Friday, March 30, 2012

Have Several!

It's time to run down the week in Watch What Happens Live-ness, and it was quite a spectacular week! I really enjoyed all of the shows. I think that vacation did everyone some good. Check out all of the After Shows here.

Sunday, March 25: Coco (T) and Cynthia from RHOA. I loved this show. It was so silly and fun and the girls really got along well together. Coco's ass was the main attraction, but hey, that thing is a celebrity in it's own right. The game (Coco T or Coco A) was so funny. Definitely a good time. Andy seemed happy to be back, also.

Monday, March 26: Casey Wilson and Tamar Braxton. Maybe one of the oddest pairs on the show so far. It took Casey a good moment to get used to Tamar, but once she did, it was a lot of fun. And I loved the bartender - a gorgeous drag queen by the name of Tanika Braxton. This show was super entertaining once everyone loosened up.

Tuesday, March 27: Jenna Jameson and Clay Aiken. Another odd pair, but they got along great. I loved Clay's sense of humor and Jenna was actually really funny. The whole show was pretty raunchy but didn't go too far, so that was good. Jenna was candid and totally honest about her life and career, which I like in a celebrity. And Clay's little digs were awesome. And I agree, Rihanna, I love you, but your voice isn't on point all the time. There were some tv appearances a while back that were no bueno. Andy, of course, was all googley eyed over Jenna, and he maybe fell in love with her a little bit.

Wednesday, March 28: Ryan Serhant, Fredrik Eklund, and Michael Lorber (AKA the guys from Million Dollar Listing New York). To be honest, I've only see a couple episodes, but these guys are fun, and I am a little in love with Fredrik. I don't know why. Don't judge me. The guys were a little snippy with each other but I think that's just what their chemistry is like. I gotta catch more of their show because apparently there are wallaby and other wild animals on there, which, let's be honest, is a plus.

Thursday, March 29: JB Smoove and Shannon Elizabeth. Very fun show, mostly because of JB's speeches and rants throughout the night. He couldn't give a short answer if his life depended on it, and I'm not complaining. I think he's so funny. And we got a look at Larry David's real life parking garage situation from a couple days ago via TMZ. Shannon was nice and very sweet and played well with Andy and JB. So, a good show and a good way to close out the week.

Sunday, Phaedra and GG will be in the clubhouse. Monday, we have Shannon Doherty and my girl Kristin Chenoweth. On Tuesday, Chris Klein and Tori Spelling are on the show. Wednesday is a Bravo All Star party, who knows what that means, and Thursday, my gurl, Kathy Griffin. I'm definitely calling in on Sunday to talk to GG, Monday for Kristin, Wednesday just because, and absolutely on Thursday to hopefully talk to Kathy. She's one of my inspirations for sure.

Have an awesome weekend, kids!!!

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

Updo! UP! DO!

This week on RuPaul's Drag Race, it was election time, and all the queens put their platforms on the campaign trail. Some took it more seriously than others, with some surprising results. I loved that activist Dan Savage was on hand to critique the gurls' campaign slogans. He is so delightfully drab and dry, it's such a contrast against all the loudness of the show. But he knows his stuff. I love him.

And I have to talk about Michelle Visage's look this week. Sleek, straight-ish, side 'do with a plunging neckline that shows off the star tattoo in between the boobies. What!! You own EVERYTHING, Michelle!!

Oh and someone is coming back a la Carmen Carrera last season. I'm hoping it's Kenya Michaels!!!

Chad: I loved your political character!! It was so funny and so different from what everyone else was doing. I loved the hair and the attitude. I absolutely loved it. And the way you called out the lights! Yellow! Red! Bam! LOL! Your runway look was perfect and so appropriate for the inaugural ball. Or any ball, for that matter. I think we do see your personality, but that's because we see you in the workroom and backstage. I guess the only way to show who you are on the runway is to go back to basics, and wear something that isn't reminiscent of someone else. I really hope you're in the Top 3. I can't wait to see what you do next. Chad's grade for the week: A.

Dida: Your presidential candidate was a little reserved and quiet, which wasn't the best choice. But we've seen this from you before in the infomercial challenge. I just don't think you're comfortable with the whole character thing. You do much better as Dida. Speaking of, I loved your runway dress. And I actually liked the hair. I guess it wasn't inaugural enough for the judges. Your lipsynch was so amazing, by the way. I loved it. On Untucked, you got a special message from your parents, which was really great. Your attitude on your way out was spectacular. You have a great career ahead of you, gurl. Dida's grade for the week: B.

Latrice: I loved your campaign look and your speeches. It was all so regal. That was so good. Your reaction to Phi Phi was understandable, but I think you should have let her have it. I think you internalized your anger and it appeared like you were over the challenge when in fact, you were probably just over her. Your runway look was just alright for me. It looked so much better when you put your bra strap away and took the corset off. During your lipsynch your look really took off for me. Speaking of your lipsynch, tears in my eyes. I loved it. That was so your song to lipsynch. Top 3 with Latrice!! Latrice's grade for the week: B+.

Phi Phi: I could see where you were going with your political character, and some of it was actually funny, but you kind of shot yourself in the foot with the "help" comment. It wasn't that funny, honey. And I'm starting to get really sick of your attitude. You can be pretty without being mean, ok? Your runway look was pretty good, with the white gown and curly hair. The makeup still wasn't as flawless as it should have been. I think of past queens on Drag Race, and your makeup is so severe compared to theirs. I understand that there are different styles of drag, but I think your makeup could be less severe and more polished. That's all I'm saying. Phi Phi's grade for the week: D.

Sharon: You and your 90s business class realness was everything on the political challenge this week. I loved your platform and all your campaign slogans. You were really funny and stayed in character, which is your strong point. I loved your runway look and the fact that Lady Gaga complimented it on Twitter just made it even better. Definitely Top 3. Love you, gurl. Sharon's grade for the week: A.

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I Do Not Recall

This week on Basketball Wives, the fall of Kenya has begun. I'm thinking this is gonna be a real quick decline, much like Meeka's last season. Kenya's not making any friends on this episode and her words are coming back to bite her (surprised? Me neither).

Tami: First, GET WELL SOON! I can't believe you had a mild heart attack this week. I'm sure your fans are keeping you in their thoughts. Now, as for this episode, you cracked me up when she was on the boardwalk with Evelyn talking about the clutch purse debacle. I love when you're joking and laughing. I appreciate you giving Kesha her chance to speak at the beach and actually asked her to stay when she got up to leave. I know you and Kesha still don't see eye to eye, but I think a lot of us would like that to change. I don't blame you for being upset with Kenya. I think everyone is fed up with her at this point. Tami's grade for the week: A.

Evelyn: There was no need to wait outside of Shaunie's birthday party for Jenn, so I'm glad you eventually went home. Again, my favorite scene was you and Tami re-enacting the clutch purse incident just because it was funny. You do make me laugh. I love that side of you. Your conversation with Kesha was actually productive, which really impressed me. When Kenya finally admitted to what she said about you, I thought you were gonna take YOUR shoes off, but you didn't. But hey, there's still next week. Speaking of next week, throwing wine bottles?! Really?! Evelyn's grade for this week: B.

Jenn: I had to laugh at the whole tennis scene. An athlete, you ain't, but at least you admit it. I see where you're coming from with the whole Evelyn thing. She shouldn't have hit you (with a purse or anything else). You make sense when you say you just want it to be over and done with and be in the same room without drama. Unfortunately, Evelyn just isn't that person. She pushes your buttons, and you push her buttons right back. I would make myself scarce around her until her rage dies down. You really know her better than anyone, so it should be no surprise to you that you've got a bullseye on your face (or back of the head, whatever). I don't think it's so bad that you have other friends. That's a non-issue. It's your attitude that's usually the problem. Jenn's grade for the week: C.

Royce: Your advice to Kesha was solid, you were so right. It really could have gone either way between Evelyn and Kesha. Your analogy about running around the circle like a track meet was hilarious and so on point. I loved your blog, as usual. Royce's grade for the week: A.

Suzie: You didn't totally irritate me this week, so I'm giving you a break. You behaved yourself at the tennis game and you actually know how to play! I still don't understand why you have to kiss certain people's ass all the time. But hey, that's just you. Suzie's grade for the week: C.

Kesha: I think you redeemed yourself with a lot of people when you called out Kenya for all the shiz she said about everyone throughout this season. I respect the fact that you walked away from a possible physical altercation with Kenya. I think a lot of people think they need to fight on reality shows to stay relevant, but that's not really true. I dare say it takes more guts to walk away with your dignity. And, on a personal note, I really hope you and Tami work out your differences soon. Kesha's grade for the week: A.

Kenya: Wow. I think you're confused as to what you're supposed to be doing on this show. You think you're supposed to be the new star of the show, but really, you're just supposed to support the main cast mates by showing up to their events. This is not your show. And now, the girls in the circle can't even stand the sight of you. You do talk a lot behind other people's backs, you do switch up your personality, and you do straight up lie. You did tell Kesha that you were cool with her after Tami and Evelyn left and I have no doubt that you called Evelyn loose and probably a lot worse. You sounded like a politician when you were claiming you don't remember what you said. You can get away with that once or twice, but now it's just ridiculous. You have to start taking responsibility for what you've said and done. Own it! None of this "I don't remember" bullsh*t! Just know your place from now on and sit down. Kenya's grade for the week: F.

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Tuesday, March 27, 2012

Self Defense

This week's Bethenny Ever After brought us back to some happier moments - on land! - and also gave us some major mama drama.

First, just to get this out of the way, Bethenny's mother needs to stop. That is all.

