who can't take advice. Bottom line, you were there for her enough to be real with her and she couldn't take it. I'm glad you're not in a hurry to get married. You're entitled to have your concerns and you shouldn't do it unless you're ready and all of your issues with Slade are worked out - or at least in the process of being worked out. I can't wait to see you react to Sarah on next week's episode. Get her out of there! Gretchen's grade for the week: A (because I think she's a good friend, regardless of what Alexis says).

Vicki: I don't know where Brooks got that fur coat (gross), but if he can't afford his own dental work, he can't afford a f*cking mink coat. Get real. Now, you're in LaLaLand at Heather's party and I was going to forgive all that, until I saw the preview for next week when you and Tamra have a screaming match. Good God, Vicki. Please do not come back next season. You refuse to listen to what anyone has to say. Your way is the only way. Do you know how frustrating that is to everyone else? I just hope you wake up and see that everyone's perception of Brooks is what it is for a reason. And you don't help matters by being so defensive. I did love how appalled you were with Sarah, though. We're on the same page there. Vicki's grade for the week: D (because she needs to get a grip, fast).

Tamra: I am really happy that you apologized for the wine incident with Jeana. I hope you are able to control your anger better in the future. But, according to the previews for next week, you and Vicki get into it and it's not pretty. I think you are a happier person now that you're with Eddie, but Angry Tamra is still in there. May I suggest therapy? Just a thought. You were also anti-Sarah and I totally agree with you on that. She was so wrong. Tamra's grade for the week: B (for apologizing to Jeana - I can't count next week's preview against her, gotta watch and grade that week on its own).

Heather: Your face was PUH-RICELESS when you were telling the girls about Sarah tearing off a piece of the bow on your cake and chowing down on it. So funny. I know you were pissed, but that was so hilarious to me. I don't think you overreacted at all. She should have apologized. Instead, she wanted to argue. You really should have asked her to leave right then and there and told her to take Alexis with her. Sarah got off easy, in my opinion, and you gave her an Oreo! For her sugar problem! I love it! Your party was gorgeous, by the way. I really hope you come back next season. Heather's grade for the week: A (for her facial expressions alone, you know I love me some facial expressions).

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Overboard

I haven't been blogging about Real Housewives of Orange County lately, because it's either been super boring or super exhausting. But, I figured this week was just juicy enough for me to blog about it and address the entire storyline of the Costa Rica trip in one shot. I couldn't make myself sit and write about Alexis' whining for three weeks in a row. Oy vey. So let's get going!

Alexis: I know it's not easy to have people confront you. And it doesn't help when there's alcohol involved and the main culprit is someone you already had words with not too long ago (Tamra). However, I think you missed the point. (Shocking!) Tamra was basically asking you to be yourself around the group and drop all the pretense. Which is not a mean thing to say. It's actually quite nice - she wants you to be the real you. And I think Gretchen heard that. So, for you to automatically get defensive, while understandable because of Tamra's delivery, didn't do you any good. I think if you would have stopped and thought about it and maybe taken a minute to yourself to absorb what they were saying, you would have realized it wasn't exactly an attack, but a simple plea to get to know the real you. It really wasn't about what kind of bag you brought or your nose job. It's about the way you project yourself to other people. Something about you is coming across as phony, but that may not be who you really are. I think you need to value a friend like Gretchen who was trying to be real with you, not be mad at her for not agreeing with everything you say. I don't think the vacation was worth all the trouble and you probably should have just stayed home. I hope you can do some self-reflection so you don't lose another friend (Gretchen), but I'm afraid you already have. And be careful with Vicki - she likes you today, but it's not guaranteed she'll like you tomorrow. I did like that you stood up to Tamra, though. I think when you spoke up for yourself we got a glimpse of the real you. You just need to harness that spunk and sass and use it to your advantage. Alexis' grade for the week: C (because now I just feel sorry for her).

Gretchen: I think you did your best with Alexis but you knew she wasn't going to take your comments the right way. For her, if you're not totally 100% defending her, you're not a good friend. That's probably why Peggy had enough. I don't want your friendship with Alexis to end the same way, but if Alexis can't be more self-aware, I'm not sure how you're going to avoid that happening. Other than the Alexis fiasco, you had fun on the beach with the girls. Maybe a little too much fun. Is it me, or is the whole undressing each other and bumping booties thing kind of 10 years ago for you? I mean, let's be real, you're not in college anymore and just because there's champagne ... you know what, nevermind. But you know what I'm saying. It wasn't as funny as you and Tamra may have thought at the time. The rafting trip looked like a real adventure and I like that you were in it and took it on like a champ. Gretchen's grade for the week: B (for being a trooper).

Vicki: There's times I wanna hug you and other times I wanna smack you. I think you need professional help for all the mood swings and irrational behavior you're throwing around. I mean, you stayed quiet during Alexis' little intervention, and you were nice to her in her room, in your own way I guess, but the rest of the episode you were up and down. The thing with the trees? And talking about dying? And the Don conversation? All of it just adds up to you not being ok emotionally. And believe it or not, I don't like to see you sad or hurting. So, really, I want you to get some help. Also, don't be in a relationship right now. I don't think that's helping (no matter who it is). You have to get to a place where you're happy by yourself before you be happy with anyone else. I just don't think you're there. Vicki's grade for the week: D (because she has some major issues to work out).

