Well, kids, the Real Housewives of New Jersey Reunion is officially over, with only a Lost Footage episode remaining. I don't know if I'll even bother watching it. Unless it's full of funny scenes we didn't get to see in this God-awful season. Speaking of God-awful, Part 3 of the Reunion was - for me - a waste of time. Nothing was really resolved, and no one came to any grand realizations. Big surprise. However, there were some moments of clarity, so it wasn't all bad. But most of it was ... really bad.
Did anyone else notice how Joe Giudice would never look Andy Cohen in the eye while answering questions? That's odd, no? It's just me? Ok.
The Husbands joined the ladies (and Joe Giudice) on the set for Part 3. I know I'm going to get raked over the coals for this, but I think Richie and Chris did a great job. They did what they were supposed to do, defend their wives. But what struck me about Richie is that, no matter what you think of his personality or his humor, he tells it like it is. I believe what he says. He may say it in an inappropriate or exaggerated way, but he's usually making fun of the situation and making light of it by making these wild comments. The essence of what he says, usually, is the truth. I did not enjoy Joe Giudice and Richie arguing, at all, though. That whole segment was pointless and annoying. Just like a conversation with Joe Giudice himself. Seriously, I have to just get this off my chest. Joe Giudice said on that set: "We don't need help from you people, thank you." He's absolutely right. They (Teresa and Joe) don't need help from friends or family. They're great on their own. Here's the problem: YOU'RE ON AN ENSEMBLE REALITY SHOW, DUMBASS!!! If you don't interact with these people, you're out of a job. Period.
I could go on and on about Joe Giudice's shitty attitude and profoundly irritating behavior, but I won't. I'm sick of talking about him and I will never again watch a show that features him. Ever. Mark my words.
Another thing that made me think was the fact-checking and research that everyone apparently did before the show. Jacqueline, I gotta call you out because you were like mother-f*cking CNN, constantly interrupting and pulling out little factoids ... are you in any way related to Joe Biden? Just asking. Anyway, there was a whole lot of tea spilled about everyone, but, as a viewer, there is no way to know what's true and what's not true. Was Jacqueline ever a stripper? Did Teresa say Melissa was a stripper? Did Caroline say Jacqueline was a stripper? Did Chris tell Joe Giudice he met Jacqueline when she was a stripper? You know what?? NO ONE CARES!! How about this: how about everyone just assumes everyone was a stripper at one point and gets the f*ck over it? All in favor, raise your hands. *Raises both hands*
Kim D. We have to talk about Miss Posche Fashion Show herself. Who showed up to say absolutely nothing. Teresa knew SOMETHING was going to happen, but she didn't know what. Great. Thanks for cracking the code on that one, genius. I swear, Kim D was about as useful on this episode as I am at a construction site - meaning I have absolutely nothing to offer anyone and I shouldn't even be there in the first place. Then, Jacqueline declines to name the person she was texting at the fashion show because they're still friends with Teresa. Some friend that mystery person is! Show your face, mystery friend! I want to know why you would reduce yourself to being Jacqueline's informant for this totally anti-climactic, humongous waste-of-time, alleged set up. Because, again, the set up was a total let down. There was no set up at all.
And that's another thing I'm mad about. They're talking about this set up like Teresa was Michael Corleone grabbing the gun out of the toilet or something. NOTHING ACTUALLY HAPPENED. Some idiot said some idiotic bullsh*t and everyone's having a conniption over it. This is why I'm done with this show if the same cast returns.
Andy, my darling Andy Cohen, listen to me. Let Teresa go have a cooking show somewhere. I'm begging you. I don't even care what you do with the rest of the cast. But if I have to see another season of Teresa vs. The Universe ... actually, no. I REFUSE to watch another season of Teresa vs. The Universe.
I have to address Melissa and Joe Gorga now. Joe, you seemed genuinely hurt about this whole thing with Teresa. All I can say is that if you want things to get better, go back to therapy with your entire family. If you honestly think Teresa took your parents' love or attention away from you, you have to figure that out with them as a family. Melissa, you told Teresa you're done, so my advice is to be done. Don't engage in the verbal tit-for-tat that we saw on this reunion. Don't bring anything to the table for discussion with her. Maybe, if and when Teresa and Joe are back on good terms, you can begin to repair your relationship with her. But you can't do any of that until your husband and Teresa are ok again.
As for Caroline and Kathy - thank you for not adding to the craziness in this episode. I think I speak for all sane, level-headed fans when I say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. This isn't what we signed up for. I now realize I love every single woman on this show: Teresa, Caroline, Melissa, Jacqueline, and Kathy - I love all of you. I love you enough to tell you that I cannot watch you all go at it again for another season. Let's stick a fork in this season and never speak of it ever again.
What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!
Showing posts with label Joe Giudice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Joe Giudice. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 16, 2012
Monday, October 8, 2012
RHONJ Reunion Part 2 - No Victims, No Bullies
Well, hello, kids and welcome back. You should know that this blog will not contain grades, because, frankly, we're waaay past that point, and really, we all know this season is a FAIL. Big time. However, there were some moments of clarity in Sunday night's RHONJ Reunion Part 2. But you know I can't be 100% serious about this stuff. So, proceed with at least a shred of a sense of humor, please.
We begin where we left off, with Rosie. Now, we know from Watch What Happens Live last night that none of the ladies could hear exactly what Rosie was saying backstage, so I'm curious to know what Teresa is saying about her tongue being threatened. (I can't check her tweets because I'm blocked. Have I mentioned this?) Lauren Manzo spoke to Rosie backstage and did a great job of getting her to calm down. I was actually very impressed. Once Rosie was on the couch, she was relatively calm. She and Teresa got into it for a moment regarding Teresa's claims that Kathy was upset about Rosie's sexuality. Now, we all know Teresa isn't good with timelines, or listening, so Rosie had to reiterate a couple of times that Kathy had a problem with Rosie's girlfriend at the time, not the fact that she was gay. I wanted to know more about this wrong path Rosie's girlfriend was leading her towards, but they didn't go into it. Suffice to say, Rosie checked Teresa by saying she was projecting her own point of view onto Kathy. Teresa denied it and said even Joe Giudice invited Rosie to hang out with them, which Rosie denied. Bottom line: I think Teresa accepts Rosie, just like Kathy does. You can see that Kathy and Rosie are close, and like Rosie said, they have a bond no one can break. All in all, that segment ended on a peaceful note.
Caroline really surprised me in a good way when she put her own problems with Teresa aside and tried to get her to stop going at it with Kathy before Rosie came on the set. She kept saying, "This is wrong!", and she was absolutely right. It had gone way too far, and it needed to stop. Even Andy said they were just trying to hurt each other at that point.
Caroline kept trying to get Teresa to listen, but then Melissa got her big line in: "I'm the victim!" Um, no you're not. No one is. Here's what bugs me. No one put a gun to any of these ladies' heads and made them get on this show. However, they signed on the dotted line and agreed to put their personal business on television because it's a platform and a way to make money. No problem. But when you know things are not good in your family (I'm looking at you, Melissa) and you decide to go on the same reality show as the sister-in-law that you're fighting with, whatever happens happens. You are not a victim. You knew that Teresa was not going to be happy about you being on the show (and it doesn't matter if you told her you were coming on or not). And Teresa, you knew it wasn't just your show. It's an ensemble cast and the producers can cast whoever they want. It's not your deal. You are the breakout star, absolutely. But if you didn't like it, you could have walked off and had your fans follow you to your next venture, which they gladly would have done. So, in my opinion, there are no victims here. I feel that Melissa and Teresa both value their place on this show and the platform it gives them way more than they value their relationship. Neither one will give up their place on the RHONJ cast willingly. And that's sad, because they both need to leave and get professional help immediately.
I don't think Teresa has as much of a problem with Kathy as she does with Melissa. She clearly doesn't get along with Kathy, but it's not an all out war like it is with Melissa. I thought it was a smart move on Kathy's part to apologize for calling Teresa's mother a liar. She knew it was wrong and apologized for it right then and there. I respect that. If you don't, hey, we can agree to disagree on that. I found it interesting how, after Kathy apologized, Teresa started to give her a hard time, then quickly decided against it and went back to the other couch, saying "this means I accept". It was a very intriguing exchange that went on there because Teresa got quiet and sat down and it looked like she had forgiven Kathy, but it wasn't long before they were bickering again.
We learned that Caroline and Dina are still not talking (which makes it a year or so, right?) and Caroline tried to show Teresa the similarities in their situations. Now, Dina was on one episode and she didn't say anything too terrible about Caroline that I can remember. Maybe it was the whole "maybe blood isn't thicker than water" line? If so, that's nothing. The Gorga/Giudice feud has lasted the entire season, plus the season before. So, it really isn't the same, but nice try, Caroline. I don't even think Dina is that angry at you. It just sounds like she doesn't want to bother with you right now. Which is hurtful, don't get me wrong. But you're not flinging insults and accusations back and forth. Be grateful it hasn't gotten that bad yet and stop talking about it. Dina will talk to you when she's good and ready.
Teresa is insisting throughout the whole episode that Melissa and Kathy came on the show to destroy her and/or hurt her. Here's my take on that. Melissa admitted she came on because it was an opportunity and I think Melissa saw it as a way to become famous. If she pisses off Teresa in the process, fine, she's ok with that because there's no love lost there. Now, with Kathy, I honestly don't think she meant to hurt anyone. She tried to make up with Teresa all last season and this entire season, and it was only on this reunion that she's openly fighting with Teresa and not holding back at all. Last reunion, she was trying to reason with Teresa but it didn't work. So now, I guess, it's game on. But, let's be honest, none of us can read minds or hearts so we just go by what we see on TV, which is a fraction of what's really going on in real life. Am I the only one that's kind of embarrassed that we care so much about a show that is literally a thin slice of people's lives that we don't know and will probably never meet or have a cup of coffee with??? ... Moving on ...
Is Caroline a bully? As I stated before, none of these ladies are victims, so the reasonable answer is no. Caroline had enough of Teresa and didn't hide it. It wasn't nice, and it wasn't fun to watch, but in my opinion, it wasn't bullying. Teresa defends herself and fights back, and also, let's not forget, has no problem telling other people off, getting in their face, grabbing their face, screaming at them, calling them names, flipping tables, talking about them behind their back, etc. It's all very unattractive, but it's not bullying. So, when Andy brings it up, Caroline asks Teresa to give her one instance where she bullied her and of course, Teresa can't come up with an answer. Because there is none. Teresa stammers and finally says, the whole season. But nothing specific. So she backtracks and says the viewers have been saying it all season. How's the view from under that bus, viewers??? Teresa then clarifies that magazines have said it, and that Caroline did bully her, but it didn't affect her. She added that Caroline has done a lot of things to her, but again, nothing specific. Teresa finally settles on the fact that Caroline didn't accept her apology. Which, come on, is not bullying. I mean, what about all the lectures and the unsolicited advice?! That's something, at least! The truth is, Caroline wanted nothing to do with Teresa and she said so to her face. Teresa said as much back to Caroline. That's a pretty fair fight. No victims, no bullies. Like I said before, Teresa gives as good as she gets, and in Napa, she and Caroline were equally matched. Teresa went to her room and called Caroline some names, which Caroline was more than happy to bring up on this episode. I did enjoy Caroline telling Teresa to stop being a brick wall and listen - because Teresa does have a wall up. And it's definitely a defense mechanism, but there's a time and a place for a defense mechanism. They're not supposed to be permanent.