Bethenny and Jason work out a few issues in this episode and manage to do so with smiles and laughter, which makes me so happy. The first, their sex life or lack thereof and the correlation that has with their respective bite guards. I love these two when they're being silly. Bite guards, retainers, whatever. Keep that romance alive! Second, the man cave vs the closet. I find it hilarious that the architects and designers all agree the space needs to be used in such a way that it's beneficial for both Bethenny and Jason, but all Jason hears is "no man cave". But, in the end, with some compromising on both parts, (it's not a crime to have a tv in the living room), they both get what they want. Does anyone know if the renovation is done yet?

The funniest scenes are those that feature Team Skinnygirl, of course. You got girls' night our, which I loved,  the self defense class, which was hilarious. And by the way, I'm scared of Dawa now. Then, we have baby CPR - and my new Twitter buddy, Dwayne (@DtheDriver) talking about his kids. Four? Five? It's all good. We know what you mean. And finally, roller skating in the new apartment. How much more fun could you have at work? Awesome!

Speaking of roller skating, I love that Bethenny's best memory is being carefree and soaring over the roller rink floor. Isn't that the best feeling? And she's good at it, too. Of course, she doesn't have many good memories to choose from, but the fact that she's turned all those negative things, which could have kept her down, into this great adventure, is really inspiring.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

I'm Torn

This week's Celebrity Apprentice was a real doozy for me. On one hand, I was proud of Aubrey for standing up for herself and saving her ass from getting fired. But on the other, I can see why she's alienated some of her team mates. First of all, I have probably made the same mistakes Aubrey has, which any woman in her 20s makes when she's in a professional environment with people who are all older than her. We pop off, we shoot out a million ideas without being asked, we take it upon ourselves to be ambassador to all things modern and new. But with that, comes a lot of criticism. We are emotional most of the time. We're not seasoned in our field yet. We have passion, but not enough life experience to back that passion up. So, sometimes we make mistakes, but our intentions are always to succeed.

Having said that, Aubrey did a great job as project manager. She didn't sweat the small stuff, she delegated, and she played to each team member's strengths. Unfortunately, the issue with the branding was too big for the sponsors to ignore. Aubrey made sure to make it clear the sponsors' only issue was with the signage, which was Patricia's task and it was clear on the show, she didn't come through with what Aubrey had requested. Now, I've been to the Adam Carolla school of reality tv, so I was skeptical that some of that footage may have been edited out of sequence for the sake of the storyline. But, it all looked legit to me. So I agree with Patricia going home.

Dayana is contributing more to the tasks, but she needs to be project manager next to prove herself, just like Lou did last week.

Now, for the touchiest subject of them all for me: Lisa and Aubrey's alliance. Clique. Friendship. Whatever you want to call it. I like that two strong ladies are working together and getting things done. That's great. However, I've been on both sides of this. I've been part of the railroaders and I've been a railroadee. Being part of the railroaders, you think you're just getting things done and those who aren't on board must be the ones who have the problem, since you're clearly on the right track. When you're the one being railroaded, it's one of the worst experiences ever. The good thing is, Lisa isn't mean, even when she could be. She saves all the mean for her interviews, which aren't mean at all, but they're funny in her insult comic way. Her imitation of Patricia was priceless. I don't even think Patricia should be mad about it because she was hiding her work - or at least it appeared that way. Anyway, I'm on the fence about Lisa and Aubrey because they're not really mean about what they do. They're up front, and Lisa is honest with everyone and super candid in the boardroom. So, Lisa saves it from being a Mean Girls situation for me.

Clay was an awesome project manager too, and I love his quips about the girls - Aubrey in particular. I think those two queens need to go at it immediately. Werk!!

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

Tick, Tick, BOOM

I can't get over how heartbreaking this week's Mob Wives was. Even if you're not a Renee fan, you couldn't help but sympathize with her. Her whole world crumbled before our very eyes, and I couldn't help but feel guilty that I was watching it happen. Who am I to see this kind of personal tragedy play out on a show I turn to for entertainment? But, I reminded myself, this is reality tv. This is the kind of drama we ask for. Sometimes, it's just too real.

I'll start with the lighter stuff first, and then focus on Renee, if that's ok with you all.

Drita: Punching as flirting? I could get into that! Just kidding ... non-violent is definitely the way to go from now on. I'm sure you want a mature, loving relationship after the drama with Lee, but it has to be hard to date after not having any practice for so long. I wouldn't worry about Lee's acquaintance recognizing you at da club. You weren't doing anything wrong or even risque, so even if Lee does get upset, it's really none of his business now that you're getting divorced. The speed dating was kind of a bust, but at least you and Carla had fun. At this point, I say, focus on your career and the right person will come along when the time is right. Drita's grade for the week: B.

Carla: The date with Joe was so friggin' cute. I kind of do want you two to end up together. He is handsome! Anyway, you look a lot happier, so that's why I'm thinking there still may be something there. I remember last season you were totally done with it. See how quick things change? Carla's grade for the week: A.

Big Ang: Who knew you had been to jail? I love how you said you were a total loser that day. It's your honesty and candor that people respond to, I think, and you gave us plenty in that brief scene at the restaurant. And that scene in the deli with Drita was so interesting. Your 38 year old husband needs to appreciate what he has with you. That's all I'll say about that. We love you. Big Ang's grade for the week: A.

Ramona: You behaved yourself, probably because no one said the D word. I actually enjoy your scenes when you're calm and collected. The rift between you and your father is really sad. I hope you two can patch things up soon. Ramona's grade for the week: B.

Karen: You really showed up for Renee. I respect that a lot. And I'm sure she appreciates it, too. No matter what, you're there for your friends, and that speaks volumes to me about what kind of person you are. I have a lot of respect for you after this episode. Karen's grade for the week: A.

Renee: What can I say? The depression and panic you must have been going through before the infamous letter was almost too much for you. And then, the letter. You were fighting all alone for something that wasn't even there. The fight you have in you is more than most people in the world combined. You weren't going to rest until you got answers. But the answer you got when you called your family was not at all what you expected. I think we saw you physically revert back to that scared little girl who doesn't want her father to be taken away, and we cried with you. We hurt with you. This tribulation isn't over yet on the show, since we'll see the full story of Junior's alleged betrayal of your father in next week's episode. If this low is the catalyst for you taking certain people out of your life forever and putting yourself first, then it will definitely be worth it. We're all rooting for you. Renee's grade for the week: A.

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Just Not Ready

Why did this episode of the Real Housewives of Atlanta fall so flat for me? Sure, there were bright spots, but damn. This season is getting tedious all of a sudden. This will be a short one, kids.

Nene: I love seeing you with your younger son. He's so adorable. I like how you relate to him and ask him to express himself. I love the Mommy side of you. Nene's grade for the week: A.

Kandi: I also love the Mommy side of you with Riley in the store. It was a really cute scene. I admit I am curious about why you didn't go to Aiden's party, unless they said why and I missed it. Kandi's grade for the week: B.

Sheree: I'm a little disappointed that there will be no proposal, but I think it's for the best. There's no reason for your future son in law to break the bank just for an engagement ring. If he can't afford that, chances are he can't afford a full blown wedding either. My only problem with you this week is that you were practically talking him out of it the whole time and then you looked shocked when he told you he wasn't ready. And we get it. You're divorced. Sheree's grade for the week: C.

Phaedra: Like I said last week, you can throw whatever kind of party you want for your baby. It seemed to be a very festive and joyous celebration, so congratulations on that. I won't fault you for going over the top because that's what you like and you freely admit that. Phaedra's grade for the week: A.

Kim: I am happy for you, in the sense that you lucked out big time with Kroy. He obviously loves you and your girls very much, and vice versa. So mazel to you. However, I can't take your personality. It's seriously the screeching halt to all of the episodes for me. I don't think it was ok to be anti-social at the party with Cynthia. There's a way to be civil and polite without going overboard into fake territory. After the party was over, you should have just gone home. What was the point of talking about it in the parking lot, of all places? I'm just glad it was just a conversation and nothing crazy happened. No wig shifting or anything. Kim's grade for the week: D.

Cynthia: I understand why you would want to keep things positive at the party. You didn't want a repeat of Peter's craziness at Kim's baby shower. It didn't really go your way, and you ended up having to deal with Kim in the end in the parking lot. Frankly, I liked that you didn't back down, but it was hilarious when you admitted in your interview that you don't even remember what you said about her. Now, that's comedy. All this hubbub over a simple comment that you don't even recall saying. Oh well. I think it's funny. You apologized and Kim went to smoke a cig. Classy. You win, Cynthia, you definitely win. Cynthia's grade for the week: A

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Thursday, March 22, 2012

Colton's Comeuppance

Survivor was full of twists and turns this week, most notably, Colton fell ill. Literally. He was on the floor, writhing in pain. Later we find out, he's got acute appendicitis, and Kat admits she has no idea what that means. Kat, poor, simple, uneducated Kat. God love her. Colton made sure his appendix affected everyone in the game by taking the hidden immunity idol with him as a souvenir. Is anyone really surprised?! I'm not! He was all about himself from day one. There was no chance in hell he was going to give immunity to anyone on his team.

Speaking of his team, Alicia, sit the eff down and shut the eff up. Oh my God. You have no idea how terribly you're coming across on the show. Of course Colton didn't give you the idol. He was never going to save you. You turned on Christina and you and Colton were downright cruel to her. It's true, you get what you give. I can't wait for you to get your ass voted off the island.

The ice cream reward was torture for someone who's currently watching their diet. That's all I'll say about that.

I will miss Colton's moments of clarity, although few and far between, but I will not miss his whining and disregard for others. If he comes back for another swipe at Survivor, I just hope he's more mature and less bitchy.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

Let's Take the Helicopter!

This week was a nice break from the screaming and yelling on Real Housewives of Orange County. We got to meet some of Heather's friends, who own helicopters! Tamra wants less boobs and Alexis gets less nose. Briana has her surgery with some mixed results. I loved the emotional aspect of this episode because after all, these ladies are human and have feelings just like the rest of us. Now, let's get into it!