Tamra: You were a little annoying this week, I'm not gonna lie. The whole pants-ing thing was just sad. I can't believe a couple sips of champagne make you spiral into Girls Gone Wild territory. I say, cool it with the booze, maybe? Anyway, the tension between you and Vicki is pretty bad, and I think you should focus on that instead of beating Alexis down with an intervention. I mean, you didn't say anything that wasn't true, but your delivery sucked. Big time. And it didn't really improve the situation. You're lucky Gretchen and Heather softened the blow a little. Your friendship with Vicki is really important to both of you, so I hope that's a priority. She needs a good friend right now. Tamra's grade for the week: D (because she could have said what she needed to say in a much less hurtful way).

Heather: I thought you did great this week. You were really gentle and kind with Alexis, which I appreciated. Even your tone of voice was gentle, and that said a lot to me. You weren't attacking, you were trying to communicate with her. She wasn't really receptive to it, but you tried. I would have been just as annoyed as you were with Gretchen and Tamra's beach antics, so we're on the same page there. You went on the raft and did your best, and I think you did a great job with it. You even looked like you were having fun. Heather's grade for the week: A (because she handled everything with a calm, cool demeanor and I like that).

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Shade, Shade, Shade

Glamping is now part of our vocabulary, thanks to the Real Housewives of Orange County. Alexis took most of the ladies to a glamorous camping getaway, and even though it was pretty swanky, it was outdoorsy all the same. And of course, there was plenty of complaining about the elements. Tamra was still nursing her breast implant extraction, and Gretchen was nursing her voice - I still don't understand why that's taking so long. So, let's get into the episode more in depth.

Alexis: I think it was nice for you to invite everyone to the Glamping trip, but I don't think it turned out quite the way you planned. I like that you and Vicki got along, but your tit for tat with Heather is getting old. I don't know if it's because you just don't listen, or you just don't want anyone else's input or opinions. I think you need to open up a little more and let go of the control you so desperately seem to want to hold on to. And I didn't like you just throwing the garbage bags by the wayside for the staff at the resort to pick up. I think you confuse being glamorous and fabulous with acting superior sometimes, and that is so not a good look for you. I did like your dance break in the car, though. Alexis' grade for the week: D (because she needs to get a grip).

Gretchen: I understand how frustrating it is when your voice won't (or can't) do what you want it to do. But, really? This voice thing you're milking is getting super old. I truly can't wrap my head around how you destroyed your voice by having one screaming match however long ago. I get it, the incident with Vicki probably was more recent than it seems on the show. I'm pretty sure your Pussycat Dolls performance will be fine, because if the show is entertaining, they'll forgive you for not belting out your song. Also, I don't think your voice is that strong to begin with if screaming at someone does that much damage. Just saying. Gretchen's grade for the week: C (for needing to suck it up and quit whining).

Vicki: Once again, you were the meanest girl on the block this week. You were talking down to Tamra about getting her implants taken out, which really was out of line. Not to mention your less-than-nice comments about it in your interviews, saying that you were finally able to become friends with Alexis because Tamra wasn't there to influence you. Come on. You are the last person that should be talking about stopping people from being friends. That is your forte, sweetie. You had a moment of being nice on the Glamping trip but I have a feeling it's just a short term thing. Vicki's grade for the week: D (for being a shady lady).

Tamra: You get a pass from me this week because you're in recovery from getting your implants out, and you had to deal with Vicki's shade. Tamra's grade for the week: Pass (feel better and throw some shade back at Vicki).

Heather: I've grown to appreciate your humor, so I think I'm being fair here. You were being a little uppity at the Glamping site. Just a little. But I understand why, because dealing with crazy women would tense anyone up, I think. You were the only one listening and being respectful to the staff, especially with the whole starting-the-fire situation. I really don't think you were trying to steal Alexis' thunder at all, but you are a take charge person, that's just you. I didn't think you said anything too crazy about Alexis, but anything you say is going to offend her. Maybe next time, just let Alexis take the lead and don't say anything - we don't want you turning into a mean girl. Heather's grade for the week: B (because I want her to stay away from the mean girl path).

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I Just Want to Talk to You

This week's Real Housewives of Orange County was hilarious, thanks to one drunk fool named Sarah. Thank you, Gretchen, for dragging this moron with you to the bowling/champagne extravaganza! Otherwise, it would have been another boring episode. Nothing like a slurred argument to liven up a Housewives show!

Let's get into this episode, but just FYI, it will be on the brief side.

Vicki: I guess you're happy with Creepy McCreeperton Brooks, so I'm happy for you. But let me tell you something, if some guy gave me a greeting card every day, I'd run for my life. I don't have enough shoe boxes to house all those friggin' sappy ass cards. Give me a break. I'm glad you didn't engage in an argument with drunky Sarah, because really, the way it unfolded was perfect. Your reactions to her were priceless. Vicki's grade for the week: B.

Tamra: Good for you for getting your implants out. I think you look great without them. You were a trooper through the surgery (with your lip gloss on), so I got nothing but love for you this week. Tamra's grade for the week: A.

Heather: I truly admire your efforts to throw successful social events with these ladies. It never quite turns out the way you plan. But your intentions are always good. I think the bowling event was a success, despite Sarah's meltdown. And I loved how you tried to reason with her. Boo, there's no reasoning with someone in that state. You should have called her a cab and had security help her out the door. Heather's grade for the week: A.

Alexis: I felt more than a little embarrassed for you when you couldn't quite nail the guests' names/occupations on Fox 5 News, but then I wondered, are you a tad dyslexic or is it just nerves? I'm thinking if you slow down, you might not have as many pronunciation issues. Just saying. Anyway, I think you're in for a long, drawn out battle with Jim over this working outside the home stuff. You keep saying he's so supportive, when in fact, it looks like he thought it was just a phase and you'd be over it and back to being at home full time relatively soon. Unfortunately, you are kind of flipping the script on him now, because I'm sure when you got married, you both agreed what your role would be. So, be honest with yourself and with him and make sure you know what's most important for you. I don't think Jim is necessarily wrong to want you to keep your promises, and you're not wrong for having goals. I'm just saying you both may need to compromise a lot more than you may think. Alexis' grade for the week: C.