Speaking of Napa, let's talk about Joe Giudice. I know, I don't want to, either. But it was a big part of the episode, so we kind of have to. Joe Giudice recited, I mean gave his explanation about who he was talking to in Napa and I still don't buy it. Even after he heard the conversation again (complete with perverted grunting and giggling) he still says it was his coworker. Bullshit. Then, in a real classy move, he thanks Andy for showing the call on TV, and says it cost him a lot. A lot, meaning jewelry for Teresa because, get this: they fought for three days about it. As opposed to ... actually taking responsibility for his actions. So, he essentially said he bought his way out of the problem and Teresa just sits there with a smile on her face. Melissa was right on when she said "and I'm the gold digger?" but I wish she would have said it louder, because Teresa needed to hear that. I'm sorry, and I am not married, but I would be completely mortified if my husband forgot he had a mic on because he was so plastered off wine and called me a C word to his mistress. No amount of diamonds in the world could fix that for me. But, according to Teresa everything is fine. Everything is not fine, Teresa. I have said this a million times. Joe Giudice is the problem. I know it doesn't fit the image you want to put out there, but he is the problem. I'll stop there.
Now, here's where Jacqueline comes in. Andy asks the ladies if they've ever heard Joe Giudice call Teresa names. So, at first, Jacqueline is hesitant but hints at it for sure. And in a classic case of opening a can of worms, Teresa says that Chris cheated on Jacqueline and that's why Jacqueline can't trust him. You can almost see the steam coming out of Jacqueline at that point. It was effective the first time, but Teresa can't help herself so she says it like eight more times. That's when Jacqueline loses it. She spills the tea about Joe cheating numerous times and here's a surprise, Danielle saying she was hanging out with Joe Giudice and he was with a stripper all night. Jeez Louise, for someone who's not on the show anymore, Danielle certainly gets her camera time. I, personally, take everything and anything Danielle says with a grain of salt, but she was right about Melissa being in contact with her, so anything is possible. But let's be real, if Teresa had said the Chris thing once and let it go, Jacqueline probably wouldn't have blown up, but I think Teresa wanted to provoke her. And provoke her, she did. So when Jacqueline started saying how Mr. and Mrs. Giudice enjoy calling each other names and punching each other, my jaw pretty much hit the floor. What the hell is going on here???
This is why I say they need a whole new cast. With this kind of history, how can we ever hope for a show where these women can interact in a social setting without bloodshed??? We can't.
I hate to do this but we have to go back to Melissa and Teresa for a second. The sing-off was one of the lighter-ish moments in this shitshow, so you know I have to talk about it. Melissa has a decent voice and Teresa wasn't terrible, but you could tell she was imitating what she thinks Melissa sounds like. Then, the cookbook scandal - who's cooking those dishes that Teresa tweets a picture of? Again, I'm blocked, so ... you know ... But I have to say I laughed out loud when Melissa said "You want me to sing the whole damn song?" Like, bitch, please! And I knew what Teresa was getting at - sing the whole song so we can hear what you really sound like. I get it. But who really cares? The singing is not the issue and neither are the tweets about meals Teresa's mom may or may not have prepared.
The issue is: Teresa and Melissa love fighting with each other. I can definitely see how much they enjoy it. When Melissa was going after Teresa for talking about her marriage while Joe Giudice was there, she and Teresa were going back and forth and all of a sudden, Melissa says "You wanna play?" in this almost evil voice and it caught my attention. I mean, who says that? I can see Melissa engaging Teresa in a fight right there. And it was totally unnecessary. Then, Teresa does her whole taunting routine where she squeals and smiles and makes herself look like a crazy person. And the "thank God" moment??? Can we talk about this??? Teresa, what were you thinking?! You have to get off this show. You're officially a stunt queen. That whole bowing down thing was odd, and slightly frightening. It wasn't funny and if you thought it was, I just feel awful for you. Because it wasn't.
We have to move on to the arm grab. Teresa was saying Melissa dated Joe Gorga's best friend, and Melissa grabbed Teresa's arm. She didn't pull it out of its socket, but Teresa was quick to say she would press charges. Of course, that prompted Kathy to remind Teresa that she grabbed her face in Napa and no charges were filed. Seriously, ladies? Teresa, you of all people have no place getting upset about someone touching you, since you're the queen of getting inappropriate when you're mad. Melissa, you should have known better than to give Teresa something to use against you. Melissa then stated that Teresa wishes she had a marriage like the Gorgas (um, no thanks). No shade, but shade. Then Danielle was brought up again, regarding when Melissa actually spoke to her. Before the Season 2 Reunion? After? Oh, who cares anymore? She talked to her, end of story. Melissa claims that Danielle did not get her on the show. Which I believe. Because Danielle getting Melissa on the show is like someone getting fired, then hiring their own replacement. But hey, stranger things have happened on Bravo.
And here we are again, the central issue. Teresa will never get over the fact that Melissa and Kathy are on the show with her. The truth is, the thrill is gone, ladies. Teresa, you have a shitload of fans that will support you in whatever you pursue. You say that if the situation were reversed, you would have found a different show to be on ... we'll never know. We just have to take your word for it. As for Kathy saying you have a little team of crazies ... I'll just say this. You have a lot of fans. 90% are lovely people who I have absolutely an awesome time chatting with on Twitter. The other 10% are the kind that will be mean to anyone who doesn't fawn all over you and agree with everything you do. I don't agree with everything you do, and I never will. So, that 10% can continue to call me names on Twitter. I can take it.
I want to briefly talk about Watch What Happens Live last night with my girl, Wendy Williams. I'll just do a lightning round for you:
1. Teresa needs to leave the show - agree
2. Joe Giudice is lying - agree
3. No one will watch Teresa's cooking show - disagree, her fans will follow her, believe that!
And a special shout out to Mustang Sally for calling in to the After Show!!!
I have to make one more point, and that is, I honestly don't think Andy has it out for Teresa at all. Some of her fans believe he's too hard on her and is purposely trying to make her look bad. I don't think this is true. It's not in Andy's best interest to alienate anyone on these shows. It's in his best interest to keep the most entertaining people on the show in order to boost ratings. The decisions regarding casting involve more people than just Andy - he is not the entire network. Don't get me wrong, I am upset with the network powers-that-be that decided to hack up the season and mish-mash it back together again. But Andy doesn't work alone. So, I'm cutting him some slack. Andy and the Bravo team saved RHONY from the brink of disaster, and I'm hoping they'll do the same with RHONJ. But if not, we can always watch something else.
One more Reunion episode to go, kids!
Let me know what you think - Tweet me!
We begin where we left off, with Rosie. Now, we know from Watch What Happens Live last night that none of the ladies could hear exactly what Rosie was saying backstage, so I'm curious to know what Teresa is saying about her tongue being threatened. (I can't check her tweets because I'm blocked. Have I mentioned this?) Lauren Manzo spoke to Rosie backstage and did a great job of getting her to calm down. I was actually very impressed. Once Rosie was on the couch, she was relatively calm. She and Teresa got into it for a moment regarding Teresa's claims that Kathy was upset about Rosie's sexuality. Now, we all know Teresa isn't good with timelines, or listening, so Rosie had to reiterate a couple of times that Kathy had a problem with Rosie's girlfriend at the time, not the fact that she was gay. I wanted to know more about this wrong path Rosie's girlfriend was leading her towards, but they didn't go into it. Suffice to say, Rosie checked Teresa by saying she was projecting her own point of view onto Kathy. Teresa denied it and said even Joe Giudice invited Rosie to hang out with them, which Rosie denied. Bottom line: I think Teresa accepts Rosie, just like Kathy does. You can see that Kathy and Rosie are close, and like Rosie said, they have a bond no one can break. All in all, that segment ended on a peaceful note.
Caroline really surprised me in a good way when she put her own problems with Teresa aside and tried to get her to stop going at it with Kathy before Rosie came on the set. She kept saying, "This is wrong!", and she was absolutely right. It had gone way too far, and it needed to stop. Even Andy said they were just trying to hurt each other at that point.
Caroline kept trying to get Teresa to listen, but then Melissa got her big line in: "I'm the victim!" Um, no you're not. No one is. Here's what bugs me. No one put a gun to any of these ladies' heads and made them get on this show. However, they signed on the dotted line and agreed to put their personal business on television because it's a platform and a way to make money. No problem. But when you know things are not good in your family (I'm looking at you, Melissa) and you decide to go on the same reality show as the sister-in-law that you're fighting with, whatever happens happens. You are not a victim. You knew that Teresa was not going to be happy about you being on the show (and it doesn't matter if you told her you were coming on or not). And Teresa, you knew it wasn't just your show. It's an ensemble cast and the producers can cast whoever they want. It's not your deal. You are the breakout star, absolutely. But if you didn't like it, you could have walked off and had your fans follow you to your next venture, which they gladly would have done. So, in my opinion, there are no victims here. I feel that Melissa and Teresa both value their place on this show and the platform it gives them way more than they value their relationship. Neither one will give up their place on the RHONJ cast willingly. And that's sad, because they both need to leave and get professional help immediately.
I don't think Teresa has as much of a problem with Kathy as she does with Melissa. She clearly doesn't get along with Kathy, but it's not an all out war like it is with Melissa. I thought it was a smart move on Kathy's part to apologize for calling Teresa's mother a liar. She knew it was wrong and apologized for it right then and there. I respect that. If you don't, hey, we can agree to disagree on that. I found it interesting how, after Kathy apologized, Teresa started to give her a hard time, then quickly decided against it and went back to the other couch, saying "this means I accept". It was a very intriguing exchange that went on there because Teresa got quiet and sat down and it looked like she had forgiven Kathy, but it wasn't long before they were bickering again.
We learned that Caroline and Dina are still not talking (which makes it a year or so, right?) and Caroline tried to show Teresa the similarities in their situations. Now, Dina was on one episode and she didn't say anything too terrible about Caroline that I can remember. Maybe it was the whole "maybe blood isn't thicker than water" line? If so, that's nothing. The Gorga/Giudice feud has lasted the entire season, plus the season before. So, it really isn't the same, but nice try, Caroline. I don't even think Dina is that angry at you. It just sounds like she doesn't want to bother with you right now. Which is hurtful, don't get me wrong. But you're not flinging insults and accusations back and forth. Be grateful it hasn't gotten that bad yet and stop talking about it. Dina will talk to you when she's good and ready.
Teresa is insisting throughout the whole episode that Melissa and Kathy came on the show to destroy her and/or hurt her. Here's my take on that. Melissa admitted she came on because it was an opportunity and I think Melissa saw it as a way to become famous. If she pisses off Teresa in the process, fine, she's ok with that because there's no love lost there. Now, with Kathy, I honestly don't think she meant to hurt anyone. She tried to make up with Teresa all last season and this entire season, and it was only on this reunion that she's openly fighting with Teresa and not holding back at all. Last reunion, she was trying to reason with Teresa but it didn't work. So now, I guess, it's game on. But, let's be honest, none of us can read minds or hearts so we just go by what we see on TV, which is a fraction of what's really going on in real life. Am I the only one that's kind of embarrassed that we care so much about a show that is literally a thin slice of people's lives that we don't know and will probably never meet or have a cup of coffee with??? ... Moving on ...