Heather: I love that you and your friends want a project and a place to meet and socialize. I actually think it's a pretty good idea. Just make sure you have people working with you that will bring your vision to life and not just take money from you and your friends. Speaking of your friends, they seem very nice and very sweet. And very rich. All good things! I have no doubt the restaurant will be a success, if only for the simple fact that you all will go there and bring more fabulous people there to spend their money. It's kind of a perfect plan. Like I said, though, make sure everything is done to perfection, which I know you will. I like that you have normal-ish friends who aren't all bitchy and catty. Good for you. I also like that you admit that you're not a cook. Too many women pretend like they're master chefs when they aren't. Thanks for owning it. Heather's grade this week: A.

Tamra: Your reactions to Heather's friends was hilarious. On one hand, you were impressed, and on the other, you weren't buying what they were selling at all. LOL! I just think it's funny how you were so turned off by the one who owned the helicopter. So funny. I totally agree with you about taking out the implants. I cannot believe your boobs grow even after a boob job! Who knew?! Simon was an ass to tell you not to take them out. If you want them out, go for it. Tamra's grade for the week: B.

Vicki: I can't even imagine what it was like to see Briana go through that horrible surgery and then not even know if she'll be ok after it's all over. I hope she's ok now. I'm giving you a pass this week because this whole Briana thing is heart breaking. However, I will say this: STOP SAYING LOVE TANK. It's annoying. Vicki's grade for the week: Pass.

Gretchen: Performing with an established act like the Pussycat Dolls would make anyone nervous, so I don't blame you for semi-freaking out while checking out the show. I think you'll do great, by the way. But, I can't get over you setting your hair on fire! Really?! LOL! That was so hilarious. Gretchen's grade for the week: B.

Alexis: The crap they pulled out of your nose is proof enough that your sinuses were legitimately jacked up. Case closed on that. But all that gore and bruising makes me never have a nose job ever ever ever. It looks like it hurts, so I'll be kind and not give you any grief for being a baby about it. I can't handle pain, so I'm no one to judge. Alexis' grade for the week: B.

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Wednesday, March 21, 2012

You Ain't About This Life!

We all know they save the best of the drama for last on these reality shows, and Basketball Wives did just that this week. That birthday party was EVERYTHING!!! And I have a lot to say about all of the ladies so let's just jump right in.

Tami: Like I said last week, I appreciate your side of things. I know where you're coming from, but I do think you should speak to Kesha once you've both had a chance to cool down. You didn't start off on the right foot, but that's ok. You've made up with people before, and I definitely think you can do it again. According to your blog, Kesha has some pull with the producers and the viewers are getting a one-sided account of who she is and what she really is all about. Tell me more! I'm all ears! Back to this week, though. I loved your whole sit-back-and-enjoy demeanor at Shaunie's birthday party and you had a lot to behold that night. You didn't egg Evelyn on when she went off on Jenn, which I thought was smart. You stayed out of it for the most part. I was right there with you with Suzie, though. Of all the ignorant things to say. More on her later. But, you definitely let her know that was out of line without causing a huge scene. I say "Bravo" to you on that. Tami's grade for the week: A.

Suzie: Ignorant. Again. Do you ever think before you speak??? I just can't believe the sh*t you allow to come out of your mouth. You called Kesha's family rednecks, then said they were nice and that you were surprised they aren't racists, then you have to come at Tami with the food stamps line. Seriously??? Buy yourself a clue and get over yourself. You really have no right to talk about anyone's money, because as far as I can tell, you don't have a job. And you're not in broadcast journalism, which you pretended to get into last season. Suzie's grade for the week: F.

Kenya: Your speech was ... not good. I get that you wanted to thank Shaunie for putting you on this show, but you can't help but make an ass out of yourself, can you? Sit down and be quiet. We just can't with you anymore. Kenya's grade for the week: F.

Shaunie: Thank you for having a birthday party, because that was some of the best entertainment I've seen in a long time. I love you for not taking sides, for being a good friend to all the girls in one way or another, and for always being the mediator. I loved you trying to stop Evelyn from going off on Jen. "No! Nope, no she doesn't!" LOL! Shaunie's grade for the week: A.

Royce: You're also a good friend. You went to Tami with your concerns and while she wasn't as receptive as you hoped, you said what you needed to say. I hope you two can continue to be friends because your friendship is REAL, and we love that. You were lovely with Kesha's family, as well. Apparently you weren't invited to Shaunie's party, but I would have loved to get your reaction expressions when the situation between Evelyn and Jennifer popped off. Royce's grade for the week: A.

Kesha: If you are influencing the producers or somehow manipulating what we see, I'm really not ok with that. When you sign up for a reality show, you have to be 100% open, not just open about the parts that make you feel good. So, I really want to know if that's the case. And with Tami, she won't rest till the truth comes out. So you might as well accept it and move on. As for the episode, your family seemed amazing, and I love your mom. I liked the background information about you and the way you grew up. As a mixed girl, I can relate. Just be real with us about EVERYTHING, ok? Kesha's grade for the week: B.

Jennifer: I don't believe a word you say anymore. The whole "Oh my God, did I not invite you? I'm so sorry" bit is just pathetic. How do you not know if you invited someone? Whatever. Then, you take Evelyn's speech and turn it around so you can make a speech directly responding to what she said instead of just toasting to Shaunie and being done with it. Oy. What happened to keepin' it movin'? I don't care who you're friends with. You're full of yourself and you always have been. Maybe it's more apparent to your cast mates now because you're no longer blowing smoke up their asses. You have new friends for that. If I were you, I'd just be happy all you got was a purse smack to the back of the head. It could have been much worse. Jennifer's grade for the week: F.

Evelyn: While your speeches were funny as hell and your purse move was legendary, girl, you know you were out of line. But it was great tv. So I give you credit for that. You said you weren't going to drink that much at Evelyn's party, and then you promptly downed some shots. LOL! That was all kinds of messy. You said what you needed to say to Jenn, contacts and all, but I doubt you felt better at the end of the night. You won't feel better until you draw blood. Evelyn's grade for the week: C (I don't condone violence, but she gets credit for making me laugh.)

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Tuesday, March 20, 2012

So Last Season

Shahs of Sunset took a trip to Vegas for my boy Reza's b-day and it was cray!! These Persians aren't playing around when it comes to partying!!

Heyvoon Bazi!!

Sammy: You're really just along for the ride, so until I get to know you better, I can't grade you. Sorry! Sammy's grade for the week: N/A.

Asa: You really won me over. Taking care of MJ (or trying to) was no easy task. You showed you have a soft side, and that was really nice to see from you. And you made nice with GG! Keep it up! And no, you don't have to change your style. I love that you're different. Asa's grade for the week: A.

MJ: OMG, girl, you were a hot mess. Were you taking your dress off in da club?! I can't believe you weren't hungover for days after that. Slow down with the fire water, ok? I love your fun loving attitude, but you gotta know your limits. MJ's grade for the week: C.

Reza: It's hard when your friends don't get along, but you tried to keep everyone in the partying spirit. I think you succeeded for the most part. I don't blame you for being upset with GG, though. You are still the star, and I love your zingers and catchphrases. Love it! Reza's grade for the week: A.

GG: It's hard not to perceive you as a spoiled brat. When the attention's not on you, you freak out. Not a good look. Why are you so hellbent on trashing other girls? As soon as MJ said something about Anita's dress you should have told her to stop. She was intoxicated at that point. Instead, you kept it going - to the next day! Then you storm off at dinner because everyone's not fawning all over you? Come on, girl, you gotta get a grip. GG's grade for the week: F.

Mike: I think you've got a good heart, but your ego may get you into trouble. I don't know what happened in Vegas, but I hope you get what you're looking for. Everyone wants to either be with you or pair you up, so that must be a good sign! Mike's grade for the week: B.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

She's Dead, I Killed Hah!

The Poconos will never be the same after this week's episode of Mob Wives! The girls did some shooting (at cans and targets). Big Ang and Drita spend some quality time together in the tanning tent before Drita's swimsuit photo shoot. Carla's (ex) husband is finally out of the halfway house. And Renee, well, she's losing it.

OMG!

Karen: I like that you tried to calm Renee down at the bar and at the cabin. That was sweet of you. However, when you talk about your dad's guns, it does seem a little insensitive when you make jokes about what he used them for. I know it's not your fault, and you had no control over what he did with those weapons. But I guess it's the smug way you almost brag about it that can be off-putting. Just my opinion. I was glad that you didn't put Carla in a tough spot when you were talking about Drita. Carla is a good friend. To you and to everyone else. My question is: why do you let Ramona always bring the conversation back to Drita if you all can't stand her so much? Karen's grade for this week: C.

Drita: I love that you seek out positive people like Big Ang to hang out with. The tanning scene was so good. I loved it. I also want to give you credit for doing things to keep yourself out of trouble: boxing, anger management, getting back into modeling, and just staying away from people who trigger your anger. Good job. By the way, you look great. Modeling is definitely the way to go. Although that one bathing suit was a little out there for my taste! Carla had to tell you about what Ramona said, and you flipped out. It was upsetting, but it shouldn't have gotten you so riled up. You know how she is. I don't blame you for emailing Renee with your side of the story about Ramona denying talking about Junior, but you should have left the threats out of it. I know it's hard, but you have to leave all that drama behind and move forward for yourself. Keep it moving and let Ramona sink her own ship. Drita's grade for the week: B.

Ramona: I wish you would stop bringing up Drita for no reason. No one was talking about her at the bar in the Poconos, and you just had to bring her up with Carla. Enough already. Then, when Renee showed you Drita's email, you didn't deny it, you just started attacking Drita and putting all kinds of crazy ideas in Renee's head. And that little smirk you gave as Renee left your place? Don't think we didn't catch that. You know exactly what you're doing. Your problem with Drita is out of control. Maybe you need to go to anger management. Ramona's grade for the week: D.