Gretchen: Your gurl Sarah is CRAZY! LOL! I mean, she was drunk and had it out for Vicki. I think you should have sent her home after the first outburst. And why didn't her fiance get her the hell out of there? I'm glad you stood up for Vicki and didn't cosign on Sarah's craziness. But, it was pretty funny, though. Also, how long are we going to have to hear about you losing your voice? Did all this happen in the same week or two? Because frankly, you talking about losing your voice is driving me up the wall already. Drink your tea and rest, please! Gretchen's grade for the week: B.

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Yawn

Is it just me, or is this season of the Real Housewives of Orange County getting kind of boring? I don't know if I just don't care as much anymore, or if they're just not bringing it, but it's not looking good right now. So, this blog will be a short one. 

Alexis: Maybe you just have a low tolerance for pain, but you kind of overdid it when the Dr. took your nose cast off. I'm not hating, I'm just saying, you were kind of being a baby about it. And again, with the complaining about Gretchen not being a good enough friend. Enough already! She came to see you, she has her own life, and it's not all about you all the time. Alexis' grade for the week: D. 

Gretchen: Some people are saying you faked the ankle injury, but I don't think so. I think it was just an unfortunate coincidence. You had a good time with everyone on the Mud Run until then, though. I honestly can't even remember what you and Slade were talking about in the car on the way to the Mud Run, and that's not a good sign. Sorry. Gretchen's grade for the week: C. 

Vicki: I'm so glad Briana is cancer-free. That's great. I'm not so keen on Brooks. Creepy and pushy and kind of annoying. You two are made for each other. Mazel. Vicki's grade for the week: C. 

Tamra: I can definitely understand why it's difficult to finalize a divorce, it means it's really over. I've heard a lot of women say it's like a failure, especially when kids are involved. But you're happily engaged now, so I think you'll be ok. And I completely cosign on the breast implant reduction. On Watch What Happens Live a while back, you looked great. Tamra's grade for the week: B.

Heather: You entertained me the most on this episode. The shopping trip was fun, the workout with Tamra was fun, and you kicking ass on the Mud Run was fun. So, you're essentially the winner this week. Nice! Heather's grade for the week: A. 

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Let's Take the Helicopter!

This week was a nice break from the screaming and yelling on Real Housewives of Orange County. We got to meet some of Heather's friends, who own helicopters! Tamra wants less boobs and Alexis gets less nose. Briana has her surgery with some mixed results. I loved the emotional aspect of this episode because after all, these ladies are human and have feelings just like the rest of us. Now, let's get into it!

Heather: I love that you and your friends want a project and a place to meet and socialize. I actually think it's a pretty good idea. Just make sure you have people working with you that will bring your vision to life and not just take money from you and your friends. Speaking of your friends, they seem very nice and very sweet. And very rich. All good things! I have no doubt the restaurant will be a success, if only for the simple fact that you all will go there and bring more fabulous people there to spend their money. It's kind of a perfect plan. Like I said, though, make sure everything is done to perfection, which I know you will. I like that you have normal-ish friends who aren't all bitchy and catty. Good for you. I also like that you admit that you're not a cook. Too many women pretend like they're master chefs when they aren't. Thanks for owning it. Heather's grade this week: A.

Tamra: Your reactions to Heather's friends was hilarious. On one hand, you were impressed, and on the other, you weren't buying what they were selling at all. LOL! I just think it's funny how you were so turned off by the one who owned the helicopter. So funny. I totally agree with you about taking out the implants. I cannot believe your boobs grow even after a boob job! Who knew?! Simon was an ass to tell you not to take them out. If you want them out, go for it. Tamra's grade for the week: B.

Vicki: I can't even imagine what it was like to see Briana go through that horrible surgery and then not even know if she'll be ok after it's all over. I hope she's ok now. I'm giving you a pass this week because this whole Briana thing is heart breaking. However, I will say this: STOP SAYING LOVE TANK. It's annoying. Vicki's grade for the week: Pass.

Gretchen: Performing with an established act like the Pussycat Dolls would make anyone nervous, so I don't blame you for semi-freaking out while checking out the show. I think you'll do great, by the way. But, I can't get over you setting your hair on fire! Really?! LOL! That was so hilarious. Gretchen's grade for the week: B.

Alexis: The crap they pulled out of your nose is proof enough that your sinuses were legitimately jacked up. Case closed on that. But all that gore and bruising makes me never have a nose job ever ever ever. It looks like it hurts, so I'll be kind and not give you any grief for being a baby about it. I can't handle pain, so I'm no one to judge. Alexis' grade for the week: B.

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Spring Break

Watch What Happens Live is off on vacation next week, so I wanted to briefly recap this week's episodes and let you all know what I thought of the guests! 

Sunday, March 11: Reza from Shahs of Sunset and Nene Leakes were SO MUCH FUN together. It was a really great show. Reza is vivacious and outrageous and even made Nene blush a couple of times. I love his personality. He and Nene were a good team. Very good show. 

Monday, March 12: Nicole Richie and Sean Avery. Um. I could have done without this show all together. Nicole was ok, but Sean looked bored and acted as if the show were beneath him somehow. This guy clearly didn't want to be there. It was so awkward. Painful to watch. I literally couldn't wait for it to be over. 