Is Caroline a bully? As I stated before, none of these ladies are victims, so the reasonable answer is no. Caroline had enough of Teresa and didn't hide it. It wasn't nice, and it wasn't fun to watch, but in my opinion, it wasn't bullying. Teresa defends herself and fights back, and also, let's not forget, has no problem telling other people off, getting in their face, grabbing their face, screaming at them, calling them names, flipping tables, talking about them behind their back, etc. It's all very unattractive, but it's not bullying. So, when Andy brings it up, Caroline asks Teresa to give her one instance where she bullied her and of course, Teresa can't come up with an answer. Because there is none. Teresa stammers and finally says, the whole season. But nothing specific. So she backtracks and says the viewers have been saying it all season. How's the view from under that bus, viewers??? Teresa then clarifies that magazines have said it, and that Caroline did bully her, but it didn't affect her. She added that Caroline has done a lot of things to her, but again, nothing specific. Teresa finally settles on the fact that Caroline didn't accept her apology. Which, come on, is not bullying. I mean, what about all the lectures and the unsolicited advice?! That's something, at least! The truth is, Caroline wanted nothing to do with Teresa and she said so to her face. Teresa said as much back to Caroline. That's a pretty fair fight. No victims, no bullies. Like I said before, Teresa gives as good as she gets, and in Napa, she and Caroline were equally matched. Teresa went to her room and called Caroline some names, which Caroline was more than happy to bring up on this episode. I did enjoy Caroline telling Teresa to stop being a brick wall and listen - because Teresa does have a wall up. And it's definitely a defense mechanism, but there's a time and a place for a defense mechanism. They're not supposed to be permanent.
Speaking of Napa, let's talk about Joe Giudice. I know, I don't want to, either. But it was a big part of the episode, so we kind of have to. Joe Giudice recited, I mean gave his explanation about who he was talking to in Napa and I still don't buy it. Even after he heard the conversation again (complete with perverted grunting and giggling) he still says it was his coworker. Bullshit. Then, in a real classy move, he thanks Andy for showing the call on TV, and says it cost him a lot. A lot, meaning jewelry for Teresa because, get this: they fought for three days about it. As opposed to ... actually taking responsibility for his actions. So, he essentially said he bought his way out of the problem and Teresa just sits there with a smile on her face. Melissa was right on when she said "and I'm the gold digger?" but I wish she would have said it louder, because Teresa needed to hear that. I'm sorry, and I am not married, but I would be completely mortified if my husband forgot he had a mic on because he was so plastered off wine and called me a C word to his mistress. No amount of diamonds in the world could fix that for me. But, according to Teresa everything is fine. Everything is not fine, Teresa. I have said this a million times. Joe Giudice is the problem. I know it doesn't fit the image you want to put out there, but he is the problem. I'll stop there.
Now, here's where Jacqueline comes in. Andy asks the ladies if they've ever heard Joe Giudice call Teresa names. So, at first, Jacqueline is hesitant but hints at it for sure. And in a classic case of opening a can of worms, Teresa says that Chris cheated on Jacqueline and that's why Jacqueline can't trust him. You can almost see the steam coming out of Jacqueline at that point. It was effective the first time, but Teresa can't help herself so she says it like eight more times. That's when Jacqueline loses it. She spills the tea about Joe cheating numerous times and here's a surprise, Danielle saying she was hanging out with Joe Giudice and he was with a stripper all night. Jeez Louise, for someone who's not on the show anymore, Danielle certainly gets her camera time. I, personally, take everything and anything Danielle says with a grain of salt, but she was right about Melissa being in contact with her, so anything is possible. But let's be real, if Teresa had said the Chris thing once and let it go, Jacqueline probably wouldn't have blown up, but I think Teresa wanted to provoke her. And provoke her, she did. So when Jacqueline started saying how Mr. and Mrs. Giudice enjoy calling each other names and punching each other, my jaw pretty much hit the floor. What the hell is going on here???
This is why I say they need a whole new cast. With this kind of history, how can we ever hope for a show where these women can interact in a social setting without bloodshed??? We can't.
I hate to do this but we have to go back to Melissa and Teresa for a second. The sing-off was one of the lighter-ish moments in this shitshow, so you know I have to talk about it. Melissa has a decent voice and Teresa wasn't terrible, but you could tell she was imitating what she thinks Melissa sounds like. Then, the cookbook scandal - who's cooking those dishes that Teresa tweets a picture of? Again, I'm blocked, so ... you know ... But I have to say I laughed out loud when Melissa said "You want me to sing the whole damn song?" Like, bitch, please! And I knew what Teresa was getting at - sing the whole song so we can hear what you really sound like. I get it. But who really cares? The singing is not the issue and neither are the tweets about meals Teresa's mom may or may not have prepared.
The issue is: Teresa and Melissa love fighting with each other. I can definitely see how much they enjoy it. When Melissa was going after Teresa for talking about her marriage while Joe Giudice was there, she and Teresa were going back and forth and all of a sudden, Melissa says "You wanna play?" in this almost evil voice and it caught my attention. I mean, who says that? I can see Melissa engaging Teresa in a fight right there. And it was totally unnecessary. Then, Teresa does her whole taunting routine where she squeals and smiles and makes herself look like a crazy person. And the "thank God" moment??? Can we talk about this??? Teresa, what were you thinking?! You have to get off this show. You're officially a stunt queen. That whole bowing down thing was odd, and slightly frightening. It wasn't funny and if you thought it was, I just feel awful for you. Because it wasn't.
We have to move on to the arm grab. Teresa was saying Melissa dated Joe Gorga's best friend, and Melissa grabbed Teresa's arm. She didn't pull it out of its socket, but Teresa was quick to say she would press charges. Of course, that prompted Kathy to remind Teresa that she grabbed her face in Napa and no charges were filed. Seriously, ladies? Teresa, you of all people have no place getting upset about someone touching you, since you're the queen of getting inappropriate when you're mad. Melissa, you should have known better than to give Teresa something to use against you. Melissa then stated that Teresa wishes she had a marriage like the Gorgas (um, no thanks). No shade, but shade. Then Danielle was brought up again, regarding when Melissa actually spoke to her. Before the Season 2 Reunion? After? Oh, who cares anymore? She talked to her, end of story. Melissa claims that Danielle did not get her on the show. Which I believe. Because Danielle getting Melissa on the show is like someone getting fired, then hiring their own replacement. But hey, stranger things have happened on Bravo.
And here we are again, the central issue. Teresa will never get over the fact that Melissa and Kathy are on the show with her. The truth is, the thrill is gone, ladies. Teresa, you have a shitload of fans that will support you in whatever you pursue. You say that if the situation were reversed, you would have found a different show to be on ... we'll never know. We just have to take your word for it. As for Kathy saying you have a little team of crazies ... I'll just say this. You have a lot of fans. 90% are lovely people who I have absolutely an awesome time chatting with on Twitter. The other 10% are the kind that will be mean to anyone who doesn't fawn all over you and agree with everything you do. I don't agree with everything you do, and I never will. So, that 10% can continue to call me names on Twitter. I can take it.
I want to briefly talk about Watch What Happens Live last night with my girl, Wendy Williams. I'll just do a lightning round for you:
1. Teresa needs to leave the show - agree
2. Joe Giudice is lying - agree
3. No one will watch Teresa's cooking show - disagree, her fans will follow her, believe that!
And a special shout out to Mustang Sally for calling in to the After Show!!!
I have to make one more point, and that is, I honestly don't think Andy has it out for Teresa at all. Some of her fans believe he's too hard on her and is purposely trying to make her look bad. I don't think this is true. It's not in Andy's best interest to alienate anyone on these shows. It's in his best interest to keep the most entertaining people on the show in order to boost ratings. The decisions regarding casting involve more people than just Andy - he is not the entire network. Don't get me wrong, I am upset with the network powers-that-be that decided to hack up the season and mish-mash it back together again. But Andy doesn't work alone. So, I'm cutting him some slack. Andy and the Bravo team saved RHONY from the brink of disaster, and I'm hoping they'll do the same with RHONJ. But if not, we can always watch something else.
One more Reunion episode to go, kids!
Let me know what you think - Tweet me!
Wednesday, September 12, 2012
Out of Order
I'm not going to blog about Watch What Happens Live every week, but Sunday's episode with Perez Hilton and Teresa Giudice warrants a blog.
Here's why:
Teresa said Joe Giudice was talking to his driver on the phone in the Napa episode where he called her a "bitch" and another disgusting word I won't repeat. Then she said he was talking to a worker. Oh my God. Can we say "DENIAL"??? Let's be real. He was NOT talking to his driver or a worker or anyone work-related. That was clearly a conversation with a woman. His tone, his choice of words, all of it points to the fact that it was a woman on the other end of that phone call. And I have a big problem with her stating that it was anyone other than a woman because the fact is - she has no idea who it was. None of us do. Joe Giudice is not going to tell her the truth, so she shouldn't have said anything about it. Now, she looks terribly dumb for believing her husband A) couldn't remember calling her those names and B) somehow remembers exactly who he was talking to at the time. Come the f*ck on. And, to top it off, she says he "made up for it" with diamonds. Barf. Teresa, why must you infuriate me so???
I was glad to see Perez apologize to Sarah Jessica Parker as requested by Andy because he was really brutal with her back in the day. I think Perez does see where he was wrong in the past, and he has changed his website a lot. It is still gossip, but not nearly as mean-spirited as before. I like that Andy had him on and they were able to have a good conversation even though they don't see eye to eye on everything. See, this is how adults behave.
Back to Teresa. She was slamming Lauren and Al Manzo for having lap band surgery while congratulating Perez on losing weight naturally. Period. It was a "joke", but again, it was clearly a dig at people that she's no longer friends with. WHY??? Why even go there??? Why not just congratulate Perez and leave it at that? This is exactly why people can't stand Teresa. The horse is dead and buried and she digs it up and beats it again. Get over the Manzos, Teresa. Stop talking about them and then pretending you didn't - we've all been to high school. This kind of bullsh*t just shows that you're still not 100% over the Manzos and you will continue to slam them every chance you get. Not very mature, huh?
The After Show was not great, but if you want to check it out, here you go.
And a quick note about the Real Housewives of New Jersey: Bravo, WTF??? How dare you show these shows out of order and purposely give the audience a skewed view of how all of these events unfolded??? How are we supposed to have a clear picture of the cast when you deliberately air portions of footage that happened out of sequence? This is not fair to your cast or your audience. We deserve to see things as they truly happened, not in the order that best serves your "storylines". This is crazy. And if you continue to shoot/film/air the show like you did this season, I cannot and will not watch.
What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!
Here's why:
Teresa said Joe Giudice was talking to his driver on the phone in the Napa episode where he called her a "bitch" and another disgusting word I won't repeat. Then she said he was talking to a worker. Oh my God. Can we say "DENIAL"??? Let's be real. He was NOT talking to his driver or a worker or anyone work-related. That was clearly a conversation with a woman. His tone, his choice of words, all of it points to the fact that it was a woman on the other end of that phone call. And I have a big problem with her stating that it was anyone other than a woman because the fact is - she has no idea who it was. None of us do. Joe Giudice is not going to tell her the truth, so she shouldn't have said anything about it. Now, she looks terribly dumb for believing her husband A) couldn't remember calling her those names and B) somehow remembers exactly who he was talking to at the time. Come the f*ck on. And, to top it off, she says he "made up for it" with diamonds. Barf. Teresa, why must you infuriate me so???
I was glad to see Perez apologize to Sarah Jessica Parker as requested by Andy because he was really brutal with her back in the day. I think Perez does see where he was wrong in the past, and he has changed his website a lot. It is still gossip, but not nearly as mean-spirited as before. I like that Andy had him on and they were able to have a good conversation even though they don't see eye to eye on everything. See, this is how adults behave.
Back to Teresa. She was slamming Lauren and Al Manzo for having lap band surgery while congratulating Perez on losing weight naturally. Period. It was a "joke", but again, it was clearly a dig at people that she's no longer friends with. WHY??? Why even go there??? Why not just congratulate Perez and leave it at that? This is exactly why people can't stand Teresa. The horse is dead and buried and she digs it up and beats it again. Get over the Manzos, Teresa. Stop talking about them and then pretending you didn't - we've all been to high school. This kind of bullsh*t just shows that you're still not 100% over the Manzos and you will continue to slam them every chance you get. Not very mature, huh?