Renee: You are way too easily influenced. If Ramona was any more inside your head at this point, she'd be coming out your nose. This is not good. You know what kind of person Drita is, and you should know that Ramona's playing you. Hopefully you see it now when you see the look on her face when you leave her house. Cat that swallowed the canary. That's all I'm saying. I'm not looking forward to another breakdown next week, but if that's the catalyst for you breaking free from a bad situation, I'm behind you 100%. I truly hope you've found your happiness. Renee's grade for the week: C.

Carla: I think you and Joe will end up back together. You are so happy he's out of the halfway house and back home. On the couch. LOL! You truly are a good friend to Drita. It must have been tough, but she needs to know Ramona is still running her mouth. And for no good reason! Just keep being on Team Carla, and everyone else will eventually have to face each other instead of going through you all the time. Carla's grade for the week: A.

Big Ang: I'm so sorry to hear about your thyroid problem! I hope it's all better now. For being in your 50s, you have a bangin' bikini bod and you have no reason to be ashamed of it! I love your sense of humor and your fun attitude. You're right, the fighting is out of control. These girls need to take a page from your book and just be fabulous. Big Ang's grade for the week: A.

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You Broke the Rules

WTF!! That is the only thing I can say after watching this week's RuPaul's Drag Race. Ok, I can say a lot more. The girls were paired up with their frenemies after a terrifying polygraph test. The pairs had to perform a live club number about how they don't like each other. Meow! It was a throwback to all those fun duets from yesteryear, like Anything You Can Do from Annie Get Your Gun. Youtube it!

The guest judges were Pamela Anderson, Jennifer Tilly, and RuPaul's music producer Lucian Piane. Lucian is a genius (call me!). Michelle Visage looked amazing, as always, and gave some really good advice to the girls about their performances. And her "Diva" necklace was so good. Pamela joined the gurls in the Gold Bar during Untucked! Such a great show. 

Now, let the music play!

Chad: Your performance with Dida this week was a little subdued, which is not unusual for you. I wish you had kicked up the energy a couple of notches, but you did a great job. I actually loved the combination of you and Dida - you two seemed to have fun together. The outfits were fun, too. I'm so glad you made the Top 5!! Go, mama!! Chad's grade this week: B.

Dida: The energy was working for me, but it didn't quite mesh with Chad's performance. You two should have coordinated a little bit better. Your look was gorgeous, though. I'm so glad you're still here. Dida's grade for the week: B.

Latrice: When you were paired with Willam, at first, I was scared you would be in the bottom 2, but you won! Both of you won, to be fair, but you turned that performance OUT! Willam's antics only worked because you were the perfect counterpart. Everything he did, you did the opposite, and it worked. The energy was there and the performance was great. And I loved seeing you in a corset! WERK! I'm so happy that you made it to the Top 5 - the finale is so close. I want you in the Top 3, hunty! Latrice's grade for the week: A.

Phi Phi: Every time I think you're making progress, you gotta bring me back to reality. You're kind of a mean girl! At least on the show, I know how editing can be. But seriously, you had absolutely nothing positive to say. Some of it, I agree with - like how Willam should have been kicked off sooner for breaking the rules, whatever that means. Some of it, I don't - like your digs at Sharon. You won last week because you were focused. This week, you were all over the damn place. Get your sh*t together, or you may end up in 5th place. Phi Phi's grade for the week: C.

Sharon: I loved you this week. You cried and you were hurt by the judges comments, but you know you're a star. This week didn't go your way, but that lipsynch was EVERYTHING. You kept your shoes ON and your face GOING! I actually got a little emotional watching you go for it. I can't tell you how much I want you in the Top 3. I'm a Sharon Needles fan for life. Sharon's grade for the week: A.

Willam: Whatever you did, you apparently owned up to it, so I give you credit for that. I've been trying to figure out what you did all day. Date a Drag Race staffer? Go out clubbing? Steal some Iron Fist shoes? Hit on Santino? I cannot wait to find out what it is. Until then, I hope you learned your lesson. You gotta follow the rules if you wanna win the game. Your performance this week was great, so it was even more shocking that you were ultimately sent home. Cute corset, too. See ya later, Willam. Willam's grade for the week: D.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

My Ship Has Sailed

We finally got to see the infamous boat trip from hell on this week's Bethenny Ever After. It was pretty rough, but I'm glad to see Jason and Bethenny got through it without ripping each other to pieces. The episode picked up where we left off last week, Jason walks away from the dock in a huff after a verbal argument with Bethenny. She says she's going on the trip with or without him and asks him what he's going to do. He gets on the helicopter and I think that was the best decision he could have made. Can you imagine how bad it would have been if he hadn't went on the trip? Regardless of whether the boat would've gone off course or not, it would have symbolized that he's really not invested - or that when things get tough, he can't handle it.

Thankfully, while on the boat, Jason gets some one on one with Dr. Amador, and some revelations actually do happen. Like when Jason says he likes to push Bethenny's buttons because he loves her, Amador quickly replies that that's not why he pushes her buttons at all. He pushes her buttons because he's hurt about something and it's the easiest way to make it known. Very true.

Jason then gets sea sick and can't make dinner for the group as planned. Bethenny steps in and cooks the dinner while checking on Jason frequently. I think Bethenny behaved herself and was really patient with Jason. She didn't snap at him, although one under-the-breath comment did slip out at one point. But hey, she's not a saint, people.

Then, the real trouble starts when the trip is an hour behind schedule and Amador breaks the news that the GPS is broken. Really?! The other couple on the trip is asleep, since they were sleeping in shifts, so Jason and Bethenny are the lucky ones who get to be awake during this crisis. Amador, of course, is completely calm. I loved how Bethenny and Jason were able to discuss some of their issues while this is all going on.

The boat analogy really does apply to not only marriage, but relationships of all kinds. If you focus on the tiny problem right in front of you, you may miss the huge, beautiful bigger picture all around you.

Finally, after many, many hours of waiting, the towing boat arrives. Now this is the next day. Like, there's sunshine and it's not like early morning sunshine. We're talking noon, at least. Once everyone is off the boat, the lessons start to really sink in. Bethenny and Jason look happy to be on dry land - back with Brynn - and you can almost see them look at each other differently.

Let's hope Amador comes through on those discounts for upcoming therapy sessions.

Now, if this was fake, they should all get an Emmy, a Tony, and an Oscar, because it all seemed real to me. Even Amador walking in on Bethenny peeing. Who hasn't had that happen to them? It's horrible!

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

The Claws are Out!

This week's Celebrity Apprentice was especially catty, thanks to Aubrey O'Day. She really brought the shade this week and she was not afraid to use it. Although I don't agree with everything she said, it was pretty damn funny.

The challenge was to make a viral video for a glorified Swiffer, except it wasn't a Swiffer. These tasks are getting more and more annoying as the show goes on. Let's have some fun ones, like serving lunch at a crowded diner or cleaning hotel rooms! Just kidding. Sort of.

The men's project manager was Lou Ferrigno, and he had to prove himself this week. After complaining about not being used to his full potential, all eyes were on him to hit this one out of the park. Lucky for him, the men won. Penn Jillette was a little hesitant to back up Lou on all of his ideas, but it's just a difference of opinion. I really didn't see him sabotaging or screwing up the task in any way. Clay and Penn had a heart to heart which really went nowhere, but Clay made his point that Penn wasn't being a team player in some instances. But none of that matters because they won.

The ladies were a total mess as usual. This sucks so bad. I hate that these women are self destructing. Here's what went down. Tia volunteered to be project manager, but really didn't make any decisions or come up with any ideas on her own. She had the "group" decide everything together, which really just means one person does all the work and everyone else agrees with it. Lisa took the lion's share of the work on the video and although Tia did a lot with the production, she had no control over the group. Dayana was complaining that she wasn't in the presentation enough, and that set Lisa off on a rant about egos. Lisa's right, but the girls set Dayana up to think she was always going to be the face of all the presentations. She doesn't come up with good ideas, so there's really no other use for her. She can't even order flowers without help. Come on. So they lose the challenge because their concept is just not right for the product, and Tia and Aubrey get into it. Aubrey states Tia can't handle it because she's so much younger than her and is so much better than her. Really?! Wow! Hilarious ... Tia is a graceful swan and tells Trump she wants to take responsibility for the loss as long as he won't fire anyone else. He doesn't and fires Tia. She couldn't be more relieved. All of the people coming off of this show are so happy to be sent home I'm starting to wonder if it could possibly be more of a nightmare than it appears to be on tv.

I really want Lisa to put Aubrey in her place (lovingly, since they're buddies) and tell her to calm down. That would be great.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

Monday, March 19, 2012

If Money Grew on Trees

The Real Housewives of Atlanta was really good this week. LOTS and lots going on, so I'm excited to blog about the episode. I'm just gonna dive right in!

Bam!

Kandi: I LOVE your song with Jo Dee Messina. It is awesome. And I'm not even a huge country fan. But that song is a hit. I love it. I'm so proud of you for achieving your goal of getting into country music - I think you're definitely going to have lots of success in that genre. I also appreciated the fact that you and Kim made up. Kim is not my favorite person, but you didn't do anything wrong and you told the truth when asked, so it was nice to see you two patch things up. Kandi's grade for the week: A.

Sheree: Congrats on your daughter's upcoming engagement! I understand why her boyfriend/fiancee talked to her father first, even though he's not really in her life right now. It's a guy thing. Of course he was going to speak to you as well. He seems like a good guy. I wish them the best. But, I will ask that you not be so negative about marriage just because yours ended badly. I agree that a woman should make her own money, though. Speaking of ... what exactly do you do for work again? Just asking! Sheree's grade for this week: B.