Tuesday, March 13: Bridesmaids and Reno 911 star and one of my all time favorite funny ladies, Wendi McClendon-Covey was in the clubhouse!! And Vicki Gunvalson was there too. Not that I don't like Vicki, but come on, Wendy's the star of that duo. Vicki was clearly up for a good time and didn't even get mad when Miss Piggy visited and chatted a bit. That was so funny, because you could see Andy trying to read whether Vicki was offended or not. I actually think Vicki can be fun sometimes. Just don't ask her about Slade anymore! We're over it!! 

Wednesday, March 14: Another favorite funny lady of mine, Kristen Johnston, and Jeff Lewis, with Jenni Pulos as the bartender totally made the show for me. Those three had a friggin' blast. Kristen talked about her book, Guts, which I cannot wait to read, and Jeff talked about the show and had some hilarious back and forth with Kristen. Totally awesome show. 

Thursday, March 15: Big Ang (my girl!) and Cee-Lo were in the clubhouse and they were actually a really good combination. Big Ang was a little on the quiet side at first, but soon enough she was cracking jokes and having a blast. Cee-Lo always gives good talk and the game they played was hysterical. I love me some Voice chair turning realness. Really fun show. 

I can't wait for Andy to come back from vacation!! Check out the After Shows, since they're always a lot of fun. 

None of Your Business

The 80s raged on with the Real Housewives of Orange County this week. The Bunko (Bunco?) party from hell continues with Gretchen and Vicki finally going at it over Slade's comedy routine. But the fights don't end there. A defensive Alexis gets snippy with Heather, Tamra, and Gretchen over her upcoming nose job/sinus surgery. Then, Briana goes in for her surgery hoping for the best. We got to see Don this week, and he looks great and seems to be happy - or as happy as possible while going through a divorce. We miss you, Don!

So, let's dive right in, shall we?

Alexis: I think you took the snickering and laughing as a jab at you because you're still not trusting of Tamra and Heather. The fact that they even mentioned your surgery was going to set you off regardless. I'm not saying it's right, but that's probably where you were coming from. Wanting Gretchen to always jump up and defend you is not really mature, though. You stood up for yourself and she wasn't taking sides. I don't know what else you expect her to do when she's in the middle - literally. I say, let them laugh. Do what you want and don't pay attention to what anyone (especially Tamra) has to say. Alexis' grade for the week: C.

Gretchen: You went to bat for Slade in a major way this week. Not only did you defend yourself and make it clear you didn't sign off on the "comedy" bit, but you slammed Vicki with the whole Brooks is a deadbeat dad thing. I loved it when you were able to stand up and say that Slade was never any of Vicki's business either. That was great. But did she get it? Of course not. You're not going to be able to get anywhere with her, so it's best to just drop it. I think you were a good friend to Alexis, but because she's so needy, it's never enough. You're just in one tough spot after another, kiddo. Gretchen's grade for the week: B+.

Vicki: I feel for you. You are going through a lot. But you have got to start listening to other people. For example, you didn't get what Gretchen was trying to say at all. You kept repeating that you don't condone a man who doesn't support his kids - but yet, you're dating someone who has that same issue in his past. Don't you think Slade would have been in jail by now if everything you're saying is true? And beyond that, why is it your concern in the first place? You can dislike someone and keep your opinion to yourself about them. It is possible. And it's ridiculous that you would expect people to NOT talk about Brooks when you talk about EVERYONE. It's karma, and you're face to face with her. Do yourself a favor and stop talking and start listening. When Briana says it's always about you no matter what, that's a big problem. Especially when she's the one who might have cancer. Think about it. Vicki's grade for the week: F.

Tamra: It's almost as if we have two Tamra's. The good friend who brings coffee and doesn't want people to fight at her party, and the mean girl who tells someone who's insecure about their nose that their nose is big. Wow. I do think you're a good friend, but I also think you're a mean girl who likes to talk sh*t. There's nothing wrong with that, but it won't keep too many friends around. I think you say what you need to say to Vicki and you say what you need to say to everyone else. Is that being bipolar? Or just fake? I guess it all depends on the intention behind it. And with you, I'm never quite sure. Tamra's grade for the week: D.

Heather: Your expressions were priceless this week. I love that you wanted to make it right with Alexis, but let's be real, you guys were kind of laughing at her. Or maybe at the idea of someone saying it's a sinus surgery when it's really a nose job, and she just happened to be the person that inspired the conversation. Either way, I don't think you were being malicious at all. And yes, these women really do act like this. You weren't there last year for the drink throwing and pushing. Oh yeah. Heather's grade for the week: B.

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Bunko!

This week on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, we went back to the 80s! Because everyone loves a theme party! But don't get too excited, the drama definitely outweighed the fun.

Tubular!

Tamra: I am so proud of you for calling Gretchen and addressing Slade's comedy routine. That was a very mature gesture. Also, you didn't participate in the sh*t talking at the Bunko party. However, I do have to call you out on having a totally different take on things when you're alone with Vicki. You should have been honest with her and told her you were going to take Heather's (great) advice and shut down the drama once and for all. Then Vicki could have been in on it with you. Why are you so afraid to tell Vicki how you really feel? I will say you are a great friend to Vicki and you're there for her while she's going through a rough time. I respect that. Tamra's grade for the week: B.

Vicki: I feel for you, I really do, but you have got to get some perspective. You really were hurt by Slade's comments, but you didn't pick up the phone and let him know that what he said hurt you. You didn't even reach out to Gretchen. This is why people don't like you. You'd rather b*tch about it behind their backs and play the victim. Let's be real. You have something negative to say about people 99.9% of the time. I'm not saying what Slade did was right, but damn, grow a pair and confront the man yourself and don't wait for a couple of sh*t starters to get you all fired up about it at a friggin' party. Seriously. Also, I really hope Briana's ok. Vicki's grade for the week: D.