The After Show was not great, but if you want to check it out, here you go.
And a quick note about the Real Housewives of New Jersey: Bravo, WTF??? How dare you show these shows out of order and purposely give the audience a skewed view of how all of these events unfolded??? How are we supposed to have a clear picture of the cast when you deliberately air portions of footage that happened out of sequence? This is not fair to your cast or your audience. We deserve to see things as they truly happened, not in the order that best serves your "storylines". This is crazy. And if you continue to shoot/film/air the show like you did this season, I cannot and will not watch.
What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!
Monday, August 20, 2012
Un-f*cking-necessary
Ok, so I just finished watching last night's Real Housewives of New Jersey episode, and I'm pretty much livid. With one Joe Giudice. Here's the thing. We get that you're "rough around the edges", we even get that you say some inappropriate things and get drunk and chip your tooth while doing gymnastics in the living room. You're an odd duck! We get it. But you were either so drunk, or so careless (I don't know which is worse) that you took that call WHILE WEARING A MICROPHONE AND WHILE BEING FILMED. You're an idiot. You're rude, insensitive, selfish, and mean. You're miserable and you use alcohol and insults to cover it up. Well, the cat's out of the bag. It's officially out there. And I never want to see you on my television ever again. Now, let's address the ladies.
Caroline: I was really happy for you when the kids were toasting you for your birthday. That was really sweet and it was a very nice surprise dinner. Any mom would love that kind of celebration. I wasn't too crazy about how you kept harping on the whole Teresa thing with Kathy and Jacqueline. The bottom line is: Teresa was on the trip and everyone was dealing with her in their own way. Like Chris said, you choose not to have anything to do with her. Fine. It's time to stop talking about it. But, of course, you don't stop and next week we get to see round 2 between you and Teresa. Not that I'm looking forward to it. Also, the Giudices, Wakiles, and Gorgas should have never been at the business meeting in the first place. It was Chris' mistake to ask them to come. If it was really a business meeting, then it should have been only for those who were involved in the business part of the trip. To be honest, Caroline, I think you're done on this show. Think about it. You can't get past this hatred you have for Teresa, and for the record, you are completely free to hate her, it's your business. But this show is never going to get out of this dysfunctional cycle because there is just too much animosity between you and Teresa. And it sucks. It pulls the whole show down. For example, Teresa's toast. It's ok to be upset about it for Kathy's sake, but you were overly outraged about it. It's almost as if you take any excuse to be mad at Teresa and just run with it, even if it has nothing to do with you. It's frustrating because I think there's a lot of great sides to you. But all we're seeing now is the side that hates Teresa. And that's a drag. I've said it before. This show isn't for you anymore. Caroline's grade for the week: D (because she's allowing her feelings toward Teresa turn her into something we don't like).
Jacqueline: We didn't hear much from you on this episode, so I'll keep it brief. I must say, you really thought you were getting back to a good place with Teresa. It sucks to know exactly how your friendship with her actually ends up. Damn Bravo for filming so soon and airing the season so late. I'll never forgive them for this jacked up season. I liked seeing you laugh and have fun, and if you do come back next season, that's exactly what I want to see from you. The scene where you were doing Teresa's hair felt like we were back in season one. Jacqueline's grade for this week: A (because at this point, she was doing her part and keeping things in a good place).
Kathy: You know I love you, but when it comes to Teresa - you cannot take her seriously. In this case, I agree with Richie, what comes out of her mouth most of the time is complete nonsense. I really don't think she meant to leave you out of the toast intentionally, to be honest. I think she just wanted to acknowledge a few people at the table. It would have been different if she said something about every single person and then decided to not say anything about you. Would it have been nice if she had said something nice to you in her toast? Absolutely! But that's giving Teresa way too much credit. We all know Teresa is all about Teresa. And what was in her head at that moment was exactly what she said. End of story. I really don't think there was any malice behind it. I will say, you handled it well. You didn't throw a fit, you didn't turn and scream at her, you just went on about your business. Which is the best way to handle Teresa. Because you know if you would have started a fight, she wouldn't have listened to a word you said. So, you're smart to be the bigger person. However, like I said before, I don't think she did it on purpose. But it hurt your feelings and you have a right to feel how you feel. Now, next week, I hope you don't let her put her hands on you ... you better stand up for yourself and let her know where she can go. Kathy's grade for the week: C (for keeping calm at the table but she should not have let Teresa's toast get to her).
Melissa: You were shady this week! You were throwing shade left and right! And I enjoyed it, to be quite honest. It made me laugh, sue me. I could tell you were joking about the sex tape thing, but I can see how comments like that don't win you any points with Teresa. Granted, you were absolutely right about her giving interviews in magazines and then being shocked when people ask her about her personal life. But the sex tape/fame whore comment was a low blow (no pun intended). Teresa's definitely hustling to make money and capitalizing on her small degree of fame, but what you said wasn't cool. Joke or no joke. And let's be real, no one wants to see that. Ever. Melissa's grade for the week: C (for the excellent shade, but she went too far with some of her comments).
Teresa: First of all, I'm so sorry you have to see your husband's phone conversation on this week's episode, I can't imagine how devastating that was to watch. His comments about you were completely unnecessary and out of line. I can't believe he would speak about you that way to anyone. I truly feel for you right now. And what makes it even worse for me is that you tried to seduce him in the vineyards after that and he called you a whore. To your face. I don't know how that's supposed to be ok, because it's not. I hate the way he talks to you. I can see you trying to force him into being happy - you're asking him to smile for the picture, telling him to make love in the vineyard, etc. He's not happy, Tre. He's miserable. And you don't have to take it. In your blog this week, you seemed really sincere (it actually sounded like you), and you say that you didn't know about the phone conversation until you saw the episode. You also say Joe has apologized. But, he didn't tell you about it - you had to watch the show to find out. You know what Joe is sorry about? He's sorry he got caught. He's sorry he forgot he had a mic on when he called you a bitch and that other disgusting name and he's sorry you found out about it. Worse, he's sorry you heard him obviously talking to another woman and he's sorry you saw him lie to your face about it. Teresa - you know I'm not your biggest fan, but as a woman, I am begging you. Get out. Immediately. You don't need this bullsh*t. And I've told you in this blog more times than I can remember that Joe Giudice is the biggest problem in your life. He is the poison in your life right now. You can obviously get along with people and forgive and forget. Look at the progress you made with Melissa. Now, it's time to stand up and walk away. That's how I see it. As for the toast, I don't think you meant to leave Kathy out. Like I told her, I think you were focused on certain people at the table and that was the extent of it. I do think you're selfish and I do think you're all about yourself. And truthfully, that's not even always a bad thing. The problem is, you're on the defense with Kathy (and still bringing up the recipe bullsh*t) and you're on the defense with Caroline. It's time to stop fighting, Teresa. And the first step is getting away from the person who encourages you to fight with everyone. Have you ever stopped to think that maybe the reason Joe encourages you to fight with people is so that then you'll be too distracted to catch him doing his dirt? Just saying. Teresa's grade for the week: N/A (because at this point, I feel like Teresa is drowning and just trying to stay above water - in an ocean full of negativity called Joe Giudice).
What do you think of this episode? Tweet me!
Caroline: I was really happy for you when the kids were toasting you for your birthday. That was really sweet and it was a very nice surprise dinner. Any mom would love that kind of celebration. I wasn't too crazy about how you kept harping on the whole Teresa thing with Kathy and Jacqueline. The bottom line is: Teresa was on the trip and everyone was dealing with her in their own way. Like Chris said, you choose not to have anything to do with her. Fine. It's time to stop talking about it. But, of course, you don't stop and next week we get to see round 2 between you and Teresa. Not that I'm looking forward to it. Also, the Giudices, Wakiles, and Gorgas should have never been at the business meeting in the first place. It was Chris' mistake to ask them to come. If it was really a business meeting, then it should have been only for those who were involved in the business part of the trip. To be honest, Caroline, I think you're done on this show. Think about it. You can't get past this hatred you have for Teresa, and for the record, you are completely free to hate her, it's your business. But this show is never going to get out of this dysfunctional cycle because there is just too much animosity between you and Teresa. And it sucks. It pulls the whole show down. For example, Teresa's toast. It's ok to be upset about it for Kathy's sake, but you were overly outraged about it. It's almost as if you take any excuse to be mad at Teresa and just run with it, even if it has nothing to do with you. It's frustrating because I think there's a lot of great sides to you. But all we're seeing now is the side that hates Teresa. And that's a drag. I've said it before. This show isn't for you anymore. Caroline's grade for the week: D (because she's allowing her feelings toward Teresa turn her into something we don't like).
Jacqueline: We didn't hear much from you on this episode, so I'll keep it brief. I must say, you really thought you were getting back to a good place with Teresa. It sucks to know exactly how your friendship with her actually ends up. Damn Bravo for filming so soon and airing the season so late. I'll never forgive them for this jacked up season. I liked seeing you laugh and have fun, and if you do come back next season, that's exactly what I want to see from you. The scene where you were doing Teresa's hair felt like we were back in season one. Jacqueline's grade for this week: A (because at this point, she was doing her part and keeping things in a good place).
Kathy: You know I love you, but when it comes to Teresa - you cannot take her seriously. In this case, I agree with Richie, what comes out of her mouth most of the time is complete nonsense. I really don't think she meant to leave you out of the toast intentionally, to be honest. I think she just wanted to acknowledge a few people at the table. It would have been different if she said something about every single person and then decided to not say anything about you. Would it have been nice if she had said something nice to you in her toast? Absolutely! But that's giving Teresa way too much credit. We all know Teresa is all about Teresa. And what was in her head at that moment was exactly what she said. End of story. I really don't think there was any malice behind it. I will say, you handled it well. You didn't throw a fit, you didn't turn and scream at her, you just went on about your business. Which is the best way to handle Teresa. Because you know if you would have started a fight, she wouldn't have listened to a word you said. So, you're smart to be the bigger person. However, like I said before, I don't think she did it on purpose. But it hurt your feelings and you have a right to feel how you feel. Now, next week, I hope you don't let her put her hands on you ... you better stand up for yourself and let her know where she can go. Kathy's grade for the week: C (for keeping calm at the table but she should not have let Teresa's toast get to her).
Melissa: You were shady this week! You were throwing shade left and right! And I enjoyed it, to be quite honest. It made me laugh, sue me. I could tell you were joking about the sex tape thing, but I can see how comments like that don't win you any points with Teresa. Granted, you were absolutely right about her giving interviews in magazines and then being shocked when people ask her about her personal life. But the sex tape/fame whore comment was a low blow (no pun intended). Teresa's definitely hustling to make money and capitalizing on her small degree of fame, but what you said wasn't cool. Joke or no joke. And let's be real, no one wants to see that. Ever. Melissa's grade for the week: C (for the excellent shade, but she went too far with some of her comments).
