Thursday, November 17, 2011

Impromptu Intervention

So much went down on the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills this week, it's ridiculous! But I will try to focus on the most juiciest tidbits for you.

Kim practically forces Kyle to meet her boyfriend of a year, Ken. That's a lotta K's, no? Are they pulling a Kardashian on us? Anyway, Ken seems perfectly nice until Kyle spots the wedding band on his wedding finger. He says it's a sort of promise ring from Kim. Interesting. Especially considering he's still on match.com according to recent reports, and it's also been reported that he got a DUI in 2009. This guy just keeps the hits coming. Kim says this is the first time she's doing what she wants to do, which I kind of believe. Really, I just feel sorry for the lady and want her to be happy. But that seems to be quite a challenge for Kim, which makes me sad. Kyle is concerned, and rightfully so. I don't know of anyone who wouldn't be a little upset if they were in Kyle's spot with Kim. Kyle has her suspicions, and she makes no secret about the fact that she is a little overbearing when it comes to Kim, so let's let this one play out and we'll see who's right and who's wrong. All I have to say is, Ken better be on his best behavior. I wouldn't want the Pointer Sisters to come back out to play (Kyle and Kim a la Game Night).

Adrienne and Paul go out for a swanky dinner for Paul's birthday. Paul is kind of annoying, especially when he repeats that Adrienne should order the crab 15 times in a row. OMG! No wonder Adrienne was shooting daggers. I think Paul and Adrienne love each other but they push each other's buttons. They have a discussion about Taylor, and Adrienne says she's concerned for her, although she's never actually seen Russell physically abuse Taylor. All she knows is what Taylor says. The waiter brings out a birthday cake-lette with a sparkler (just like the one on Housewives of Atlanta on Sunday) and Adrienne immediately protects her hair (just like the Housewives of Atlanta). See? We're all the same at the end of the day.

Kyle and Mauricio talk about Kim's boyfriend at length, and I think what Kyle is really upset about is the fact that Kim isn't doing EXACTLY what Kyle wants her to do. Kyle has a very specific idea in her head about what Kim should be doing and Kim is essentially doing the opposite. Mauricio hits it on the head when he tells Kyle that it's Kim's life - so true. Oh and I am still in love with Mauricio.

Taylor is nominated for a Women in Business Award, and Russell is at the event. It's still so unsettling to see him on the show. It's unsettling to hear everyone talk about him, but even more so to see him interact with Taylor and others on the show. Camille, Adrienne, and Dana are there to support Taylor. Kyle is on her way, and gets a call from Lisa. Obviously rushing to get to the event, Kyle blurts out that she's at the hotel and looking for the girls - thinking Lisa is with them. Lisa is not. It finally dawns on Kyle that Lisa wasn't invited, so the conversation is now officially awkward. Lisa invites Kyle to a tea party at her house the next day, and ends the phone call like nothing is wrong. I love Lisa for taking the high road on this one. I know I would have gone off and probably taken it out on the person on the phone. But Lisa knows this isn't Kyle's fault. Kyle finds the rest of the ladies and sheepishly tells them about the phone call with Lisa. Dana pipes up, "Taylor's gonna kill you." Um, seriously, Dana, nobody cares what you have to say. Just be happy you were invited this time around and sit down. Kyle makes sure to let Taylor know that she basically spilled the beans without meaning to, and I'm surprised at how Taylor reacts. She says she would've found out anyway, and the fact is, Taylor doesn't even like Lisa. So she's not worried about hurting her feelings at this point. Taylor ends up not winning the award after all, but she's happy just to be nominated. Lisa tells Ken about her conversation with Kyle, and the fact that she wasn't invited. She says it's weird because everyone is usually included in these type of events. She feels singled out and hurt, and I understand that, but I have to say I would be kind of relieved to not have to be around Taylor once in a while. That's just me. Taylor keeps saying it was her day and Lisa would have ruined it, since you know, Lisa is so judgmental. Dana tells Taylor she did the right thing. Again, Dana, just don't. I loved it when Lisa held up Giggy and said, "We can play games, too!" That's right! It's tit for tat, honey, and I'll put my money on Lisa any day.