Gretchen: Besides your odd 80s impersonations, I was totally seeing eye to eye with you this week. This is between Slade and the ladies, not you. And you didn't say or do anything wrong at the comedy show. Everyone knows that. The fact that CJ accused you of doing something wrong just shows he didn't have the full story. You defended yourself well, and you didn't excuse Slade at all. You left it in his hands. Which I thought was smart. Gretchen's grade for the week: B.

Alexis: Your nose job is actually kind of interesting, and you looked GREAT as Madonna in Desperately Seeking Susan. I really like that look on you. I thought you were a little overly dramatic at the doctor's office, but you were probably just scared about the surgery. I know I would be. The whole crossing yourself at the Bunko game was a little off-putting, but I'm guessing you were joking and of course, alcohol was involved, so I highly doubt you were serious about God helping you win. Alexis' grade this week: C.

Heather: I loved your 80s outfit. I was born in 1982 and I know who Robert Palmer is and I have the Addicted to Love visual burned into my brain, so don't worry, some of us got it. And did you say Robert Williams instead of Robin Williams when you were talking about the comedy show with Tamra? I thought that was hilarious. You stuck up for Gretchen when CJ was spilling out wrong information, which I appreciated. You're alright sometimes, you know that? I think your issues with Alexis are kind of silly because you're just so annoyed by everything she does. It's hilarious to me. Heather's grade for the week: B.

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Housewives Hunter

So, this week on the Real Housewives of Orange County, it wasn't all laughs. Frankly, it was awkward chuckles at best. Wow. Vicki and Tamra discuss Gretchen, Alexis and Heather meet for lunch, Gretchen and Slade do their comedy routines, Eddie wants to move in with Tamra, and Briana has a serious talk with Vicki. There's so much going on, I think I need a Valium.

Here we go.

Gretchen: Well, I gave you and Slade the benefit of the doubt and you proved me wrong. So wrong. Your set was confusing because you weren't setting up the jokes correctly. I wish you would have just focused on being charming and being a good host for the evening. It really wasn't expected that you had to be funny. You're a fun girl, you would have done better just chatting with the audience. Instead you pulled the whole bikini stunt, and it just seemed forced and uncomfortable. Slade's set was awful. I was willing to give him a chance, but damn, it was so bad. I know he had some bright spots, but I think he was too harsh on the other ladies. He took his anger out on them on stage, which was not a smart move. He should have been more self-deprecating and maybe slipped in a few digs, but that should have been the extent of it. He went way over the line. If he would have talked about himself and poked fun at himself, he would have gotten a much bigger laugh. The unflattering pictures were in poor taste. You had every right to be mad at him for doing his set that way after you asked him not to. And you're right, the sh*t is going to hit the fan now. Hopefully you can make the distinction that it wasn't you saying those things and that you were against it from the beginning. Gretchen's grade for the week: C.

Tamra: Your talk with Vicki about your friendship with Gretchen was almost painful to watch. I swear, how old is Vicki again? Maybe she just needs to be reassured that she's still your favorite. Which, again, is so childish, it's not even funny. Plus, you're enabling this idiotic behavior by babying her so much. I don't get it. Eddie talks about moving in, something most ladies would be absolutely ecstatic about, but you're not so sure. I totally understand your hesitation. You're not even officially divorced yet. And I totally agree - you need to find out who you are by yourself before you move forward with your relationship with Eddie. There's nothing wrong with wanting to be independent. I'm glad Eddie is supportive of you right now. Appreciate that and make sure you use this time wisely. Open up that business and grow as much as you can so you can be a better person and partner in the future. Tamra's grade for the week: B.

Vicki: Good God, get a grip, gurl (Trademark: Latrice Royale). Why are you so insecure about Tamra being friends with Gretchen? Seriously. I really don't understand why you're so upset about it. I concede that it is a little odd, maybe even strange, but here's the thing. You're overreacting about it. You should be happy Tamra is over the negativity and she's actually doing something positive for a change. But you're not. Is it because you are happiest when you're around negativity? I hope that's not true, but your little tantrum in your kitchen pretty much confirms it. On a much more positive note, your dinner with Briana was very touching. I really hope she's doing better. She's a great girl, I really like her. A voice of reason if there ever was one. Vicki's grade for the week: D.

Heather: I loved your frozen face at the stand up show. That expression of pure shock and cringiness was so priceless. I could watch your Botoxed mug all day. And those eyebrows are truly works of art. I love that you have lunch with Alexis and grill her about her "anchor" job, oh and then you totally bash her in your interviews. So wrong. It was so hilarious. But you are one b*tchy queen. Heather's grade for the week: C.

Alexis: I think you need to do some research and find out what an anchor actually does. You're more like a correspondent. I can't even get mad at you, you're so simple minded. You said you laughed all the way through Slade's set, probably because he was targeting the lowest common denominator of comedy. That's not a compliment. Alexis' grade for the week: F.

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BFFs

This week's Real Housewives of Orange County was busting at the seams with the green eyed monster I like to call JEALOUSY. Are we really going here at this age, ladies? The immature meter may have shattered with this episode. We have Vicki and Alexis jealous of Gretchen and Tamra's friendship, Tamra jealous of Eddie and Vicki high-fiving, and Alexis jealous of Heather's whole existence. Pitiful.

Let's go.