Teresa: First of all, I'm so sorry you have to see your husband's phone conversation on this week's episode, I can't imagine how devastating that was to watch. His comments about you were completely unnecessary and out of line. I can't believe he would speak about you that way to anyone. I truly feel for you right now. And what makes it even worse for me is that you tried to seduce him in the vineyards after that and he called you a whore. To your face. I don't know how that's supposed to be ok, because it's not. I hate the way he talks to you. I can see you trying to force him into being happy - you're asking him to smile for the picture, telling him to make love in the vineyard, etc. He's not happy, Tre. He's miserable. And you don't have to take it. In your blog this week, you seemed really sincere (it actually sounded like you), and you say that you didn't know about the phone conversation until you saw the episode. You also say Joe has apologized. But, he didn't tell you about it - you had to watch the show to find out. You know what Joe is sorry about? He's sorry he got caught. He's sorry he forgot he had a mic on when he called you a bitch and that other disgusting name and he's sorry you found out about it. Worse, he's sorry you heard him obviously talking to another woman and he's sorry you saw him lie to your face about it. Teresa - you know I'm not your biggest fan, but as a woman, I am begging you. Get out. Immediately. You don't need this bullsh*t. And I've told you in this blog more times than I can remember that Joe Giudice is the biggest problem in your life. He is the poison in your life right now. You can obviously get along with people and forgive and forget. Look at the progress you made with Melissa. Now, it's time to stand up and walk away. That's how I see it. As for the toast, I don't think you meant to leave Kathy out. Like I told her, I think you were focused on certain people at the table and that was the extent of it. I do think you're selfish and I do think you're all about yourself. And truthfully, that's not even always a bad thing. The problem is, you're on the defense with Kathy (and still bringing up the recipe bullsh*t) and you're on the defense with Caroline. It's time to stop fighting, Teresa. And the first step is getting away from the person who encourages you to fight with everyone. Have you ever stopped to think that maybe the reason Joe encourages you to fight with people is so that then you'll be too distracted to catch him doing his dirt? Just saying. Teresa's grade for the week: N/A (because at this point, I feel like Teresa is drowning and just trying to stay above water - in an ocean full of negativity called Joe Giudice).
What do you think of this episode? Tweet me!
Wednesday, July 25, 2012
I'm Over It
This one is going to be short and not so sweet, because, frankly, I'm sick of the Real Housewives of New Jersey. All of them. Get ready folks, and get your glasses, because I am about to READ!! And by the way, the grades are all the same this week: FAIL.
And as for the Housewives Husband Huddle, what a bunch of BS. Chris - if someone is talking about you and your businesses, just call them out on it and call it a day. Joe Gorga - return the man's tools. Joe Giudice - you are NOT perfect and your attitude sucks. Richie - decide whether you're the peacemaker or the potstirrer, because you can't be both.
Caroline: You were WAY out of line with your comments about Teresa's marriage. Now, your observations may not be totally inaccurate, but it was the way you expressed yourself and the look of almost pure joy on your face that worries me. I get that Teresa is annoying, and so is Joe Giudice, but do you have to look so happy while you curse their marriage? I know you have to talk about Teresa and Joe Giudice because you're on the same show and in the interviews/confessionals they ask you your opinion on them, but I definitely feel you could have controlled yourself and not gone to such an ugly place. The truth is, you don't like these people. We get it. But, you're supposed to be the mature, rational one, and you're just making things worse with comments like that. On the other hand, you say it like you mean it. Doesn't mean it's right, though. I just think about how you defend your own marriage and your family and fight so hard when people say negative things about you. Why attack someone else who's already got a target on her back? You did the impossible. You made me feel a smidge of sympathy for Teresa. You have to get over this hatred for her because it's making you look completely nuts.
Jacqueline: I am really tired of all the tabloid talk. I want you to never read one of those magazines again. Seriously. At the time this was taped, I do think you missed Teresa and wanted to be her friend again, but unfortunately, you and Teresa do not live on the same planet emotionally. You have to LET IT GO. I'm sick of seeing you cry for a friend that is clearly fine without you. It happens! Get over it! I hate to be so harsh, but damn! This storyline is so irritating now! I almost want you to blow up and get it over with, because this whole mad/sad/mad/sad business is maddening.
Kathy: I don't think you meant any harm with the cookie comments, let's face facts, they're FAMILY recipes. And you are related. You should know by now who you're dealing with. So, next time, just say "nice book" and get the hell out of dodge. It sucks that when you say ANYTHING even remotely not-kiss-assey to Teresa, she takes it as an insult. As her cousin, you know Teresa, and you know that she is a spoiled brat. Treat her like the child that she is, and be done with it. Please. No more nicey nice, no more awkward small talk, just be as civil as possible. She doesn't appreciate effort. She doesn't appreciate nice. So, treat her like an acquaintance. Some people like to be treated like sh*t - I know these people. The minute you ignore them, that's when they want to kiss your ass.
Melissa: The photo shoot was ok, but I would actually love to see you spend more time on your vocal training. I'm serious. If you worked half as hard on your voice as you do your looks, there would be no questions from anyone about your vocal abilities. Just saying. I have no problem with you wanting to pursue singing. I just think you need to take the SINGING part more seriously. We need to see you work with a vocal coach, we need to see you doing warm ups, we need to see you practice your breathing. If this is your career, you need to treat it as such, and not just a fun game you're playing. Do you know how many people are dying to have a chance to perform on tv? At Beatstock? Have their song on iTunes? Do better, Melissa.
Teresa: I'm getting on everyone this week, so do not be surprised that I'm coming for you right now. First of all, you need to know that not everything is about you all the time. So what Kathy said the cookies in your book were her mom's? You wrote the book! You know whose recipes they are! And is it really so hard to understand that your mom and her mom have the same recipe? Listen to Kathy's tone, it wasn't accusatory at all. Now, let's move on to your comments about Skinnygirl. So you don't like the way it tastes? Fine. Did you have to name it by name in your confessional? NO. Totally unnecessary. The Fabellini business, OMG, I was embarrassed for you. Why did you even bring Joe Giudice along? Nothing but negativity pours out of his mouth, and it's like you can't get enough. I'm tired of you being so defensive about everything. I'm tired of you projecting all of your bullsh*t onto everyone else. I'm tired of this storyline and I'm tired of you. Woman up! You spent the entire episode being mad. Is this how you want to live? And by the way, showing your toddler how to put money in her "bubbies" isn't helping you on this show either.
I am really tired of all the immature, high school idiocy that is happening on this show. If it continues, I cannot watch anymore. Next season better have a revamped cast, and honestly, I don't care who goes or stays at this point. Just fix it, because the show is dark, mean, and almost unwatchable. And I'm through.
Tweet me.
And as for the Housewives Husband Huddle, what a bunch of BS. Chris - if someone is talking about you and your businesses, just call them out on it and call it a day. Joe Gorga - return the man's tools. Joe Giudice - you are NOT perfect and your attitude sucks. Richie - decide whether you're the peacemaker or the potstirrer, because you can't be both.
Caroline: You were WAY out of line with your comments about Teresa's marriage. Now, your observations may not be totally inaccurate, but it was the way you expressed yourself and the look of almost pure joy on your face that worries me. I get that Teresa is annoying, and so is Joe Giudice, but do you have to look so happy while you curse their marriage? I know you have to talk about Teresa and Joe Giudice because you're on the same show and in the interviews/confessionals they ask you your opinion on them, but I definitely feel you could have controlled yourself and not gone to such an ugly place. The truth is, you don't like these people. We get it. But, you're supposed to be the mature, rational one, and you're just making things worse with comments like that. On the other hand, you say it like you mean it. Doesn't mean it's right, though. I just think about how you defend your own marriage and your family and fight so hard when people say negative things about you. Why attack someone else who's already got a target on her back? You did the impossible. You made me feel a smidge of sympathy for Teresa. You have to get over this hatred for her because it's making you look completely nuts.
Jacqueline: I am really tired of all the tabloid talk. I want you to never read one of those magazines again. Seriously. At the time this was taped, I do think you missed Teresa and wanted to be her friend again, but unfortunately, you and Teresa do not live on the same planet emotionally. You have to LET IT GO. I'm sick of seeing you cry for a friend that is clearly fine without you. It happens! Get over it! I hate to be so harsh, but damn! This storyline is so irritating now! I almost want you to blow up and get it over with, because this whole mad/sad/mad/sad business is maddening.
Kathy: I don't think you meant any harm with the cookie comments, let's face facts, they're FAMILY recipes. And you are related. You should know by now who you're dealing with. So, next time, just say "nice book" and get the hell out of dodge. It sucks that when you say ANYTHING even remotely not-kiss-assey to Teresa, she takes it as an insult. As her cousin, you know Teresa, and you know that she is a spoiled brat. Treat her like the child that she is, and be done with it. Please. No more nicey nice, no more awkward small talk, just be as civil as possible. She doesn't appreciate effort. She doesn't appreciate nice. So, treat her like an acquaintance. Some people like to be treated like sh*t - I know these people. The minute you ignore them, that's when they want to kiss your ass.
Melissa: The photo shoot was ok, but I would actually love to see you spend more time on your vocal training. I'm serious. If you worked half as hard on your voice as you do your looks, there would be no questions from anyone about your vocal abilities. Just saying. I have no problem with you wanting to pursue singing. I just think you need to take the SINGING part more seriously. We need to see you work with a vocal coach, we need to see you doing warm ups, we need to see you practice your breathing. If this is your career, you need to treat it as such, and not just a fun game you're playing. Do you know how many people are dying to have a chance to perform on tv? At Beatstock? Have their song on iTunes? Do better, Melissa.
Teresa: I'm getting on everyone this week, so do not be surprised that I'm coming for you right now. First of all, you need to know that not everything is about you all the time. So what Kathy said the cookies in your book were her mom's? You wrote the book! You know whose recipes they are! And is it really so hard to understand that your mom and her mom have the same recipe? Listen to Kathy's tone, it wasn't accusatory at all. Now, let's move on to your comments about Skinnygirl. So you don't like the way it tastes? Fine. Did you have to name it by name in your confessional? NO. Totally unnecessary. The Fabellini business, OMG, I was embarrassed for you. Why did you even bring Joe Giudice along? Nothing but negativity pours out of his mouth, and it's like you can't get enough. I'm tired of you being so defensive about everything. I'm tired of you projecting all of your bullsh*t onto everyone else. I'm tired of this storyline and I'm tired of you. Woman up! You spent the entire episode being mad. Is this how you want to live? And by the way, showing your toddler how to put money in her "bubbies" isn't helping you on this show either.
I am really tired of all the immature, high school idiocy that is happening on this show. If it continues, I cannot watch anymore. Next season better have a revamped cast, and honestly, I don't care who goes or stays at this point. Just fix it, because the show is dark, mean, and almost unwatchable. And I'm through.
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Monday, July 16, 2012
New Attitude
First, I have to make a correction to my last Real Housewives of New Jersey blog. I referenced a scene that I had watched on Bravotv.com that didn't air in last week's episode - the scene in Teresa's kitchen where she's getting her hair/makeup done for Beatstock and Gia makes a crack about Melissa - that was a preview that I had seen online, and accidentally lumped it together with last week's episode in my mind. So, my apologies for that. However, it did air this week, so now, it's fair game. Feel free to tweet me and scold me. I promise I will refrain from watching previews online until AFTER I've written my blog from now on.
On to this week's episode. I have to say it was entertaining. Except for Chris Manzo puking his guts out - ain't nobody got time for that! (Sweet Brown voice.) Seriously, if I hear, see, or smell vomit, I get sick myself, so I was not a happy camper during that little escapade. Now, about Albie. Why am I not surprised he'd pick his family over his girl? Boy, please, have several seats. I'm just saying, you're not ready for any kind of relationship when you're living for someone else's approval. Point blank period. And I have to shout out Greg again this week. I loved that he was so starstruck with Ms. Patti LaBelle. I mean, who wouldn't be?! She's the Godmother! And I loved how nice she was. I just wish she could have met everyone on the cast and gotten them together. Because Ms. Patti READS, honey. She needs to read that whole cast to filth. And if you don't know what reading is, look it up, and while you're at it, look up shade, too. You'll thank me later.
