Saturday, September 24, 2011

How to Lose a Guy in 10 Hours

Snooki continues to be the main attraction on Jersey Shore. She single-handedly dominates this week's episode with such ease, the rest of the cast should take note. This is how you remain relevant on a reality show.

First, the accident, which turns out to be nothing more than a fender bender. Snooks and Deena are carted off to the police station only because the boys take too long to get to the scene. After all the hubbubb, Snooks is prohibited from driving in Italy and has to pay a fine and just like that, Team Meatballs is free to roam Florence again.

Snooki can now focus her attention on Jionni's upcoming visit. She tells us that she can't wait to ... spend time with him ... in the biblical sense. We get it, Snooks, you want to jump his bones, got it. Unfortunately, Jenni's boyfriend Roger can't come to Italy with Jionni as planned because he has to work. Now, Roger is older than most of the roommates, I believe Mike is the only one in the house in his age bracket, so I chalk it up to him just being a mature, hardworking guy. Jenni is crushed, but she understands that if Roger could be there, he would, but he can't. Bravo on being mature about it, Jenni!

Jionni finally arrives, and Nicole greets him at the front door in tears. It's so touching to see them actually getting along. They immediately go upstairs and argue because Jionni wants to take a shower before going to the smush room. Calm down, gurl, you have, like, 7 more hours with the kid.

In a deleted scene on, we see that Nicole and Jionni have a wonderful dinner together before they hit da club.

Now, things get interesting. Mike is paranoid and inexplicably talks about kicking Jionni in the face for no reason. Apparently, Mike is hallucinating an unspoken, totally invisible fight happening between he and Nicole's beloved. Deena gets a point for calling him "kung fu panda", good one Dee! Anywhoo, at the club Mike tells Nicole that he's ready to fight Jionni, in so many words, and she tells him to relax. Yes, Mike. Chill. Nobody cares about you anymore.

Snooki then takes Jionni onto the dancefloor and starts to dance for him. At least she thought that's what she was doing. According to him, she's just embarrassing him. She did pull her dress up and show off her underwears, as Deena would say. Jionni takes off, rather dramatically, I must say. Everyone including Snooki runs after him. I gotta say, Snooki is nothing if not determined. She was not going to take his tantrum lying down, well, except for her falling in the street.

Snooki is obviously drunk, so I really can't say I'm surprised she got crazy in da club. Jionni shouldn't be surprised either. On the hookup on mtv, the roommates make a great point: Jionni needs to understand that when he gets into a relationship with Nicole (sweet, sober, and sane), he's also getting into a relationship with Snooki (crazy, drunk, and crazy). I feel sorry for both of them, honestly. Hear me out.

Snooki is perfectly consistent. Since day one of season one, she's been the same girl. Yes, the clothes and the hair have changed, but the craziness and silliness has always remained. This is why we love her. Now, maybe we haven't seen the fighting side as much as we do this season, but it's not surprising. Snooki has always stood up for herself, and maybe she's under more pressure or stress this time around because she actually loves this kid and there's a lot of chips stacked against this relationship right now. Back to the episode at hand.

Snooki is not in her right mind, and she's lashing out at everyone because she can't lash out at Jionni since he won't stop running away from her. She's been waiting for this visit for weeks, and in a matter of hours, it's ruined. I think she knows exactly what went wrong, and maybe she feels guilty for it, but she can't express that right now. All she can do is cry, scream, sob, and teeter down the cobblestone streets and hit taxis with her purse. She even yells at Jenni, who is stepping up big time and searching for Jionni with Snooks and Ronnie. Ron actually catches up to Jionni, who basically says he's done and he's ok with it.

I honestly thought Jenni handled Snooki the best way she could. It has to be frustrating dealing with someone who is so intoxicated. Sammi and Deena finally get Snooki into a cab to go home. Jionni is hanging out by some random fountain, presumably thinking, "My passport is at my now-ex-girlfriend's house." He comes to the house and walks right by Snooki, which infuriates her. They have a somewhat brief exchange consisting of her asking him why he's doing this to her and him recounting her less than lady-like acts at da club. Snooki denies the whole thing, even though Jionni was right there and saw her flash everyone her undies. But let's be fair, at least she was wearing undies.

Jionni tells Snooki they're done and to leave him alone. She goes to bed, crying. This is so sad. Unlike Sam and Ron's fights, I actually feel sympathetic towards these two. Again, let me explain. Jionni seems like a pretty nice guy, until he's made to feel embarrassed or exposed in any way. He projects that onto Snooki and constantly berates her for embarrassing him. I have no doubt that they love each other, but they may not be compatible, at least not right now. He needs to get over his insecurities and quit worrying about what other people think if he's going to be with Nicole/Snooki. If he can't, then he's with the wrong girl(s).

One of the best scenes is when Jionni and Snooki are fighting and Sammi finally gets how uncomfortable it is to have a fighting couple in the house, and apologizes. Lightbulb moment!

While Nicole is in bed crying, Jionni gets his bag and leaves. Snooki runs after him but she's too late, the taxi is long gone. Next week, we'll see the aftermath of the Snooki/Jionni breakup, including Mike's latest attempt at professing his love (?) for Snooks.

What did you think of this episode. Let me know by tweeting me at my twitter page.