Heather: I'm still not sure how to feel about you. You admit you're very picky, but you blame it on being from New York. You send food back at restaurants 90% of the time, according to your husband. I just can't with that. You know you're getting your food back with spit on it, right? Anyway, I thought you were super nice to the girls by having that painting party. That's something I would have enjoyed. And it wasn't like they were painting the side of a house or anything. They were being taught to draw a cute picture by a professional. I love it! I think the ladies were just thrown because they're not used to activities where drinking is not the main event. I was put off by your little tantrum at the end of the party, though. Sure, your husband is annoying, but do you have to react like a total child about it? No one chased after you to find out what was wrong, so take that as a hint that the theatrics have no effect on these women. Like I said, I'm still on the fence about you. Heather's grade for the week: C.

Alexis: Wow. I didn't think you could possibly be more childish, but apparently, you are! Just because Gretchen and Tamra are friends doesn't mean she loves you any less. But seriously, how old are we that we even need to be having this conversation? Soooo stupid. Alexis' grade for the week: F.

Vicki: You should be the most mature of the bunch, but you're acting like the biggest brat of them all. It's so disappointing to see you literally cringe at the sight of Tamra being nice to Gretchen. Then you diss Tamra at the painting party and don't even say goodbye to her. That's just wrong. Instead of trying to control everyone and everything, why don't you focus on yourself and see why you feel so jealous in the first place? This is not the Vicki we love. Vicki's grade for the week: F.

Tamra: I'm glad you apologized to Eddie for Boob-gate. Seriously, how many times did Eddie say "boob" in the last two episodes? 50? Anyway, you have no reason to be insecure about Eddie and Vicki, so calm down. And you're right, alcohol had everything to do with it. From now on, keep your hands and boobs to yourself. I still like your friendship with Gretchen, despite Vicki's daggers being thrown at you. Maybe you should ask yourself why you want to be friends with someone who can't let go of the past and insists on holding grudges. Just saying. Tamra's grade for the week: B (for boobs, just kidding.)

Gretchen: You handled the whole Alexis and Vicki vs. Tamra and Gretchen thing well at the painting party, and you're right, it was a bit competitive. I truly don't know how you're gonna keep your friendship with Alexis after this, but if you do, please tell us how you did it. She seems so needy and immature. You couldn't hide your skepticism over Slade's comedy debut, and from the previews, you're right to be skeptical. However, as someone who has done stand-up (4 times at open mic nights, nothing special), you can't judge a set by just a couple seconds. I thought I saw "Housewives Hunter" on his shirt, in which case, I'm assuming there's a whole set up behind the "BOOM BOOM" he's doing on the preview. I'm willing to have an open mind, since Slade is a clever guy and has good timing. We'll see how he does next week. As for Vicki and her alleged deadbeat dad boyfriend, you really couldn't win either way - whether you told Slade or not - because he would have found out eventually. Better he hears it from you. And his reaction is justified given what Vicki's said about him in the past. You're definitely in the middle this season. Gretchen's grade for the week: B+.

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I'm the Boss

It's only episode two of the current season of Real Housewives of Atlanta, and already the drama's at full tilt. First, Vicki's Cajun dinner party doesn't go as well as she had hoped, then Tamra crosses a line with Eddie. Let's get into all the cattiness right ... now!

Peggy: The whole Jim-Alexis fiasco is not your fault. I totally agree with you that it was Jim's call to tell Alexis about the fact that you two had dated. And seriously, it wasn't like you were still seeing him, so I really don't understand why Alexis is mad at you in the first place. All of the blame goes to Jim. Like Wendy Williams says, stay out of grown folks' business. It's so annoying that Alexis refuses to let it go. Even when she's trying to be nice, the stupid comments find a way out of her mouth. You were being super generous by even attempting to have a serious conversation with her, but I don't think you were shocked when she declined. You're the last person she wants to talk to. I think you're right to leave the show. If it's affecting your mental or emotional well-being, then it's time to say goodbye. I will miss you and your super structured eyebrows. You take care of yourself, girl. Peggy's grade for the week: A.

Heather: You rubbed a couple of the girls the wrong way at Vicki's dinner - I warned you about bragging about your money - but you really don't seem to care. In that case, keep on doing what you're doing and you'll be this season's most-talked-about housewife. There's nothing like new blood to make these ladies rally together. You're going to get it from all sides, just so you know. Oh and I love your house. Find a way to keep it. Maybe you could turn one of the media rooms into a studio apartment or something. Just saying. Heather's grade for the week: B.

Gretchen: You're in the middle with the whole Peggy/Alexis feud, and you seem to think Peggy is somewhat to blame. However, it wasn't a case of a girlfriend not telling another girlfriend something because she was hiding something. She was essentially honoring Jim's wishes. Therefore, Jim's fault. But you're defending Alexis, so that's fine. You're nothing if not loyal. But, I need to tell you something. Please stop referring to Slade as your "bitch". This whole "I'm the boss and you're the bitch" thing is not cute. I'm not a huge Slade fan, but it's just not cool to talk to or about the man you say you love like that. Even if it's a joke between you two. I can't imagine Slade is really ok with you saying those things. Deep down, it probably does hurt. Just respect him a little more if you really love him. Instead of saying he's your bitch and making fun of him for carrying pink bags and a pink laptop (which are YOURS, by the way), just say he's your partner or your colleague. He's doing a lot of your grunt work. Just think what it would be like if he wasn't there to do those things for you. Gretchen's grade for the week: D.

Alexis: You are very childlike in the sense that you don't necessarily want to see anyone else's perspective but your own. So I won't even bring up Peggy. What I will say is that you have to start realizing that there are other opinions out there besides your own. You gotta open up your mind or else you're going to find yourself by yourself. You're so content in your little bubble, but that bubble isn't going to last forever. I hope you can grow up some this season. And then go apologize to Peggy. Alexis' grade for the week: F.