Nene: I feel for you with this divorce. You are in a great place professionally, but your marriage is still in a terrible place. It has to be hard to get so much success all at once without that partner by your side to share it with. However, I think you're sending out mixed signals regarding John. I think it was in last week's show where you called him your man or your boo or something like that. Then you claim he's not your boyfriend. So, I'm a little confused. Nene's grade for the week: C.

Cynthia: You go, girl! I loved your discussion with Mal. I applaud you for standing your ground and not backing down. You are so right. She wants to badmouth your marriage and your husband while she has troubles of her own?! I don't think so! I think some people may say you were harsh with her, but in reality, you said what you needed to say and you didn't hit below the belt. But you let her know, the bullsh*t stops now. She apologized, you accepted, and hopefully, you all can move forward from this. Cynthia's grade for the week: A.

Phaedra: That baby's birthday party was over the top, just like the baby shower, so no one should be surprised. I've learned you can't really say anything about how people want to celebrate their child, so I'm just going to say it was elaborate for a one year old who's not going to remember it. So, really, it's more for you and the other adults there. More specifically, it's about showing off. There. I said it. And Dwight is getting sloppy in his old age! "Last but least"??? Really?! I liked Apollo's speech, I thought he did an awesome job. I'm sure through the magic of editing it looked like you were late, but I have a feeling you were either on time or not as late as it may have seemed. Phaedra's grade for the week: C.

Kim: Good for you for putting your friendship with Kandi back together. I can't understand why you didn't do it sooner, but hey, better late than never. I love how you call Cynthia crazy and passive aggressive. Um ... check the mirror, sweetheart. But I digress. I would say keep up the positivity, but we all know that's not gonna happen. Kim's grade for the week: C.

Marlo: Thank you for coming clean with Lawrence. Your explanation still wasn't 100% truthful, but with you, I'm sure people will just take any kind of apology they can get. Marlo's grade for the week: B.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

Friday, March 16, 2012

Hello, We're Persian!

I finally watched Shahs of Sunset and I was completely blown away. We got catfights, shooting ranges, pool parties, real estate drama, and more all in the first episode. I am absolutely going to keep watching. I'm not going to give grades just yet, since I still need to feel the cast out. But next week, I'll definitely start the grading!

The star, for me, is Reza. I love his candor and his humor. He can be over the top and give a little too much information, but he does it with humor - so you know it's all good for me. He's like the narrator and the one that guides us through all the drama. Basically, we see the whole thing through his eyes. Or at least I do.

The girls are all crazy - in a good way. I LOVE MJ!!! She is my girl!! I'm not so sure about Asa and GG yet. But, I'm willing to give them a chance.

The guys are alright. Mike is definitely hot and his story is interesting. Sammy knows how to throw a party, that's for sure.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

Spring Break

Watch What Happens Live is off on vacation next week, so I wanted to briefly recap this week's episodes and let you all know what I thought of the guests! 

Sunday, March 11: Reza from Shahs of Sunset and Nene Leakes were SO MUCH FUN together. It was a really great show. Reza is vivacious and outrageous and even made Nene blush a couple of times. I love his personality. He and Nene were a good team. Very good show. 

Monday, March 12: Nicole Richie and Sean Avery. Um. I could have done without this show all together. Nicole was ok, but Sean looked bored and acted as if the show were beneath him somehow. This guy clearly didn't want to be there. It was so awkward. Painful to watch. I literally couldn't wait for it to be over. 

Tuesday, March 13: Bridesmaids and Reno 911 star and one of my all time favorite funny ladies, Wendi McClendon-Covey was in the clubhouse!! And Vicki Gunvalson was there too. Not that I don't like Vicki, but come on, Wendy's the star of that duo. Vicki was clearly up for a good time and didn't even get mad when Miss Piggy visited and chatted a bit. That was so funny, because you could see Andy trying to read whether Vicki was offended or not. I actually think Vicki can be fun sometimes. Just don't ask her about Slade anymore! We're over it!! 

Wednesday, March 14: Another favorite funny lady of mine, Kristen Johnston, and Jeff Lewis, with Jenni Pulos as the bartender totally made the show for me. Those three had a friggin' blast. Kristen talked about her book, Guts, which I cannot wait to read, and Jeff talked about the show and had some hilarious back and forth with Kristen. Totally awesome show. 

Thursday, March 15: Big Ang (my girl!) and Cee-Lo were in the clubhouse and they were actually a really good combination. Big Ang was a little on the quiet side at first, but soon enough she was cracking jokes and having a blast. Cee-Lo always gives good talk and the game they played was hysterical. I love me some Voice chair turning realness. Really fun show. 

I can't wait for Andy to come back from vacation!! Check out the After Shows, since they're always a lot of fun. 

Another Leak

I love Jeff Lewis' new show, Interior Therapy! It is everything I love about Flipping Out, just more focused. We get one family, one project, and all the drama. What more could you ask for?

In the premiere episode, Felice and Michael want a better master bedroom and bathroom. After a lot of setbacks at first, they got that and a lot more. The best thing about Felice and Michael is how tightly wound they are. They actually quoted their marriage vows, where Michael promised to leave all decorating choices to Felice. She wasn't joking. She didn't want his input on not one goddamned thing. However, Jeff made sure Michael's aesthetic was fairly represented in the design. They actually got a bed they both liked! Which, if you saw the show, seemed to be an impossible feat.

But, the real joy came from watching my favorite odd couple, Jeff and Jenni, interact. It's always half jokes and half bickering with them. And it makes for great tv. Zoila stopped by, and make me laugh, as usual. Jeff dealing with the kids was so hilarious. I love when he's being silly.

Make sure you watch Interior Therapy next Wednesday night on Bravo, where Jeff tries to help a hoarder. What?! And check out clips from the show here.

What did you think of this show? Tweet me!

Love You, Shore House!

The finale of Jersey Shore aired last night, and it was a little bittersweet for me. Even if the show comes back next season, it won't be the same. I hope they just do the spinoffs and let this be the end. The reunion, by the way, airs next Thursday. Can't wait.

Wah!

Snooki: You were the last one out of the house, which is fitting, since you're the big star of the show. We all know this. I loved when you said you could go back to the shore house forever. Now that you're pregnant and engaged, that's probably no longer the case, but your heart and soul came through on this show. And I'll defend Snooki right here, right now. She came on this show as a fun loving party girl who just wanted to fall in love, she was real with us and showed us what partying on the shore is, and she was genuine about who she was. The girl was just being honest. And funny! Girl has an awesome sense of humor. I just hate it when people hate on her when you know they've knocked back a few too many shots in their day, too. Snooks is all grown up now, and I wish her the best, and appreciate the many laughs she's given me on Jersey Shore. But, back to the finale. Nicole and Mike are getting along again (?) and he tells her a secret about Deena's sister. Ugh. Snooki was right to tell Mike not to talk about it and she was right to tell Deena. If someone were talking about my sister that way, I would want to know. Snooki's a good friend. Ok, ok enough Snooki love for one season, I'm sorry. Snooki's grade for the week: A.

Deena: You were kind to let the whole thing go with Mike and your sister. I would have punched his lights out. Seriously. I loved how committed you were to the water balloon fight. OMG! That looked like so much fun. You guys really went at it. I'm gonna defend you too right now. I love that you're just yourself all the time, no apologies, no excuses. I appreciate that you're pretty much a happy person all the time. And you're funny as well! I can't stress how much I love a girl with a sense of humor. I love anyone with a sense of humor, really. I hope you get your own show, maybe a Bethenny-esque type show where you balance your new relationship with your businesses? Just a thought. Merp! Deena's grade for the week: A.

JWOWW: I thought it was so funny that you weren't pissed off about the prank. You're the same girl who clocked Mike in the face without any hesitation. Well, wouldn't we all? Anyway, I think you've mellowed out a lot over the course of the show's run, and it's nice to see you just happy. You and Roger are so adorable together. I can't wait to see the spinoff with you and Snooks. I think it's going to be funny. Probably not a wild and crazy time now that you're both in stable relationships, but I can watch a best friend show like nobody's business. When you get two friends together, it's always a good time. JWOWW's grade for the week: A.

Sammi: Your speech at dinner was so nice! I love that you had one awesome summer and you weren't fighting the whole time. We know you're still the diva, but you've come around to where you're a fun diva. Like Gloria Estefan. It was bittersweet to see you leave with Ron, knowing you two ultimately couldn't work it out. But, at least you're still friends according to Ron on the Hook Up. I appreciated your cool new attitude. I can see you modeling and doing something with fashion and beauty. I would love to see you become a true fashionista. Sammi's grade for the week: A.

Vinny: Ugh. I swear, you have the weirdest taste in women. I get there's a certain fantasy checklist and you got to knock one off your list with your little stunt on this episode, but it was just ... blah. At this point, I wish you would have shed more light on overcoming your anxiety, or at least managing it, and your decision not to drink. That's what would have been interesting. Not trying to hook up with random girls all the time. That's not what cured your anxiety, my friend. Vinny's grade for the week: C.

Pauly: You have so much fun in this house, it's hard to be mad at you. But if you screamed at me to wake up every day, you'd be a dead man. Can't wait to see your spinoff! Pauly's grade for the week: B.

Ronnie: Thank you for being so much fun this season. The one liners, the looks, the laughs. It was all good. Good luck with the Ron Ron Juice business, buddy. And I'm glad you and Sam are still friends. Ronnie's grade for the week: A.

Mike: You had to stir the pot one last time. Ok. Lucky for you, it didn't blow up in your face. I can't wait to see you get blasted at the reunion. Maybe it'll be the wake up call you need to finally drop the act and just be a normal person. The fact that you threw a fit about your stuff being put outside (how old are you?!) just shows you're a child in a man's freakishly fit body. Grow up. Mike's grade for the week: F.

What did you think of the finale? Tweet me!

