Thursday, November 15, 2012

RHOA Season 5 Episode 2 - Mock Up

I'm back, kids! I hope you all had a great Veterans' Day weekend. Mine was pretty awesome, which explains how behind I am on blogging. I just want to thank you all for your patience with me. I'll try to stay on top of it from now on, but you know me, when I have a chance to get some time off, I usually go berserk and forget about everything else. Not an excuse, I know. But still. Anyway, I'm so glad I watched RHOA, because I have a question that need to be answered.

Why are we wasting so much time on Kenya? She isn't likable, she isn't interesting, and she isn't fun. At all. Maybe Bravo thinks they need to give us so much backstory on her because she causes major drama this season, but I'm here to tell you - ya don't. We're good. I was full on fed up with Kenya last week. I don't need to see her for almost half of the episode. Unnecessary, Bravo.

So why don't we give out some grades? This is gonna be fun.

Kenya: Like I said before, you're coming across as messy and unstable. Your scene with Walter was cringe-worthy at best. You had no reason (except insecurity) to get so pressed about Walter asking Kandi out on a date. I'm pretty sure he's dated a lot of women, and he was just trying to be honest with you like you asked him to. I also have to address the lies you told at your lunch with Kandi and Phaedra. You were not invited by Jet, you were invited by Cynthia, and your bodyguard didn't throw anyone out of anywhere. What world are you living in? I think you may be the most immature 41 year old in Housewives history (and that's saying a lot). Why would you mock Cynthia's speech at her party? Was it because she wasn't praising you? It seems to me that the only time you're happy is when it's all about you. How sad. Then you have the nerve to take the microphone and call it a clown show? You are the clown, honey. Are you not the least bit self aware? The only scene that made me not hate you was the scene with your aunt. Now, I like her. In that scene, you seemed real. You were open and honest. You weren't putting anyone else down. Why can't you be that girl with the rest of the cast? It makes me think you're faking the attitude and putting on an act so that you'll have more camera time. And I don't like that. Especially when you make it so painfully obvious. Round 2 with Cynthia was hilarious, because you are so eager to make sure Nene likes you, but two minutes before you were making fun of the entire event? Fake, fake, fake. Kenya's grade for the week: F (because she's acting like a nutbag).

Nene: I like that you're so calm and peaceful this season. Success agrees with you. I think the standout moment of this episode for you was when you were friendly and engaging with Kim and Sweetie and they clearly had no idea what to do. True, you've fought with cast members in the past, but I can see a change in you. In fact, last season, when you were in Africa, you were the peace maker. So, it isn't really new. You've been in the process of changing for a while, now. So, I think it's great that you are being so positive and uplifting this season. You were great with Phaedra and you were more than nice to Kim. I give you credit for that. You're not bringing up old sh*t - you're on to bigger and better things. The idea to make the party about all successful women was a great idea. And you look great this season, by the way. You handled Kenya well and I can't wait to see how you deal with the rest of the ladies now that you're in a much better place personally and professionally. Nene's grade for the week: A (because she's being super positive and I love it - and if it's all an act, may she win an Oscar!).

Kim: You continue to shock me with your foul language and behavior. Here's a thought. If you really don't want to go to an event, DON'T GO! You're not doing anyone any favors by showing up, having stank look on your face, and sneaking out early. Who does that? And Sweetie, you're a mess. How can you say that the event was boring when you weren't talking to anyone and you were glued to your phone? Come on. Back to Kim, I'm real happy for you that you got your bracelet from your wedding for your birthday. That was nice. But if I have to hear you say "We're homeless" one more time, I'm going to rip my eardrums out. It's always a complaint with you. Why can't you just be grateful for what you have? You have a townhouse. Great. You're going to look for a bigger home. Great. Why do we have to hear all this bullsh*t? When are you quitting the show again? Kim's grade for the week: F (because I'm over her and all her whining).

Kandi: I really like you, but you're gonna have to answer for a few things. Why would you laugh and entertain Kenya's insults about Cynthia at lunch? I thought you and Cynthia were cool? Did I miss something? Also, you laughed when Kenya was mocking Cynthia at the party, as well. I just didn't think you would play along with something like that. You usually speak up and defend your friends. So, I'm not sure what was going on there. Maybe you were just laughing to avoid getting Kenya on your bad side. But really, do you want to be friends with such a loose cannon? Well, you were friends with Kim - see where that got you? Maybe you're just too nice. You need to have some higher standards when it comes to picking friends. That's all I'm saying. I do like your friendship with Phaedra. You two are a much better fit when it comes to your personalities. I really like Todd, too. And Riley is so pretty! She's becoming such a beautiful young lady. Kandi's grade for the week: C (because I can't get behind her laughing with Kenya at everyone else's expense - I need to know where Kandi stands when it comes to Cynthia).

Cynthia: I am still on your side. You threw a great event in Nene's honor, and Kenya disrespected you, again. Who gave her the microphone? You have always been very supportive of Nene (some would say to a fault, but not me) and you've always praised her publicly. I don't know why that's so funny to Kenya. I think it's great for one woman to show another how much she respects her. When Kenya was trying to make sure Nene would give her a chance, you should have let them just finish their conversation. It was a little rude of you to jump in, but I understand why you did it. This was after Kenya disrespected you for the second time. So, in your mind, it could have been go time. At any rate, I loved the shade about when she won her crown. It's true! Before this show, I had no idea this girl even existed! And if she's going to dish it out, she better be able to take it. You keep saying it like you mean it, Cynthia, but I will say - be prepared for whatever Kenya the wackjob is going to do and say. And you're right. Her ugliness on the inside makes her ugly on the outside. You win! Cynthia's grade for the week: B (because she's still standing up for herself, but she should have stayed out of Nene and Kenya's conversation at the party - just to show she is the bigger person).

Phaedra: The scene with you, Nene, and Cynthia working out was hilarious! I think it's great that you can put the past behind you and have a good time with Nene. And I was so happy to see you laugh about "Fakedra"! This is what we love about you. You can take all of this with a grain of salt because this show isn't your whole world. You may want to teach Kenya a little about that. I really have no beef with you, other than what I already said to Kandi. You shouldn't be egging Kenya on when she makes fun of Cynthia (or anyone else for that matter). I'm wondering if she thinks it's ok because you and Kandi are laughing with her? Is that really the message you want to send? Especially now that you are getting along with everyone? I would nip this Kenya thing in the bud now. She's out of control and you don't want to support that. Phaedra's grade for the week: C (because I love how she's getting along with everyone but she needs to stop playing like she condones what Kenya is doing).

You may be hating that I'm Team Cynthia, but really - when you look at Kenya's behavior, how can you not be? Kenya has made herself look like a crazy person. She's done it to herself and I'm just calling it like I see it.

What do you think of this episode? Tweet me!