Vicki: Your dinner party looked great, and I would have loved to try some of the Cajun food. But you know these ladies are all about looks and the whole crawfish thing was not gonna be up their alley. You had to have known that! You should have made it a little more accessible (pretty) for them, that's all. Your boyfriend seems nice and he seems like a gentleman, so he's alright in my book so far. I don't think you were flirting with Eddie at all. I think you all were bombed and you two were just bonding over something and it took a wrong turn. You know how Tamra is, so maybe you should have restrained yourself a bit. I bet next time you'll turn down the tequila shots. Vicki's grade this week: C.

Tamra: Well, you pretty much blew it this week. I know us women can get jealous over the smallest things, but did you really think there was something going on between Vicki and Eddie? Of course not! Seriously, what they were doing wasn't terrible, and it certainly wasn't as terrible as putting Vicki's boyfriend's hand on your boob. Eddie had every right to be upset and even though you were trying to prove a point by doing it, you shot yourself in the foot. And possibly the leg and stomach, too. Eddie's not the kind of guy that's gonna laugh that off. If you were really upset about him and Vicki being cozy, you should have taken him aside and talked to him. Or you could have left the table and cooled off. And sobered up. This is the problem when people drink too much together, the lines get blurred. Take it easy next time. Tamra's grade for the week: F.

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Dr. Booty

OC is back!! Who's excited? Woo hoo!! I think the Real Housewives of Orange County hold a special place in my heart because there's nothing like the original. Believe me, I love all the Housewives shows and all the cities they represent, but coming back to OC is just cozy for some reason. Makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside. LOL!

So without further ado ... let's go!

Gretchen: I give you major credit for putting your beef with Tamra aside and meeting with her for lunch. You accepted her apology and it turned out to be a really special moment between the two of you. But, we all know this can't last for long. So I'm anxious to see what happens. Although you did say on Watch What Happens Live last night that you two are still friends. I'm glad you and Slade are still together. I think I may be the only one on earth that actually likes your relationship with him. I wish you guys the best. Your friend Sarah was a little odd, but she seemed like a nice person, so I'm willing to give her a chance. You're starting off on my good side this season, let's keep it that way. Gretchen's grade for the week: A.

Tamra: Good for you for patching things up with Gretchen. I think that's an awesome way to start the season. I'm pretty sure Vicki will not mind as long as you keep her as your top priority - friend-wise, that is. I liked seeing you in your real estate mode, we don't get to see that very often. It did sadden me that your ex hasn't signed the divorce papers yet. Jeez, what is it gonna take with this guy? But you're right to just give him whatever he wants - ie: patio furniture, etc. Pretty soon there won't be any excuses left and he'll have to sign. The only problem I have with you is, you haven't learned your lesson about saying mean things in interviews. You can be funny without being mean. Like when you said Vicki and Don living in the same house is some Jerry Springer sh*t, did you really think Vicki was going to be ok with that? You know how sensitive she is. And then you go and say all this nice stuff about Heather, and in the next breath, you say you bet she's a bitch. Here we go again on the Tamra-coaster. Tamra's grade for the week: C.

Alexis: While I admire you for taking such good care of your family, it looks like you need a lot more help than just an assistant. Seriously, if you think you're some kind of journalist now, you're sadly mistaken. You may be a good guest on a television show, but hosting? It may just not be your thing. I am glad you're more independent and making money on your own, though. Did Jim say he didn't want to be on the show anymore? Because if so, tell him I said thank you. He's the worst. I can't believe you're still bitter with Peggy over the whole Jim thing. If she would have told you, you would have just been mad at her anyway. Whatever. Alexis' grade for the week: D.

Vicki: Thank the Lord you don't have your boyfriend come stay at your house. When you said that you thought it would be disrespectful to bring him into the house, I seriously applauded you. So many women would do the exact opposite just to spite their exes. I'm proud of you for keeping your new relationship out of Don's living space. I'm not saying I like your boyfriend, we haven't seen nearly enough of him to make a judgement call on him yet. But I do like how you're trying to respect Don even after all that's happened between you two. As far as Don wanting spousal support, I'm torn. Part of me is saying he shouldn't ask for it since he works and has no obstacles keeping him from working. But another part of me wonders how much more you make than he does and if it is fair to ask that you allow him to continue in the lifestyle he's grown accustomed to. So many times we applaud women for making the man who did them wrong pay up, but do we feel differently when the roles are reversed? Like I said, I'm torn. Then again, should a man even ask for spousal support just based on the fact that it is basically an admission that the woman in the relationship was more successful? Hmmm. Food for thought. Anyway, don't be too hard on Tamra when she tells you she's befriended Gretchen. You're under enough stress as it is. Vicki's grade for the week: B.

Heather: I don't know you too well yet, but you made a very good first impression. So far, I like what I see. You do have a tendency to make sure everyone in earshot knows how fabulous you are, and that can be a little off-putting. We'll have to keep our eyes on you and see how we feel next week. Heather's grade for the week: A-.

Peggy: Although you're not an official OC Housewife anymore, it was nice to see you on this episode. I'm sure you'll be making appearances throughout the season. I tend to believe you over Alexis on the Jim issue, but then again, you do make a lot more sense than Alexis does no matter what the topic is. Can't wait to see you and Alexis interact at the dinner party next week. Peggy's grade for the week: A.

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The Real Hypocrites of Orange County (Reunion Parts 1 & 2)

Well, hello again!