Thursday, March 15, 2012

And More B*tch!

I can't believe I almost forgot to blog about Basketball Wives this week! It wasn't the most exciting episode, but there were some awesome moments, courtesy of, (who else?) Tami! We got some serious tension brewing between all of the girls, which makes for awesome tv.

Let's begin!

Kesha: You stuck your foot in your mouth like five different times this week. I don't think you're a back stabber  or anything like that, you're just not aware of how you're coming off to people. First, you tell Evelyn, of all people, how you're feeling about Tami. Mistake #1. Then, you beg the girls to behave at your charity event, then criticize them for not having fun. Mistake #2. Lastly, you didn't stand up to Tami and defend yourself well enough at dinner. Mistake #3. Seriously, I like you, but you should have just talked to Royce about how to get along with Tami. Royce is the only person on that cast that wouldn't have sold you out. Now, you're on the outs with Tami, but don't worry. She may come around. Kesha's grade for the week: C.

Evelyn: I don't even expect you to not talk about people behind their backs, that's who you are. But it was funny how quickly you turned against Kesha - that must have been a record! Like I said, I don't really expect anything more from you. Right now, you have Tami and Shaunie and you need them, so of course, you're not going to take the newcomer's side over Tami. I think it's great that you and Tami are cool again, and I can't wait to see you lunge for Jennifer every time you see her. Evelyn's grade for the week: D.

Jennifer: I did feel a little sorry for you when only Suzie and Kenya showed up to your launch party. And then I remembered, you're not a very good friend! So, you shouldn't have been surprised at all! I really can't blame the girls for not going. Plus, some weren't even invited. Let's be real. Jennifer's grade for the week: D.

Kenya: Your music video is finally done, so I hope we're done hearing about it. It was actually pretty decent. It was nice of you to show up for Jennifer. But I have a feeling you'd show up to a gas station if someone told you there was going to be a party there. Watching you crack up when Tami was blasting Kesha was hilarious, but absolutely mean. You just couldn't contain your joy that you weren't on the hot seat. Kenya's grade for the week: D.

Tami: I totally understand why you were upset with Kesha. You definitely could have settled it with her a different way, but hey, no one's perfect. I can't stand it when people have a problem with someone but tell everyone else but that person. It is infuriating. I can't help but laugh when you go after someone and hammer them into the ground (verbally), even though it wasn't very nice at all. Hopefully, you'll give Kesha another chance because she seems like a really good girl. Tami's grade for the week: C.

Royce: You weren't on very much this episode, hopefully we'll see more of you next week. Royce's grade for the week: N/A.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!

None of Your Business

The 80s raged on with the Real Housewives of Orange County this week. The Bunko (Bunco?) party from hell continues with Gretchen and Vicki finally going at it over Slade's comedy routine. But the fights don't end there. A defensive Alexis gets snippy with Heather, Tamra, and Gretchen over her upcoming nose job/sinus surgery. Then, Briana goes in for her surgery hoping for the best. We got to see Don this week, and he looks great and seems to be happy - or as happy as possible while going through a divorce. We miss you, Don!

So, let's dive right in, shall we?

Alexis: I think you took the snickering and laughing as a jab at you because you're still not trusting of Tamra and Heather. The fact that they even mentioned your surgery was going to set you off regardless. I'm not saying it's right, but that's probably where you were coming from. Wanting Gretchen to always jump up and defend you is not really mature, though. You stood up for yourself and she wasn't taking sides. I don't know what else you expect her to do when she's in the middle - literally. I say, let them laugh. Do what you want and don't pay attention to what anyone (especially Tamra) has to say. Alexis' grade for the week: C.

Gretchen: You went to bat for Slade in a major way this week. Not only did you defend yourself and make it clear you didn't sign off on the "comedy" bit, but you slammed Vicki with the whole Brooks is a deadbeat dad thing. I loved it when you were able to stand up and say that Slade was never any of Vicki's business either. That was great. But did she get it? Of course not. You're not going to be able to get anywhere with her, so it's best to just drop it. I think you were a good friend to Alexis, but because she's so needy, it's never enough. You're just in one tough spot after another, kiddo. Gretchen's grade for the week: B+.

Vicki: I feel for you. You are going through a lot. But you have got to start listening to other people. For example, you didn't get what Gretchen was trying to say at all. You kept repeating that you don't condone a man who doesn't support his kids - but yet, you're dating someone who has that same issue in his past. Don't you think Slade would have been in jail by now if everything you're saying is true? And beyond that, why is it your concern in the first place? You can dislike someone and keep your opinion to yourself about them. It is possible. And it's ridiculous that you would expect people to NOT talk about Brooks when you talk about EVERYONE. It's karma, and you're face to face with her. Do yourself a favor and stop talking and start listening. When Briana says it's always about you no matter what, that's a big problem. Especially when she's the one who might have cancer. Think about it. Vicki's grade for the week: F.

Tamra: It's almost as if we have two Tamra's. The good friend who brings coffee and doesn't want people to fight at her party, and the mean girl who tells someone who's insecure about their nose that their nose is big. Wow. I do think you're a good friend, but I also think you're a mean girl who likes to talk sh*t. There's nothing wrong with that, but it won't keep too many friends around. I think you say what you need to say to Vicki and you say what you need to say to everyone else. Is that being bipolar? Or just fake? I guess it all depends on the intention behind it. And with you, I'm never quite sure. Tamra's grade for the week: D.

Heather: Your expressions were priceless this week. I love that you wanted to make it right with Alexis, but let's be real, you guys were kind of laughing at her. Or maybe at the idea of someone saying it's a sinus surgery when it's really a nose job, and she just happened to be the person that inspired the conversation. Either way, I don't think you were being malicious at all. And yes, these women really do act like this. You weren't there last year for the drink throwing and pushing. Oh yeah. Heather's grade for the week: B.

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Body Made Wrong!

RuPaul's Drag Race always lifts my spirits and makes me laugh, but this week, I was LOL'ing like there was no tomorrow, hunty! My favorite of favorites, the Reading mini-challenge. Now, I recently watched Paris is Burning, the legendary documentary about all things drag, and let me tell you, I finally get most of RuPaul's references! Not all, but most. You have to watch it if you haven't yet, you can stream it on Netflix.

Now, let's get into that Reading mini-challenge, yes? Because READING IS FUNDAMENTAL! And funny! The winner was clearly Latrice, who annihilated the competition with lines like, "B.M.W. Body. Made. Wrong!", "Two words: Sideshow Freak", and "by the hairs of your chinny, chin, chin." That was some good reading right there. The other girls had bright spots too. I loved Chad's reading, especially her giving Jiggly her dentist's business card. Willam was funny - Phi Phi does "snag" the camera from a certain angle! And speaking of Phi Phi, you know, her, you know, reading was, you know, not good. Jiggly had some zingers, including her Forever 41 line (which she's said before just FYI) and telling Willam her face is marble, sh*t don't move. Dida's read on Jiggly being with child was cute, I thought. My girl Sharon hit it on the head when she said Jiggly smokes HAMS after sex! LOL! That mini-challenge gave me all kinds of life. Latrice, as the winner, doled out the magazine titles for the girls' main challenge. They have to design a cover for their magazine, complete with article headlines and a gorgeous cover photo of themselves.

The library is OPEN!

Chad: Your cover photo wasn't quite "Eleganza". I imagined a Vogue-type concept, but you wanted to show the judges you could be more raw and not always polished. You accomplished that. You had me laughing in the mini-challenge, and I loved your runway look. You always turn the party. Chad's grade for the week: B.

Dida: You had a hard time with your magazine, entitled "Tastes Like Chicken". You went literal with it, which wasn't a bad choice, but it wasn't a winner, either. I think you should have gone a totally different route. It should have been everything BUT chicken, but at the end of the day, it all "Tastes Like Chicken". You could have even gone a little dirty with it. But, I commend you for sticking to your guns and seeing it through your way. Your runway dress was fabulous, but you do need to work on your proportions. Give us body! Not just those luscious legs! We want it all! Your heart to heart with Jiggly on Untucked was really emotional. You were right to be honest with her and give her some tough love. You're a good friend. Dida's grade for the week: C.

Jiggly: I don't know if you forgot, but you're in a competition. Yes, some of the girls are friendly with you, but damn, you can't expect them to tell you how to win! Chad was the only one who was real with you about your magazine, and instead of listening to her, you chose to take Phi Phi's advice. Oy. Your humor is your sword, sweetie! I hope you've grown from the competition and gotten more confidence in yourself. The whining days are over and this is the beginning of the rest of your life. Now, sashay away. Jiggly's grade for the week: D.

Latrice: Condragulations on winning the mini-challenge! You were huh-larious. I loved every second of it. I don't care why you gave the magazine titles out the way you did. Who cares. It's a competition. Unfortunately, your cover wasn't really gossip rag, but I think at a certain point you forgot all about the magazine and just enjoyed your time with the pit crew. Oh well! Your runway dress was pretty and I liked the jewelry. I don't know where Santino got Rent-A-Center from. And your bracelet breaking was so not the business. You had an off night, but you're still in it to win it. Please, please make sure you call Santino a balding bitch next time he says something you don't like! That would make my year. Latrice's grade for the week: B.

Phi Phi: Shady, shady! I thought you were being nice from now on! Gurl, you put your shady ways to work for you when you convinced your "friend" Jiggly to go the serious route with her magazine. I hope you're proud of yourself because you won the main challenge! So, on one hand, good for you, on the other, I don't think you really want to win that way. Your runway look was cute and I think you're hitting your stride with the judges. Phi Phi's grade for the week: C.

Sharon: I love your sense of humor and you really went for it with your cat magazine. It was so funny. I loved your runway look, too. It was like Michelle Visage and you had a love child who became a Vegas stripper. I friggin' loved it. Your reading was so much fun, too. I truly enjoyed you this week! I do agree with the judges, I'd like to see your real eyes (no contacts) on the runway at least once. And thanks for owning up to the fart on stage. LOL! Sharon's grade for the week: A.

