Thursday, April 19, 2012

Stunts and Slaps

Basketball Wives is a true reality show, through and through. They give us drama in the beginning, laughs in the middle, and drama at the end. They definitely follow a formula, and it works. This week, of course, was the slap of all slaps, courtesy of Evelyn's friend and assistant (I still don't quite understand that dynamic). It was epic. I'm still wondering how Jenn's face didn't have a hand print on it - unless I just didn't see it. You tell me.

Jenn: For a while there, you had me fooled. I was thinking Royce was right - you're nicer when you're not around Evelyn. At least you had been for the last couple of episodes. Then you had to go and ruin it by being mean and rude to Nia, and then you got smacked for it. Basically, it comes down to you thinking you're better than a certain percentage of the population. Why? Because you dress in designer clothes and shoes? Because you live in a certain kind of place? None of that actually makes you better than anyone else. And asking someone what they're doing at an event (in the tone you used), doesn't help. Saying that you won't sue them because they don't have anything doesn't help, either. I think Nia's right. We all saw the real Jenn. And we are not impressed. Jenn: F (for showing that you're not bougie, you're an elitist b*tch).

Tami: You made me laugh again this week, first, on the boardwalk with Shaunie, and then at the races when you jumped in to save Jenn from Nia and Evelyn. You are always right there! On a more serious note, I absolutely loved the scene with your mom. It's great when these reality shows actually show growth and communication and understanding. It doesn't happen often, but when it does, it's beautiful. Especially between mothers and daughters, which can be a really difficult relationship to navigate. I hope you and your mom are still close, because you're both beautiful women - inside and out. I know we all think it's funny when you tell someone off or confront someone, because it is, but it's also good to know that you are vulnerable in a lot of ways, and that you're working on becoming a better person. I appreciate you showing that to the world. Tami's grade for the week: A (yes, for making me laugh, but also for being real).

Suzie: I'm glad you saw yourself in the movie "Think Like a Man" this week. I would say that I hope you learned something from it, but I have a feeling that's not really your deal. I'm thinking you'd much rather keep making yourself look like a dumb ho. Have fun with that! Suzie's grade for the week: C (because I'm just over her in so many ways).

Royce: I like you, I think you're smart and talented and great. But why? Why? Why did we have to see you in a totally rehearsed, totally fake date night with the robe and the lingerie ... ugh. Why??? It was all so contrived, girl! You're better than stunts like that! I thought your relationship was being portrayed just fine up until that point. You jumped the shark on that one. Consider this your Tamra and Eddie in the bathtub moment (Housewives of OC). Totally unnecessary. I still like you, though. Royce's grade for the week: D (for that unnecessary stunt).

Evelyn (and Nia): You two were the dynamic duo this week, in more ways then one. At one point I thought I was watching a WWE event. Nia smacks Jenn first, now here comes her partner, Evelyn, to finish the job! Come on now, it was all kinds of ridiculous. I'm not saying it wasn't entertaining, because it was (do I really have to have the whole entertainment value vs. real life factor conversation with you all again? No? Ok, thanks), but you girls are really getting out of control. All you had to do - Evelyn - was let Nia be the aggressor and show that you're not about fighting anymore. You escort Nia out, and you laugh about it on the way home. But no, you had to jump up on the table and do some flying eagle move trying to get to Jenn. I actually agree with you that Jenn was out of line to act superior to Nia, but you didn't have to react that way. Evelyn's grade for the week: F (for not taking the opportunity to sit back and be the bigger person).

One thing I didn't address yet was the blatant commercial smack dab in the middle of the show for "Think Like a Man". Come on, VH1, we've seen the previews and we'll watch the movie if we feel like it. Damn!

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!