First, let me just clarify, this isn't going to be a recap, so if you haven't watched the reunion (both parts), check your local listings or go to http://www.bravotv.com.

The Real Housewives of Orange County reunions are always explosive. But something was different about this one. I guess the best way to put it is that there was no clear "winner", everyone came out looking a little guilty in the end. Which is appropriate, because all of these ladies got into the mud at some point during the season. Let's discuss!

Vicki admitted that she ended her marriage with Donn, and that it was her decision. She also revealed that she had the divorce papers served to him at work, per her lawyer. Ouch. Then we got to see Donn, and I have to say, I feel for the guy. But he's definitely better off without Vicki. I think he'll be just fine. As for Vicki, she's already in a new relationship (remind you of anyone? Tamra?) and says her love tank is finally full again. Gag. Vicki - I'm gonna be real with you. I think you're a smart lady and seem to be fun to hang out with, but you have got to stop being so selfish. Vicki also commented that her daughter Briana is at odds with her over her new boyfriend. I believe it! Briana has interviewed in the past that although Donn isn't her biological father, she sees him as her dad. It's a painful situation, and Vicki shouldn't be surprised that Briana is not on board with the whole new boyfriend thing. Vicki admitted she hurt Donn, and I give her credit for that, but there's something a little arrogant about her attitude when discussing it. Can't put my finger on it.

Tamra got into it with just about everyone this season and she seems to enjoy every minute of it. At the beginning of the season she tried (pretended?) to try to make nice with Gretchen, but then the evil eye hat came out and that was the end of that. Tamra had something to say about everyone (except Vicki and Peggy for the most part). My gut reaction to Tamra is that she likes the drama and can't help but get involved in everyone else's business so that she gets more camera time. The sad part is, she's a mom, and that never seems to cross her mind. Maybe because the kids can't watch the show or anything on Bravo, according to a court order. Maybe she feels like her kids will NEVER see it? But that's unrealistic. At some point, they will be old enough (over 18) to watch reruns/DVDs and see what was going on. And Tamra has been downright vicious at times this season. We've all seen it.

Gretchen stood up for herself against Tamra and Vicki and I feel she held her own. It's tough to go up against those two, and I give her props for doing so. Tamra and Vicki brought up any and all old insults they could find and threw them at Gretchen as if it was the first time they had ever argued. Gretchen knew better and kept calling them out on their own indiscretions, especially Tamra. But what impressed me the most is when Gretchen told Tamra that she is the one that gossips and talks to the press about everyone else and then gets mad when someone does it to her. Bingo! Another fun exchange was when Vicki literally screamed at Gretchen for doing the show while Jeff was dying. The whole thing was repetitive and didn't really go anywhere. Waste of reunion time.

Peggy confronted Alexis about not wanting her on the show, dating Jim, and the competition between them. Although I don't always agree on what Peggy says (sometimes she's just too out there for my taste), she made a lot of sense on the reunion. At one point, Andy Cohen asked her what Tamra and Gretchen should do to work things out and her answer was to "stop bitching". Wow! What a concept! But let's get back to Peggy and Alexis. I truly believe Peggy when she says Alexis changed and started treating her differently once she got the show. Alexis tried to say it was because she didn't want the show to ruin their friendship but I don't buy that. I think Alexis knew Peggy was likeable and would probably get along with her nemeses Tamra and Vicki, and that would tip the numbers against her and Gretchen. I could be reading a lot into it, but whatever. In any case, Peggy IS likeable and seems to be honest whether it's good or bad. I hope she comes back next season.

Speaking of Alexis, well, let's just say she didn't come out looking so great. Her explanations about her marriage, her views on liberals, and what couture means are always a circular conversation. When she finishes talking, you're never quite sure what it is she just said. It's like a little word maze and Alexis is always in the middle. Alexis tried to defend herself but her immaturity is just too overwhelming. For example, she blamed Peggy for not telling her that she and Jim dated casually in the past, instead of holding Jim accountable. Then she explained that they never discussed past relationships when they got together because they were starting a new chapter. Ok, fair enough. Then Alexis proceeds to tell Peggy she's a bad friend because she didn't reveal that little tidbit when they became friends. Wait, what?! I thought you didn't want to know about your husband's past?! Or is it that he's not willing to tell you, so you just don't ask ... Hmmmm. Either way, Alexis barely made any sense and I actually felt sorry for her. She needs to not be on this show anymore.

There were quite a few guests on the reunion. Slade came by and got into it with Tamra, again. About his child support issues, again. I swear, didn't we go over this last year? And possibly the year before? Can we give it a rest now? And I don't even like Slade! I don't agree with Tamra walking off and calling Michelle, the mother of Slade's son backstage. I think that was pretty low and just proves Tamra will do anything for some extra attention. Jeanna stopped in as well and Tamra ripped into her as well. I'm not a Jeanna fan either, but when Vicki said her loyalty is with Tamra, I think we all saw Jeanna's heart break a little. But like I said, I'm not a Jeanna fan, and she runs her mouth just as much as Tamra. So I'm not surprised her friendships with the remaining housewives have all crumbled. Lynn chatted for a bit and I don't really know what she was talking about but she's fun and silly and a nice diversion. I miss her.

Overall, this reunion was pretty tame except for a few standout moments. I think they could replace Alexis at this point and be ok. If they wanted to give Fernanda a bigger role, that would be alright if she became closer friends with more of the cast. And no more kissing Tamra. That's not good for anyone. I think Peggy should definitely stay, and maybe they should bring in a couple of new ladies. Change it up a bit.

What do you think? Agree? Disagree? Comment below or tweet me @humorandspice!!