Willam: The interior design magazine should have been a home run for you but you decided that "sex sells." I think you should have been a Martha Stewart type and made it a real parody instead of an excuse to get naked. Anywhoo, you had to lipsynch for your life, and of course, you showed your ass. Really. Like we saw your ass cheeks again. I hope you start to take the judges' advice and paint your face better and go above and beyond in challenges. Show us why you're a big tv star! Willam's grade for the week: C.

Regina King and Pam Tillis were the guest judges. I love me some Regina King, with those beautiful braids! I was living for her. She seemed to have a lot of fun with the queens. Pam was a little quieter but her song for the lipsynch brought me back to the 90s and watching that music video on tv when I was little. Michelle's hair this week was ah-mazing in this sculptured updo. She looked gorgeous. Santino was his usual biting self. And RuPaul's runway look was a prom dress for the ages - perfection.

Just Talk About It

Bethenny Ever After picks up right where the drama left off last week. There is so much going on - the renovation is still underway, with the contractor butting heads with the design team, Bethenny butting heads with Jason, and Julie having a moment. Oh, and Bethenny's planning the boat trip with the therapist, since Jason apparently finally agreed to go.

The helicopter scene was no friggin' joke. The entire episode was basically leading up to that fight on the tarmac. Here's what I think went down: the birthday weekend Bethenny planned for Jason was amazing. He loved it, and then, suddenly, he didn't. Because his parents weren't there. However, Bethenny states she made it so that Jason would have a couple of days with his parents before the big weekend. Somewhere along the line, someone (his mom? or dad) put a bug in his ear that they should have been at the actual birthday festivities. Long story short, Jason was no longer happy with the arrangements. Ok. I would have probably blown a gasket. We have to remember Bethenny is not a big family get together person, and she doesn't feel the need to have family around all the time. That's why she can go two months without seeing her in-laws and it doesn't phase her. It's not that she doesn't like them, she just doesn't need to be around them all the time. Jason should have clearly stated what he wanted for his birthday and made it happen. Bethenny should have just assisted in making his birthday exactly what he wanted. Period. No more surprises, no more getaways. You get what you get and that's it. 

But of course, it's not about the birthday itself. As they say, it's never about what it's about. The tension was already there, the birthday was just the occasion that brought it out in the open. Jason seems to be frustrated and not exactly thrilled about being merely a consultant on the Skinnygirl brand and the apartment renovation. He wants his career back. And who can blame him? However, after being SO supportive in the beginning, it is a little disappointing that he would just now realize he wants to be more than just Bethenny's husband. And we all know he's so much more than that. He's a successful guy in his own right. I just don't understand why he's being so passive aggressive in some of these scenes. I say, pull back from Skinnygirl and do your own thing. 

The fight before the boat trip is intense. I hate the fact that Bethenny brings it up as their waiting to go on this workshop designed to help them work out their issues. But I have been there. You feel something, you try to hold it in, and the next thing you know, the words are coming out of your mouth. And then, it's out there. You can't take it back. So, she asks for an apology for some pretty hurtful comments from Jason ("you're going to end up alone" - yeah, that one deserves some kind of apology), and she doesn't get one. They have a brief moment of maybe getting it resolved and Bethenny says she does have a problem with people thinking Jason is the perfect husband (because NO ONE is perfect), and Jason says he's done and bolts. We know he comes back because somehow he ends up on the boat with her, but in that moment, he's left. Just like everyone else in her life. It's hard not to think that Bethenny's just repeated the cycle of pushing people away or having people leave her when she needs them the most. 

What I took away from this exchange is that there is no point in trying to communicate with someone who has already shut down completely. Jason was against the boat trip in the first place, then decided to go, then found an excuse to leave. At this point, I would say Jason needs therapy the most out of the two of them. He really needs to learn to open up and be able to see his actions objectively instead of getting defensive. Bethenny's statements weren't terrible and she was telling him how she felt when he said certain things. She said she needed an apology before moving forward. Instead of looking at it from her perspective, he threw his walls up. 

They're apparently doing a lot better now, but incidents like this are wake up calls. Don't let it get any worse. Be open with each other. This is serious. Talk about it NOW. And if you can't talk about it, at least let the other person know that you WILL talk about it once you've calmed down. 

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Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Disrespectful

The Real Housewives of Atlanta on Sunday night was full of family drama and outbursts. Making it one hell of an episode! Everyone is dealing with some kind of turmoil, and some issues are more easily resolved than others. At the risk of sounding corny, I hope all the ladies are able to overcome the obstacles (self-imposed or not) and rise up to a better place by the time the season ends.

So let's get started!

Kim: The whining about Sweetie is just as annoying as Sweetie is lazy. Your hair stylist is right - let her go. Also, if you wear wigs, do you really need a hair stylist? Just asking. You really need to draw the line between business and home. It would be a lot easier to keep an employee in line if you actually had work to do. We should see you designing wigs or baby clothes or something instead of just hanging out at your house in every episode. We get it, you have a baby, and there's editing involved. But some of the other ladies have showcased their businesses on the show, so why don't you do the same? Kim's grade for the week: D.

Cynthia: I totally agree with you - your sister is out of line, but so is Peter. It's one thing to dislike your in-laws, but it's another to constantly be at war with them. Both Mal and Peter are wrong for what they do to each other. The limo fiasco was a sign: don't have big parties anymore. Not only for financial reasons, but for your sanity. It's just not worth it! I am upset you had to chip in for the party, but not surprised. However, it was none of Mal's business. She needs to back off. You're a grown woman and you're married and it's your life. She may not like it, but that doesn't give her the right to tell you AT YOUR PARTY that she didn't think you and Peter would make it to a year of marriage. That's a slap in the face. If she didn't believe in your marriage, SHE SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN THERE. Your mom said the same, and it upset me as well. I think Mal is probably behind your mom's opinion of Peter, to be honest. Either way, they shouldn't have shown up if they weren't going to celebrate your anniversary with you. Peter was wrong to single Mal out. I'm sorry you're still dealing with this foolishness. I think it's time for you and Peter to talk about respect - just because you CAN do something (call Mal out), doesn't mean you SHOULD. I commend you for sticking by your husband, since he is your family now, and your sister is just going to have to grow up and deal with it. Cynthia's grade for the week: B.

Nene: I liked that you and Gregg took on the Bryson problem together as co-parents, even though Gregg is not his biological father. I hope Bryson is doing better now. I enjoyed you at the anniversary party. You seemed to be having a fabulous time and OWNED it! LOL! Nene's grade for the week: A.

Phaedra: I'm glad you're so interested in learning the embalming part of being a funeral home director/owner, hell, you're the one that's going to have to touch the dead bodies. I applaud you for taking the class and being so eager to learn. I know I couldn't do it. Phaedra's grade for the week: A.

Marlo: All I can say is, you lied to Lawrence about saying the "F" word. That's all there is to say. Marlo's grade for the week: F.

Sheree: You're not off the hook, honey. You are one busy lady, telling everyone what everyone else said on the South Africa trip. I'm just wondering when you're going to start telling on yourself for a change? Shady! You are not perfect, so this whole tattle-tale business you're running is getting really old. I understand telling Lawrence that Marlo said the "F" word ONLY because he's friends with her and he should be able to go and talk to her about it WITHOUT YOU. You're not the peace maker, you're the sh*t stirrer. But sooner or later, the sh*t is going to come right back around to you. Sheree's grade for the week: D.

Kandi: We hardly saw you this week! But next week, we'll see you defend yourself yet again against Kim. She just can't let go of your alleged comment, which we've already established wasn't what Sheree said it was. Kandi's grade for the week: N/A

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Anger Management

Mob Wives got plain old silly on me this week. There's not much to say but I do have some choice words for the ladies. But before we begin, do you think all this arguing and fighting will go anywhere? Or will it just devolve into chaos by the time the season is over? Whose side are you on?

I'm actually getting a little tired of it all right now. How about you?

Drita: Anger management can only help you at this point. I liked that you mentioned fixing things with Karen. However, you're right about Ramona not allowing that to happen. I think you have a good heart and honestly don't want to fight with anyone, but for some reason, the drama always seems to come back to you, courtesy of Ramona. I think it's sad that you're really the only one working on your anger issues. It shows you're serious about changing, and I respect that. Also, when you told Renee about what Ramona said, I remember you saying you heard about it, not that Ramona specifically told you this stuff. Am I wrong? Drita's grade for the week: B.

Renee: OMG, you are exhausting in this episode! What I love about you is that you admit it. The stress of all the Junior drama and your friends pulling you in different directions is not good for you. On the Sit Down you look so much calmer and so much happier. Whatever you're doing now, keep doing it. I hate to see you blow up at anyone, but it was pretty funny that you were pissed at Ramona, then Drita, in the blink of an eye. Ramona may not have told Drita anything about Junior, but I agree with you, she probably said something to someone else and it got around. That's what happens. At the bar, you went completely off the rails and I was so relieved when the girls said what was in my head the whole time: "Why do you let it ruin your night?". Jerks are everywhere, so there's no use in losing it every time you come across one. Renee's grade for the week: D.

Carla: I felt so bad for you at that stupid cabin. I don't know how you stayed sane through all of that. It has to be hard constantly defending your friend who isn't there to defend herself. I think you're a true and loyal friend and you did your best to have a good time with these girls in spite of everything. Carla's grade for the week: A.

Karen: I like that you didn't want to discuss Drita at the cabin. If only Ramona would take your lead and not discuss her at all. I wish you both would just drop the whole Drita thing. She's trying to move forward with her life, you have this amazing new life with your book and everything, why are you holding onto this? Tell Ramona to drop it and keep it moving. Karen's grade for the week: C.