The next day, Lisa's tea party is about to start. Lisa says in her interview that she invited Taylor because she's not into petty bullshit. At least one of these ladies isn't! Can I just say how much I love Giggy's bedazzled stroller? It's what I wish I was pushed around in as a child. Camille, Adrienne, and Kyle arrive at Lisa's and they chat about Camille's situation with Kelsey for a moment. Camille is so much easier to watch this season - like I said in a previous blog - getting away from Frasier was the best thing she's ever done. She's pretty much great now. Lisa tells the girls she got another email from Russell, and it turns out it must have been a mass email, because the rest of them got it too. It looks like an ad for diet pills with Taylor as the spokesperson. Wow, can we say "in poor taste"? This girl is walking around looking like Geoff from the Craig Ferguson show, and she's hawking diet pills? Oy. Taylor comes in and Kyle changes the subject to Kim, who's not there. Lisa calls Kim to see if she's coming, and of course, she's not. But I'm glad, because we get to hear Lisa's dead-on impression of Kim again. I can't get enough!! Lisa wastes no time confronting Taylor for not inviting her to the award event, and Taylor flips the eff out. I mean, crying, accusing, the whole nine. Taylor can't let go of the whole "friends" thing and asks Lisa why she told people she doesn't have friends. I feel like I'm back in high school at this point. Taylor whines that she kissed Lisa's ass to make her like her and it didn't work. Lisa just looks at Taylor blankly and says, "I don't know what you're talking about." Of course you don't, Lisa, because she's not making any bloody sense - and the diet pills probably aren't helping. Taylor then utters the now famous words, "If you can't be my friend, please don't be my enemy", then says she'll never be good enough for Lisa, and storms out. This is now officially all Taylor's problem. Who knew she was fabricating this whole inferiority complex in her head?

The girls stop Taylor from leaving, and Round 2 begins. Taylor spouts off how she can't live like this, she's imperfect, and has all this anxiety because Lisa is judging her. I'm sorry, but Lisa's been the only one who's told Taylor like it is and hasn't sugar coated it for her. Is that judging? Or being real? Lisa tells Taylor she just wanted to help her but she may have been wrong for her choice of words - saying that they've never been best friends - and she apologizes, which I think was the best move she could have made. Taylor seems to not have heard the apology because she just keeps hammering Lisa, saying her comments are hurtful and that she's struggling with her self esteem issues. Taylor then says, "I don't know who I am." This is just painful to watch. Taylor turns it on Lisa again saying, "You make me feel bad about myself." This is just ridiculous. Even if Lisa's words were taken out of context, all she said was that she wasn't PRETENDING that they were the best of friends, but she would be there for her anyway. How is that judging? Even if you factor in Lisa telling Taylor to eat - that's not a terrible thing either! But in Taylor's mind, I think Lisa represents everyone that isn't falling for her bullshit and that's what's pissing her off. Taylor then calls on the rest of the group to back her up and tell Lisa what they really think of her - and in the process, throws Kyle under the bus regarding her comment about Lisa's ego. Kyle steps up and admits she did say that Lisa has a big ego. Lisa looks like someone just punched her in the stomach. Taylor almost joyfully brings up the fact that Lisa's screensaver is a picture of herself and Giggy, like she's the only person who has herself as her screensaver. Hey, Taylor, my screensaver is my picture of me and Kathy Griffin, so suck it. Taylor calls Lisa obnoxious and self involved, and at that point Lisa is done - this is just "too bitchy" for her, she maintains that she's never said anything negative about anyone but Taylor. Taylor gets up and leaves again, saying she's the only one being honest and none of the girls will back her up. She goes outside and Paul is at the gate so she tells him the story - from her point of view of course - and makes herself the victim once again.

Back inside the house, Kyle tells Lisa she's in the middle because she wants to be there for both Lisa and Taylor. Lisa makes the point that they've been focusing on all this "friend" stuff when Taylor's real issue is her marriage. Exactly! Camille points out that Taylor will complain about her marriage, make it sound like she's leaving him, and then a couple of hours later, say everything is fine. So there are definitely mixed messages coming directly from Taylor. Kyle says she can't judge because she hasn't seen it happen, but maybe Taylor has exaggerated things. Adrienne thinks Taylor doesn't have the willpower to actually leave Russell. Taylor is still outside bitching to Paul, who looks terribly bewildered. Taylor says "the Giggy is up" about Lisa's mean-girl ways. Then, inexplicably, they start talking about Taylor's fillers??? I'm not kidding!

Taylor comes back into the house and Camille stages an impromptu intervention. Taylor is confused and asks Kyle why she's bringing her marriage up. Did anyone else notice how thin Taylor's hair looks? Ay ay ay. Taylor starts to get defensive and Kyle has had enough. "Don't f*** with me like that", Kyle says, and that sends Taylor into another tailspin about how the girls won't back her up against Lisa. Taylor asks Lisa to be honest and to not talk about her to other people. Lisa calmly asks that Taylor do the same. Camille then jumps in and gives Taylor a reality check: all of the girls have protected her because they DON'T say that her husband hits her and allegedly broke her jaw, but now they're saying it.

Next week, Taylor reacts (poorly) to the intervention, and there's a ho-down with a bunch of hateration flying around.

For some reason, my DVR didn't record Watch What Happens Live, but I watched clips and the After Show (here), and it looks like it was a fun show with Adrienne Maloof and China Chow from Work of Art. I don't watch that show, but China is very charming! I loved her Black Swan-ish ensemble. Oh and Marilyn Manson called in and mumbled some nonsense. It was kind of uncomfortable, but who says the clubhouse is always comfortable? Adrienne really doesn't like to say anything negative so she was put on the spot quite a bit, which is pretty hilarious.

What did you think of this episode? Tweet me!