So let's jump right in.
Jacqueline: You were hardly in the episode! I'll skip you this week and wait till I see you in Napa next week.
Caroline: The menopause is messing with your moods again! But at least you weren't on a warpath this week. What you said (about wanting to disinvite the Giudice's but not being able to) wasn't even that bad. It's just a matter of fact. We've all had to deal with people we're not particularly fond of. I'm just gonna ask you again, don't start nothing in Napa, won't be nothing in Napa (and yes, I know the show's already filmed but I like to give my advice as if it's happening now). On another note, I like how you were supporting both blk and the Brownstone sauce at the expo (or whatever it was called). Caroline's grade for the week: B (for working it at the expo/food fest).
Teresa: I was happy to see you have a semi-nice conversation with Melissa after the Beatstock performance. Although, it did look a little staged/rehearsed, I'm going to give both of you the benefit of the doubt and say that you were both TRYING. Which is great! And Gia's performance at Beatstock was awesome. She is very talented! Now, I have to address Gia's comments about Melissa. Like I said last week, she got that whole lipsynching thing from someone. And if it wasn't you, I'm guessing it was Joe Giudice. My thing is, a child shouldn't be allowed to make fun of an adult - especially a relative. Gia mocking Melissa was in poor taste and inappropriate. Instead of telling her so, you did nothing and Joe laughed. When Milania said, "Melissa stinks", same thing. If you really want the family to get along, you HAVE to let your kids know that it's not ok to belittle, make fun of, or talk bad about their aunt. They have to be told that doing so is disrespectful and mean. Here's a sincere question: do your kids know they're on tv? Because if they do, and they did that in front of the cameras, they must know it could be on the show and eventually Melissa would see it. That's where you come in, as a mother, and tell them, "Ok, you said that about Aunt Melissa and she's going to see it. It may hurt her feelings. So, you need to apologize to her for saying that because it was disrespectful." I'm just saying, my mom is old school and we were NEVER allowed to make fun of our aunts and uncles like that. Maybe you had a talk with the girls or chastised them for that and we just didn't see it. I'm just saying, it was wrong, and it made you look like you really didn't care what they said about her. And that's in direct conflict with the progress that you're trying to make. And it makes you look two-faced. There. I said it. I hope I'm wrong, though. I definitely like you better when you're having a good time and being nice to people. Teresa's grade for the week: C (because I can't prove that she didn't tell the kids to stop making fun of Melissa, but it definitely was not appropriate for them to talk like that).
Melissa: Now, don't think that just because I was hard on Tre, I'm gonna be a softie with you. Like I told Teresa, your conversation looked fake and forced, but I have no idea if it was just the awkwardness between you or what. So, like I said, I'm giving you both credit for talking and being civil with each other. I think there was way too much sex talk with you and Joe Gorga and frankly, it was gross. I don't need to hear any more about poison, thanks. So, please, no more sexy time scenes. I'm begging you. Your Beatstock performance was good, and it was nice to see your family there to cheer you on. And I loved that you hugged Gia at the end. That must have been an awesome experience to share with her. (Despite her comments about you.) Melissa's grade for the week: C (for being civil with Teresa, but I'm over the Gorga love scenes, ick).
Kathy: I'm proud of you for pursuing your culinary dreams - and seriously, those cannolis looked amazing. Richie's big mouth may get you into trouble, though. Maybe he feels like since it's a neighborhood company (the ice cream company), it's less formal, but really, it's still a business meeting. Hopefully, you told him to keep his comments to himself for the next time. I think you still have good intentions on getting along with Teresa, and you haven't done or said anything to jeopardize it. So, I'm still Team Kathy. Just reel Richie in a little bit, ok? Kathy's grade for the week: B (for focusing on her business, but Richie needs to watch his mouth).
What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!
On to this week's episode. I have to say it was entertaining. Except for Chris Manzo puking his guts out - ain't nobody got time for that! (Sweet Brown voice.) Seriously, if I hear, see, or smell vomit, I get sick myself, so I was not a happy camper during that little escapade. Now, about Albie. Why am I not surprised he'd pick his family over his girl? Boy, please, have several seats. I'm just saying, you're not ready for any kind of relationship when you're living for someone else's approval. Point blank period. And I have to shout out Greg again this week. I loved that he was so starstruck with Ms. Patti LaBelle. I mean, who wouldn't be?! She's the Godmother! And I loved how nice she was. I just wish she could have met everyone on the cast and gotten them together. Because Ms. Patti READS, honey. She needs to read that whole cast to filth. And if you don't know what reading is, look it up, and while you're at it, look up shade, too. You'll thank me later.
So let's jump right in.
Jacqueline: You were hardly in the episode! I'll skip you this week and wait till I see you in Napa next week.
Caroline: The menopause is messing with your moods again! But at least you weren't on a warpath this week. What you said (about wanting to disinvite the Giudice's but not being able to) wasn't even that bad. It's just a matter of fact. We've all had to deal with people we're not particularly fond of. I'm just gonna ask you again, don't start nothing in Napa, won't be nothing in Napa (and yes, I know the show's already filmed but I like to give my advice as if it's happening now). On another note, I like how you were supporting both blk and the Brownstone sauce at the expo (or whatever it was called). Caroline's grade for the week: B (for working it at the expo/food fest).
Teresa: I was happy to see you have a semi-nice conversation with Melissa after the Beatstock performance. Although, it did look a little staged/rehearsed, I'm going to give both of you the benefit of the doubt and say that you were both TRYING. Which is great! And Gia's performance at Beatstock was awesome. She is very talented! Now, I have to address Gia's comments about Melissa. Like I said last week, she got that whole lipsynching thing from someone. And if it wasn't you, I'm guessing it was Joe Giudice. My thing is, a child shouldn't be allowed to make fun of an adult - especially a relative. Gia mocking Melissa was in poor taste and inappropriate. Instead of telling her so, you did nothing and Joe laughed. When Milania said, "Melissa stinks", same thing. If you really want the family to get along, you HAVE to let your kids know that it's not ok to belittle, make fun of, or talk bad about their aunt. They have to be told that doing so is disrespectful and mean. Here's a sincere question: do your kids know they're on tv? Because if they do, and they did that in front of the cameras, they must know it could be on the show and eventually Melissa would see it. That's where you come in, as a mother, and tell them, "Ok, you said that about Aunt Melissa and she's going to see it. It may hurt her feelings. So, you need to apologize to her for saying that because it was disrespectful." I'm just saying, my mom is old school and we were NEVER allowed to make fun of our aunts and uncles like that. Maybe you had a talk with the girls or chastised them for that and we just didn't see it. I'm just saying, it was wrong, and it made you look like you really didn't care what they said about her. And that's in direct conflict with the progress that you're trying to make. And it makes you look two-faced. There. I said it. I hope I'm wrong, though. I definitely like you better when you're having a good time and being nice to people. Teresa's grade for the week: C (because I can't prove that she didn't tell the kids to stop making fun of Melissa, but it definitely was not appropriate for them to talk like that).
Melissa: Now, don't think that just because I was hard on Tre, I'm gonna be a softie with you. Like I told Teresa, your conversation looked fake and forced, but I have no idea if it was just the awkwardness between you or what. So, like I said, I'm giving you both credit for talking and being civil with each other. I think there was way too much sex talk with you and Joe Gorga and frankly, it was gross. I don't need to hear any more about poison, thanks. So, please, no more sexy time scenes. I'm begging you. Your Beatstock performance was good, and it was nice to see your family there to cheer you on. And I loved that you hugged Gia at the end. That must have been an awesome experience to share with her. (Despite her comments about you.) Melissa's grade for the week: C (for being civil with Teresa, but I'm over the Gorga love scenes, ick).
Kathy: I'm proud of you for pursuing your culinary dreams - and seriously, those cannolis looked amazing. Richie's big mouth may get you into trouble, though. Maybe he feels like since it's a neighborhood company (the ice cream company), it's less formal, but really, it's still a business meeting. Hopefully, you told him to keep his comments to himself for the next time. I think you still have good intentions on getting along with Teresa, and you haven't done or said anything to jeopardize it. So, I'm still Team Kathy. Just reel Richie in a little bit, ok? Kathy's grade for the week: B (for focusing on her business, but Richie needs to watch his mouth).
What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!
Monday, June 11, 2012
Ridiculosity
This week's Real Housewives of New Jersey was basically a diagram of opposites. Beautiful wedding vs. selling stories to magazines for money. Love and happiness vs. looking like you want to tear someone's throat out. I'm not going to lie. Travelling with people you don't like sucks. Hard. I know first hand. But, sometimes you do have to just grit your teeth and get through the whole thing, especially if a celebration is taking place. The wedding was gorgeous and very emotional - and I liked that everyone was truly happy for Jaime and Rich. I love that we had that moment of all-around positivity, however brief. Oh, and Joe Gorga's impression of Joe Giudice made me laugh out loud!
But the show isn't all love and light (shout out to Danielle Staub - remember her?), so let's get into the cattiness, bitchiness, and sheer ridiculosity of this episode.
Teresa: I'm going make this short. I think it's wrong that you let a magazine write whatever they want around an interview with you and in essence, let the magazine misrepresent you in exchange for money. I think it's wrong that you won't even consider the idea of therapy. I think it's not such a great idea to listen to Joe Giudice about not going to therapy - because he probably knows that if you do go to therapy, you'll become a much more self-aware person and maybe not put up with as much bullsh*t from him. Just saying. I also think it was in poor taste to announce your book being on the best seller's list and then thank a bunch of people that you said some not so great things about in the book for their "support". I'll reserve the rest of my thoughts until I see your complete meltdown next week. And it's not going to be nice. So, get ready. Teresa's grade for the week: N/A (no grade needed because I want to wait until next week so I can really let loose).
Caroline: When people criticize you for being holier-than-thou and superior, I see where they're coming from. Let's be real. You looked like you wanted to jump out of that bus anytime Teresa and Joe Giudice spoke. Not that I blame you. But, I think you could definitely not let people get under your skin as much. If I were you, I would have paid for a separate car to take to the wedding. And who cares what anyone would have thought of it? You're the groom's sister and you want to take your own car, so what?! And by the way, where was Al? I though it was odd that your husband wasn't at the wedding. Did I miss something? Anyway, I think you gave way too much thought and energy to the tabloid article that came out about Teresa that day. At this point, you shouldn't even read them or be surprised by them. You know what it is. Your speech was very nice, but I would have picked something completely different for you to wear. Not that it matters. I'm just saying. The previews for next week are crazy, and I'm not sure how I feel about you crashing Jacqueline and Teresa's conversation. We'll see how that plays out. Caroline's grade for the week: D+ (because I liked her speech but she was WAY too grumpy for my taste).
Melissa: I didn't think you said anything out of line this week. You've been surprisingly calm throughout this whole Teresa-tabloid-mess. I say you're smart to play it cool. Others see it differently, but we can all agree to disagree. I don't know anything about you all except what I see on the show and what I occasionally read online, and I base my opinions on that. On the show, you're alright with me. I don't know if I like the new song, but I'm willing to listen to the finished product and give it a whirl. Melissa's grade this week: B (for not blowing up about the article and playing it cool).