Ramona: The minute Renee mentions Drita you get fired up. When in reality, the question is, did you say something (anything) to ANYONE about Junior? Whether it was in passing or just a stupid comment, it got back to other people, not just Drita. You fixate on her so she can be your scapegoat. But it's not going to last forever. I think you need to drop the whole "I hate Drita" number and just focus on telling YOUR story. Or is hating Drita the only interesting thing about you? Ramona's grade for the week: D.

Big Ang: I wish you could have gone to the Poconos, too. Maybe they would have had more fun with you around. I honestly think you should babysit some of these girls and keep them from acting like fools with each other. Big Ang's grade for the week: A.

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No Brainer

This week, Celebrity Apprentice was a total disaster. The teams had to put together a presentation for the new Buick Verano and in my opinion, they both did a pretty good job with the task. But I have a few issues with this episode. Let's begin:

The men's team was lead my one of my favorite people, Adam Carolla. Now, being that Michael Andretti is a race car driver, you would think he would be the project manager. Guess what. He didn't want to be project manager. Fine. Michael basically passed on it because he heard the word "presentation", and decided he doesn't talk so good, so he let the tv and radio personality have a shot at it. Honestly, Adam seemed kind of full of himself and took the leadership role and ran with it. Even when his team disagreed with his "heckler" concept. However, the presentation itself wasn't bad. Adam was funny (he always is) and he knew the car inside and out. Michael stood up there and tried to put words together for a little bit, then was mercifully dismissed. Penn got into the trunk of the car!

Let's talk about the women for a bit, now. Debbie was project manager and as expected, found a way to sing in the presentation. Barf. I loved Aubrey's line about how the audience was going to hear Debbie sing whether they bought a ticket or not. Debbie's an accomplished singer, we get it. I don't know why she wants to ram it down our throats all the time. Not to say Aubrey's any better. She's a fountain of ideas and is quick on her feet, but gurl has major attitude. The women's presentation went along smoothly until the question/answer portion, where Tia couldn't answer the very first question about safety ratings. Lisa was hilarious and Teresa brought Juicy Joe and the kids to be a part of the presentation, which I thought worked well with the overall concept. Debbie's leadership was questioned in the boardroom and Tia and Teresa expressed that Debbie has a tendency to be condescending. You don't say!

Bottom line, the women won and now it was time for Adam to decide who to bring back into the boardroom. Adam said he wouldn't bring anyone back because he was project manager, and he lost the challenge. Trump was not happy, so he fired Adam and Michael, but not before beating the dead horse named "Michael Andretti is a race car driver and this was a car challenge so he should have been project manager". Here's what: Michael isn't presentation-giver! If you have a chance, listen to Adam's podcast from  Monday where he explains how over the show he was at this point and why he decided on the concept for the men's team. Seriously, he got some serious misinformation, still gave a really good presentation, lost and went home for it. But it's reality tv. No one said it would be fair.

Friday, March 9, 2012

Encyclo-Deenia

Watch What Happens Live was a lot of fun last night with my girl Deena and Wilmer Valderrama, my Venezuelan brotha! I was able to talk to Deena because I called in on Tuesday but I was on hold so long they didn't get to me till the show was over. The nice lady (love her!) said they were pre-taping Thursday's show and asked if she could call me on Wednesday evening (California time) to ask a question. Of course, I said yes and she called me on Wednesday as promised. I was on hold for over 30 minutes, so I knew I'd be on the After Show. Which is fine with me, I love getting on the show no matter what. Deena was super nice and Andy shouted out my hometown. I'm starting to wonder if he's beginning to realize it's always me when I say "Amanda from Madera, CA" because he acted like it's the first time he's heard it. Oh well, he's a busy guy. Here's the clip of me on the After Show. Let me know what you think!!! Deena says "she sounds fun!" about me. YAY! I asked which housewife would be the biggest blast in a glass and she said Jacqueline, which I LOVE!! Because it's so true!

Food Fight!

Ah, Jersey Shore is almost over and there's talk of another season. I would be happy with this being the end but if they wanna do one more, why not. I just think with all the spinoffs, there's no reason to keep the show going. Let the kids do their own thing from now on, ya know? Anywhoo, last night's episode was great, truly entertaining, if you ask me. Lots of stuff to talk about so let's get into it right now.

Food fight!

Snooki: I'm going to start with you because you have had one exciting week! You're pregnant and engaged. Mazel! I really am happy for you - and to the haters, just because Snooks acts crazy on a tv show (reality tv show at that) that tapes for a fraction of the year, it doesn't mean she's a terrible person or will be a terrible mother. Nicole Richie, anyone? Google her and see if she didn't make an awesome transition via motherhood and a stable relationship! Now, back to this week's episode. How funny was Jionni? I love this kid. He just blew Mike off without even breaking a sweat. Even if it were true, it's such old news by now. I thought it was so funny when you called Mike "Popeye". Huh-larious. I'm sure the food fight released some of the tension and now that the whole hook-up drama is over, you can just enjoy the rest of the summer. Oh and where did "bango bonjo" come from? LOL, so funny. I am worried about your friendship with Deena. We've all been through this. We're happy for our friends being in love, but we hate that they ditch us to be with their man. I think some girl time would be good for you - more specifically, Team Meatball time. Show Deena you still care and that you'll always be there for her no matter what. Congrats again, Snooks! Snooki's grade for the week: B.

JWOWW: I can listen to you say "haht dawg" awl day. LOL, accents are one of my favorite things ever, so thank you for that. I think you were such a great friend to tell off that jerk Joey for Deena, and the way you did it was great. He now knows not to mess with your girl Deena. It was so sweet that you called her your baby sister. I loved that. I can see you also have a problem with Snooki ditching you girls for Jionni, but you understand what it means to balance your time between your man and your friends. I'm sure you've already given Snooks some pointers in this area. You seem to have a very balanced relationship when it comes to having time for your girls. I was surprised that the spider on the camping trip freaked you out so much! You're the tough one! LOL I thought you would have karate chopped that spider and been done with it. JWOWW's grade for the week: B.

Sammi: Well, I had to watch the deleted scenes to catch a glimpse of the Old Sam, but there it was! LOL I will admit you were just in a bad mood, but the little tiff between you and Deena was pretty hilarious. It wasn't terrible, though. Just two girls being moody, that's all. I found it interesting that you doubted Jionni's love for Snooki because he didn't go off on Mike. But after seeing Jionni and Snooki talk about it, it's clear why he didn't - he didn't believe it and wasn't going to waste energy on it. You also said you're not sure whether Mike's telling the truth or not, which as we've seen in the After Shows, rubbed Snooki the wrong way. I'm sure that by now it's clear whether it happened or not, Mike blew it way out of proportion just for attention. I'm glad you had a good run on this season and you had fun. Will we see you and Ronnie break up before the season is over? Sammi's grade for the week: C.

Deena: Thank goodness you didn't go on that date with Joey. Let's just leave it at that. I have been in the same spot as you as far as the Snooki situation. You want your friend back, and there's nothing wrong with that. You were honest with her and even though she was defensive, you said your piece without it turning ugly. Most friendships are ruined after a conversation like that. I think your sincerity prevented it from becoming a fight. You were being real. And you know you'll always be friends with Nicole no matter what. She's just more focused on her relationship at this point. It doesn't mean you're not friends anymore. Give it some time and you'll see her come around, if she hasn't already. And now with the wedding and a baby on the way it'll just take more effort, but you two can make it work. I thought it was sweet when you said you want a relationship like Jenni and Roger, and hopefully you have that with your boyfriend now. So mazel to you, too! I'm so glad you're in love! No one deserves it more than you. Oh, and your "hermaphrodite" line was so friggin' funny! Deena's grade for the week: A.

Ronnie: I love your explanation about why you're no good at camping. You're from the Bronx! LOL! But seriously, you had some opinions on the whole Jionni/Snooki thing, as did the rest of the house, but I really don't think any of you understood that Jionni just didn't care because, let's be real - look at the source. Mike's not known for being real. He's known for being a jerk. And just because someone doesn't react the way you would in a given situation doesn't mean they're wrong. Ronnie's grade for the week: C.

Pauly: You called Jionni a not so flattering name because he didn't go after Mike. Well, see above, my friend. And I think you're wrong about Jionni hooking up with other girls. He's not a man-whore. I just don't see that in him. So, we can agree to disagree there. The fact that you called their relationship a joke was kind of mean, too. You redeemed yourself a little bit when you talked to Joey for Deena and told him she was sick. You do care about Deena! Aw! Your prank with Vin was funny and you cracked me up when you were protecting your "freshies" from the food fight (which you totally started). Pauly's grade for the week: C.

Vinny: Again, I think you're wrong about Jionni. But you don't have a lot of good things to say about the kid. You never did. Understandable. I just think you're wrong. I also think you're wrong for accusing Snooki of lying. She didn't lie to Jionni when she hooked up with you in Italy, so why lie about Mike? Snooki is a lot of things, but she's honest. Moving on, you hooked up with a thick girl because "hot girls are boring". You got a lot of heat for this on the After Show. Frankly, I really don't care who you hook up with, since they're all gross anyway. The prank with Pauly went off without a hitch and I can't wait to see what the roommates' reaction will be. Vinny's grade for the week: C.

Mike: I don't know what was more annoying. Your fit at the camping trip or that terrible accent you pulled out when talking to everyone about your conversation with Jionni. Are you ever just yourself? Or do you always have to be some character you created in your head. Jeez louise. I'm worried about your fascination with fire, though, because you really were going for the gold with that bonfire at the camp site. Get some help for that, buddy. Jionni barely reacted to you which should give you a clue that everyone is over your shtick and maybe it's time to just be yourself. Just a suggestion. Mike's grade for the week: F.

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