Jacqueline: The fence is getting narrower and narrower and next week, we'll finally see you jump off of it. I've been waiting all season for this. Not that I'm happy about your friendship with Teresa ending, but it really is the turning point and it'll answer a lot of our questions. In this episode, you're still teetering on top of the fence. I think you're right to question Teresa's character. She's told you she gets money for being on the magazines, and she's told you she doesn't want to go to therapy - two things that are directly related to the problem not getting resolved. Then she tells you she doesn't hold grudges (which we all know she does). All of it is like white noise now. And I don't blame you for being frustrated. I thought you tried to help her see that therapy is a viable solution to her problem, which she promptly dismissed. If I were you, that would have been my breaking point. I would have had Buddha as my witness that I was done talking about this and that I couldn't take this bullsh*t anymore. I think we all need to watch what happens next week to see the actual fault lines open up between you and Teresa once and for all. Other than that, I thought you were on that fence long enough, and it's about time you picked a side. It really didn't matter to me which one you chose. I was just tired of seeing you trying to please everyone, meanwhile, you're completely exhausted. Jacqueline's grade for the week: C- (because she was still trying to get through to Teresa while having all of these doubts, and it's time to just put her cards on the table).
Kathy: You were having a blast at that pool party! I love seeing all of you have a good time. And Rosie was hilarious, as always. I can see how hurt you are about the articles, and how much you wish things were different. But we can all see that you are capable of honest communication. I love that Richie was helping Joe Gorga reach out to Teresa again. That was great. I really don't think anyone can knock you or Richie this season. You've done a lot to try to help the situation, but those tabloids are just making things worse. And you're right, those articles are trash. Now, I totally understand why you don't actively seek Teresa out because every time you do, it's a problem. And you don't need that kind of aggravation. Kathy's grade for the week: A (because what she said about the articles is absolutely 100% right on).
What did you think of the episode? Tweet me!
But the show isn't all love and light (shout out to Danielle Staub - remember her?), so let's get into the cattiness, bitchiness, and sheer ridiculosity of this episode.
Teresa: I'm going make this short. I think it's wrong that you let a magazine write whatever they want around an interview with you and in essence, let the magazine misrepresent you in exchange for money. I think it's wrong that you won't even consider the idea of therapy. I think it's not such a great idea to listen to Joe Giudice about not going to therapy - because he probably knows that if you do go to therapy, you'll become a much more self-aware person and maybe not put up with as much bullsh*t from him. Just saying. I also think it was in poor taste to announce your book being on the best seller's list and then thank a bunch of people that you said some not so great things about in the book for their "support". I'll reserve the rest of my thoughts until I see your complete meltdown next week. And it's not going to be nice. So, get ready. Teresa's grade for the week: N/A (no grade needed because I want to wait until next week so I can really let loose).
Caroline: When people criticize you for being holier-than-thou and superior, I see where they're coming from. Let's be real. You looked like you wanted to jump out of that bus anytime Teresa and Joe Giudice spoke. Not that I blame you. But, I think you could definitely not let people get under your skin as much. If I were you, I would have paid for a separate car to take to the wedding. And who cares what anyone would have thought of it? You're the groom's sister and you want to take your own car, so what?! And by the way, where was Al? I though it was odd that your husband wasn't at the wedding. Did I miss something? Anyway, I think you gave way too much thought and energy to the tabloid article that came out about Teresa that day. At this point, you shouldn't even read them or be surprised by them. You know what it is. Your speech was very nice, but I would have picked something completely different for you to wear. Not that it matters. I'm just saying. The previews for next week are crazy, and I'm not sure how I feel about you crashing Jacqueline and Teresa's conversation. We'll see how that plays out. Caroline's grade for the week: D+ (because I liked her speech but she was WAY too grumpy for my taste).
Melissa: I didn't think you said anything out of line this week. You've been surprisingly calm throughout this whole Teresa-tabloid-mess. I say you're smart to play it cool. Others see it differently, but we can all agree to disagree. I don't know anything about you all except what I see on the show and what I occasionally read online, and I base my opinions on that. On the show, you're alright with me. I don't know if I like the new song, but I'm willing to listen to the finished product and give it a whirl. Melissa's grade this week: B (for not blowing up about the article and playing it cool).
Jacqueline: The fence is getting narrower and narrower and next week, we'll finally see you jump off of it. I've been waiting all season for this. Not that I'm happy about your friendship with Teresa ending, but it really is the turning point and it'll answer a lot of our questions. In this episode, you're still teetering on top of the fence. I think you're right to question Teresa's character. She's told you she gets money for being on the magazines, and she's told you she doesn't want to go to therapy - two things that are directly related to the problem not getting resolved. Then she tells you she doesn't hold grudges (which we all know she does). All of it is like white noise now. And I don't blame you for being frustrated. I thought you tried to help her see that therapy is a viable solution to her problem, which she promptly dismissed. If I were you, that would have been my breaking point. I would have had Buddha as my witness that I was done talking about this and that I couldn't take this bullsh*t anymore. I think we all need to watch what happens next week to see the actual fault lines open up between you and Teresa once and for all. Other than that, I thought you were on that fence long enough, and it's about time you picked a side. It really didn't matter to me which one you chose. I was just tired of seeing you trying to please everyone, meanwhile, you're completely exhausted. Jacqueline's grade for the week: C- (because she was still trying to get through to Teresa while having all of these doubts, and it's time to just put her cards on the table).
Kathy: You were having a blast at that pool party! I love seeing all of you have a good time. And Rosie was hilarious, as always. I can see how hurt you are about the articles, and how much you wish things were different. But we can all see that you are capable of honest communication. I love that Richie was helping Joe Gorga reach out to Teresa again. That was great. I really don't think anyone can knock you or Richie this season. You've done a lot to try to help the situation, but those tabloids are just making things worse. And you're right, those articles are trash. Now, I totally understand why you don't actively seek Teresa out because every time you do, it's a problem. And you don't need that kind of aggravation. Kathy's grade for the week: A (because what she said about the articles is absolutely 100% right on).
What did you think of the episode? Tweet me!
Friday, May 18, 2012
Therapy is Your Friend!
My apologies for this blog being so late, but things have been a little crazy, so forgive me. The latest episode of Real Housewives of New Jersey was so sad. It's so frustrating when it's so clear what the problem is to the audience (most of us), but the person/people on the show just don't get it. Is that what comes from becoming a reality tv star? Do you become so detached from real life that you honestly believe you can do no wrong? In that case, I'll make sure never to be on a reality show. I want to remain self aware, thank you very much. But let's get right into the episode, kids.
Kathy: I'm sorry the pool party turned out to be a dud. Except for Rosie and the kids having fun together, it was sort of a disaster. I understand being upset that certain people didn't show up, that's always disappointing, even if they have valid reasons for not coming. It takes a lot of effort to plan, organize, and execute a party - even a backyard BBQ, and your efforts didn't go unnoticed. I love that you love to entertain. Hopefully, your parties in the future will not be as depressing as this one was. And it wasn't even anything you did! Richie was right to have the kids not invite their school friends. He knew what was coming. Unfortunately, you can't have Teresa over without her making a scene. And Joe Gorga made one, too. So it was even worse. Do the kids a favor, next year, just have a school-friends party. I admire you wanting everyone to get along, and be the "glue", but you have to step back at some point and see the situation for what it is. As long as Teresa has rocks for brains, which is apparent and evident, there is nothing you can do. Focus on the rest of your family, and enjoy yourself. Maybe Teresa will see that and decide that it's finally time to change her ways. Kathy's grade for the week: A (for effort and for staying positive).
Melissa: I am so glad you didn't get into it with Teresa at the pool party. You were playing with all of the kids and socializing, which is what you're supposed to do at a family function. Good for you. And props to you for not getting involved in your husband and Teresa's conversation. That right there shows that you respect their relationship enough to stay out of it and let them have their time together. I honestly do not believe that you are this gold-digging horsey-faced tramp, which you were so eloquently called by Joe Giudice. I was skeptical of you at first when you came on the show last season, but I can clearly see that you're not what Joe Giudice says you are. And if for any reason you haven't been 100% honest with the audience, and you are those things, then you deserve an Oscar, an Emmy, and a Tony for pulling the wool over my eyes. Which is not easy. I have to address all the rumors about you and your past. First of all, we all have made mistakes, and if you learned from them, that's all that matters. I'm not even that interested in your past. But, it would take the wind out of certain people's sails if you would admit to whatever it is that they keep bringing up about you - if it's true. We all know what's coming - the infamous Posche fashion show - and the allegations and supposed people from your past coming forward. Like I said, I like you and I think you're being very rational this season, so hopefully all this foolishness will subside and the truth prevails. Just make sure you're on the right side of the truth, that's all. Melissa's grade for the week: A (for acting like a grown up, but Joe Gorga gets an F, I'll explain later).
Caroline: I thought the anniversary gift and festivities were sweet, and it was nice to see you and Al reminisce about your years together. That's a wonderful blessing, and I can see that both of you appreciate each other immensely. However, I need you to stop talking negatively about your body. Talking about your turkey neck and cellulite is not necessary, and I have a feeling that's where Lauren gets her screwed up ideas about body image. Just stop criticizing yourself and maybe Lauren will, too. I don't blame you for not going to the pool party, because it was going to be a Teresa-fest, and I hope you let Kathy know exactly why you didn't show up. It isn't Kathy's fault that Teresa ruins every function she attends. I can see that you have nothing but animosity towards Teresa - and you may be completely right about her. I actually agree with you that she is insane, but saying that Melissa is a younger, better version of Teresa may be a tad bit over the line. I say, take all that animosity and turn it into something productive. I mean, you can only hold on to so much anger towards Teresa for so long. Let it go and channel that energy into a new project. Maybe a book of your own or a podcast or another radio show? And for the record, I'm so jealous of the Jaguar. But I'll get mine someday, too. I want a black one, though. Caroline's grade for the week: C (because she can do better at this point).
Jacqueline: The scene with Ashlee was a little hard to watch, because Ashlee was in a bad mood and the attitude crept back in. But the conversation ended on a positive note with some "I love you"s, so that was good. I was a little bit bummed that you didn't go to Kathy's pool party, but after watching the Teresa-and-Joe-bomb go off, it was for the best. You would have been in the middle and that's not a good look for you anymore. I liked the scene where you tried to relate your experience with Dina to Teresa's, and her reaction was priceless. Deflect, deflect, deflect. I swear NASA needs to look into what Teresa's skull is made of because that thing is impenetrable. In your blog this week, you clarify that your trainer was dealing with alcoholism at the time of shooting the episode, and she even contributed to your blog and told her story. I'm glad she had an outlet to explain her journey, because it was jarring to see this trainer go off and sneak sips out of a flask during a workout. But, hey, she got help and she's better for it now. Maybe others can learn from her story. I also want to thank you for being up front and honest in your blog and on Twitter. I know it's not always easy, but your candidness is appreciated. And all this happened a year ago! Reliving it probably doesn't always feel great. So thanks for keeping it real. Jacqueline's grade for the week: B (for working on her issues with Ashlee and trying to get through to Teresa).
Teresa: I left you for last for a reason. I'm not going to treat you with kid gloves anymore. I was disgusted with you and your husband this week. You do not listen to anyone, ever. I take that back. You listen to Joe Giudice, which is much, much worse. When a grown man calls another man's wife a tramp and says he knows who she's been with, whether it's true or not - it's out of line. I know Richie jokes about you and says you're a pea brain, but he has never talked about you in a sexual connotation. Joe Giudice spoke about Melissa in a sexual context and that is not right. You cannot spin that one. And like I said, even if it is true, number one - it's none of his business, and number two - if it was true, it was in the past, and she's a wife and mother now. I'm sure Joe Giudice made mistakes in his past, and I'm pretty sure he wouldn't appreciate someone bringing them up over and over. His current mistakes are out in public, and he's all butt hurt that people talk about them now. And then, for you to LAUGH as he calls Melissa all those horrible names, calls Kathy a frog face, and calls Rosie a BUTCHIE BOY??? Really?? Did Joe Giudice learn NOTHING from his F-word debacle? Joe Giudice is the worst kind of assh*le - he's proud of it. And apparently, so are you. Because you laughed at it, and you participated in it. Joe Giudice's motive becomes clear when he yells: "YOU DON'T NEED ANYBODY". So that's it. You don't need friends or family, because you have him. I wish I could pry your eyes open to see how f*cked up that man is. And you defend him in your blog, saying that he's old school. I'm sorry. That's not old school. That's psychotic. But enough about Joe Giudice. Let's address some of the things YOU said this week. Such as, Gia didn't like Melissa at first and kids have great intuition. Well, let's see. Kids take their cues from their parents, and you obviously didn't like Melissa (EVER), so that mystery has been solved. Then, you tell your brother that you're never going to tell him anything ever again, because he told Melissa about your comment regarding Melissa leaving your brother for a richer man. From now on, I'm calling it the "richer man" comment. To save time. Be real, Teresa. You tell your husband everything. It was proven during your lovely conversation mentioned earlier. So, don't be surprised that your brother tells his wife whatever he wants. And even if you have a problem with it, it's none of your business. He is married. He is a father. That is his primary concern. You are always going to be siblings, but he has to put his wife and kids first, just like you do. What the eff is so hard to understand about that?? Now, your brother was wrong for a few things - first, he should have left Joe Giuidice out of the conversation all together. Second, he should not have said he was "an angel", because let's face it, none of us are. Third, he should not have said that "God will punish you", because that was way out of line. You two definitely are related, because you both fight dirty. I will also let you know that calling Melissa the C-word probably hurt your case more than anything else. Your true feelings are out there, now, honey, so now, you have to DEAL WITH IT. No fake magazine apologies, no more vague blame-shifting blogs. OWN IT. Be the b*tch and stand by what you say. If you would just own your sh*t, people would at least give you credit for being honest. But you try to act like you have no idea why people are upset with you and it's all their fault. PLEASE. PLEASE be REAL. I know this all happened a year ago, but I swear, if you show up to the reunion with the same batsh*t attitude you had at the last reunion, you lose. You become the villain( you kind of already are), but you have time to turn it around. And if you don't believe me, just ask Danielle Staub and Jill Zarin how being the psycho villain worked out for them. Teresa's grade for the week: F (obviously).
Final thoughts: At this point, that therapy session needs to happen with Teresa and her brother STAT! No more one on one conversations, because neither of them are any good at those. THERAPY is MADE for people like this. Therapy will do wonders for them. Joe Gorga - you were so wrong for calling your sister a f*cking b*tch. That was not okay. Just as wrong as what she called your wife. No matter how upset you were, there was no excuse for that. Rosie, you are amazing and wonderful and if you want to have short hair and wear cute caps, DO YOU, like I know you will. You're beautiful just the way you are. Lastly, any Teresa fans that can explain how she's right for any of this craziness, please tweet me. If you can rationally and logically explain it, I will quote you in next week's blog.
There you have it, kids, you know what to do. Tweet me!
Kathy: I'm sorry the pool party turned out to be a dud. Except for Rosie and the kids having fun together, it was sort of a disaster. I understand being upset that certain people didn't show up, that's always disappointing, even if they have valid reasons for not coming. It takes a lot of effort to plan, organize, and execute a party - even a backyard BBQ, and your efforts didn't go unnoticed. I love that you love to entertain. Hopefully, your parties in the future will not be as depressing as this one was. And it wasn't even anything you did! Richie was right to have the kids not invite their school friends. He knew what was coming. Unfortunately, you can't have Teresa over without her making a scene. And Joe Gorga made one, too. So it was even worse. Do the kids a favor, next year, just have a school-friends party. I admire you wanting everyone to get along, and be the "glue", but you have to step back at some point and see the situation for what it is. As long as Teresa has rocks for brains, which is apparent and evident, there is nothing you can do. Focus on the rest of your family, and enjoy yourself. Maybe Teresa will see that and decide that it's finally time to change her ways. Kathy's grade for the week: A (for effort and for staying positive).
Melissa: I am so glad you didn't get into it with Teresa at the pool party. You were playing with all of the kids and socializing, which is what you're supposed to do at a family function. Good for you. And props to you for not getting involved in your husband and Teresa's conversation. That right there shows that you respect their relationship enough to stay out of it and let them have their time together. I honestly do not believe that you are this gold-digging horsey-faced tramp, which you were so eloquently called by Joe Giudice. I was skeptical of you at first when you came on the show last season, but I can clearly see that you're not what Joe Giudice says you are. And if for any reason you haven't been 100% honest with the audience, and you are those things, then you deserve an Oscar, an Emmy, and a Tony for pulling the wool over my eyes. Which is not easy. I have to address all the rumors about you and your past. First of all, we all have made mistakes, and if you learned from them, that's all that matters. I'm not even that interested in your past. But, it would take the wind out of certain people's sails if you would admit to whatever it is that they keep bringing up about you - if it's true. We all know what's coming - the infamous Posche fashion show - and the allegations and supposed people from your past coming forward. Like I said, I like you and I think you're being very rational this season, so hopefully all this foolishness will subside and the truth prevails. Just make sure you're on the right side of the truth, that's all. Melissa's grade for the week: A (for acting like a grown up, but Joe Gorga gets an F, I'll explain later).
Caroline: I thought the anniversary gift and festivities were sweet, and it was nice to see you and Al reminisce about your years together. That's a wonderful blessing, and I can see that both of you appreciate each other immensely. However, I need you to stop talking negatively about your body. Talking about your turkey neck and cellulite is not necessary, and I have a feeling that's where Lauren gets her screwed up ideas about body image. Just stop criticizing yourself and maybe Lauren will, too. I don't blame you for not going to the pool party, because it was going to be a Teresa-fest, and I hope you let Kathy know exactly why you didn't show up. It isn't Kathy's fault that Teresa ruins every function she attends. I can see that you have nothing but animosity towards Teresa - and you may be completely right about her. I actually agree with you that she is insane, but saying that Melissa is a younger, better version of Teresa may be a tad bit over the line. I say, take all that animosity and turn it into something productive. I mean, you can only hold on to so much anger towards Teresa for so long. Let it go and channel that energy into a new project. Maybe a book of your own or a podcast or another radio show? And for the record, I'm so jealous of the Jaguar. But I'll get mine someday, too. I want a black one, though. Caroline's grade for the week: C (because she can do better at this point).
Jacqueline: The scene with Ashlee was a little hard to watch, because Ashlee was in a bad mood and the attitude crept back in. But the conversation ended on a positive note with some "I love you"s, so that was good. I was a little bit bummed that you didn't go to Kathy's pool party, but after watching the Teresa-and-Joe-bomb go off, it was for the best. You would have been in the middle and that's not a good look for you anymore. I liked the scene where you tried to relate your experience with Dina to Teresa's, and her reaction was priceless. Deflect, deflect, deflect. I swear NASA needs to look into what Teresa's skull is made of because that thing is impenetrable. In your blog this week, you clarify that your trainer was dealing with alcoholism at the time of shooting the episode, and she even contributed to your blog and told her story. I'm glad she had an outlet to explain her journey, because it was jarring to see this trainer go off and sneak sips out of a flask during a workout. But, hey, she got help and she's better for it now. Maybe others can learn from her story. I also want to thank you for being up front and honest in your blog and on Twitter. I know it's not always easy, but your candidness is appreciated. And all this happened a year ago! Reliving it probably doesn't always feel great. So thanks for keeping it real. Jacqueline's grade for the week: B (for working on her issues with Ashlee and trying to get through to Teresa).
Teresa: I left you for last for a reason. I'm not going to treat you with kid gloves anymore. I was disgusted with you and your husband this week. You do not listen to anyone, ever. I take that back. You listen to Joe Giudice, which is much, much worse. When a grown man calls another man's wife a tramp and says he knows who she's been with, whether it's true or not - it's out of line. I know Richie jokes about you and says you're a pea brain, but he has never talked about you in a sexual connotation. Joe Giudice spoke about Melissa in a sexual context and that is not right. You cannot spin that one. And like I said, even if it is true, number one - it's none of his business, and number two - if it was true, it was in the past, and she's a wife and mother now. I'm sure Joe Giudice made mistakes in his past, and I'm pretty sure he wouldn't appreciate someone bringing them up over and over. His current mistakes are out in public, and he's all butt hurt that people talk about them now. And then, for you to LAUGH as he calls Melissa all those horrible names, calls Kathy a frog face, and calls Rosie a BUTCHIE BOY??? Really?? Did Joe Giudice learn NOTHING from his F-word debacle? Joe Giudice is the worst kind of assh*le - he's proud of it. And apparently, so are you. Because you laughed at it, and you participated in it. Joe Giudice's motive becomes clear when he yells: "YOU DON'T NEED ANYBODY". So that's it. You don't need friends or family, because you have him. I wish I could pry your eyes open to see how f*cked up that man is. And you defend him in your blog, saying that he's old school. I'm sorry. That's not old school. That's psychotic. But enough about Joe Giudice. Let's address some of the things YOU said this week. Such as, Gia didn't like Melissa at first and kids have great intuition. Well, let's see. Kids take their cues from their parents, and you obviously didn't like Melissa (EVER), so that mystery has been solved. Then, you tell your brother that you're never going to tell him anything ever again, because he told Melissa about your comment regarding Melissa leaving your brother for a richer man. From now on, I'm calling it the "richer man" comment. To save time. Be real, Teresa. You tell your husband everything. It was proven during your lovely conversation mentioned earlier. So, don't be surprised that your brother tells his wife whatever he wants. And even if you have a problem with it, it's none of your business. He is married. He is a father. That is his primary concern. You are always going to be siblings, but he has to put his wife and kids first, just like you do. What the eff is so hard to understand about that?? Now, your brother was wrong for a few things - first, he should have left Joe Giuidice out of the conversation all together. Second, he should not have said he was "an angel", because let's face it, none of us are. Third, he should not have said that "God will punish you", because that was way out of line. You two definitely are related, because you both fight dirty. I will also let you know that calling Melissa the C-word probably hurt your case more than anything else. Your true feelings are out there, now, honey, so now, you have to DEAL WITH IT. No fake magazine apologies, no more vague blame-shifting blogs. OWN IT. Be the b*tch and stand by what you say. If you would just own your sh*t, people would at least give you credit for being honest. But you try to act like you have no idea why people are upset with you and it's all their fault. PLEASE. PLEASE be REAL. I know this all happened a year ago, but I swear, if you show up to the reunion with the same batsh*t attitude you had at the last reunion, you lose. You become the villain( you kind of already are), but you have time to turn it around. And if you don't believe me, just ask Danielle Staub and Jill Zarin how being the psycho villain worked out for them. Teresa's grade for the week: F (obviously).
Final thoughts: At this point, that therapy session needs to happen with Teresa and her brother STAT! No more one on one conversations, because neither of them are any good at those. THERAPY is MADE for people like this. Therapy will do wonders for them. Joe Gorga - you were so wrong for calling your sister a f*cking b*tch. That was not okay. Just as wrong as what she called your wife. No matter how upset you were, there was no excuse for that. Rosie, you are amazing and wonderful and if you want to have short hair and wear cute caps, DO YOU, like I know you will. You're beautiful just the way you are. Lastly, any Teresa fans that can explain how she's right for any of this craziness, please tweet me. If you can rationally and logically explain it, I will quote you in next week's blog.
There you have it, kids, you know what to do. Tweet me!
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