Monday, August 20, 2012

Un-f*cking-necessary

Ok, so I just finished watching last night's Real Housewives of New Jersey episode, and I'm pretty much livid. With one Joe Giudice. Here's the thing. We get that you're "rough around the edges", we even get that you say some inappropriate things and get drunk and chip your tooth while doing gymnastics in the living room. You're an odd duck! We get it. But you were either so drunk, or so careless (I don't know which is worse) that you took that call WHILE WEARING A MICROPHONE AND WHILE BEING FILMED. You're an idiot. You're rude, insensitive, selfish, and mean. You're miserable and you use alcohol and insults to cover it up. Well, the cat's out of the bag. It's officially out there. And I never want to see you on my television ever again. Now, let's address the ladies.

Caroline: I was really happy for you when the kids were toasting you for your birthday. That was really sweet and it was a very nice surprise dinner. Any mom would love that kind of celebration. I wasn't too crazy about how you kept harping on the whole Teresa thing with Kathy and Jacqueline. The bottom line is: Teresa was on the trip and everyone was dealing with her in their own way. Like Chris said, you choose not to have anything to do with her. Fine. It's time to stop talking about it. But, of course, you don't stop and next week we get to see round 2 between you and Teresa. Not that I'm looking forward to it. Also, the Giudices, Wakiles, and Gorgas should have never been at the business meeting in the first place. It was Chris' mistake to ask them to come. If it was really a business meeting, then it should have been only for those who were involved in the business part of the trip. To be honest, Caroline, I think you're done on this show. Think about it. You can't get past this hatred you have for Teresa, and for the record, you are completely free to hate her, it's your business. But this show is never going to get out of this dysfunctional cycle because there is just too much animosity between you and Teresa. And it sucks. It pulls the whole show down. For example, Teresa's toast. It's ok to be upset about it for Kathy's sake, but you were overly outraged about it. It's almost as if you take any excuse to be mad at Teresa and just run with it, even if it has nothing to do with you. It's frustrating because I think there's a lot of great sides to you. But all we're seeing now is the side that hates Teresa. And that's a drag. I've said it before. This show isn't for you anymore. Caroline's grade for the week: D (because she's allowing her feelings toward Teresa turn her into something we don't like).

Jacqueline: We didn't hear much from you on this episode, so I'll keep it brief. I must say, you really thought you were getting back to a good place with Teresa. It sucks to know exactly how your friendship with her actually ends up. Damn Bravo for filming so soon and airing the season so late. I'll never forgive them for this jacked up season. I liked seeing you laugh and have fun, and if you do come back next season, that's exactly what I want to see from you. The scene where you were doing Teresa's hair felt like we were back in season one. Jacqueline's grade for this week: A (because at this point, she was doing her part and keeping things in a good place).

Kathy: You know I love you, but when it comes to Teresa - you cannot take her seriously. In this case, I agree with Richie, what comes out of her mouth most of the time is complete nonsense. I really don't think she meant to leave you out of the toast intentionally, to be honest. I think she just wanted to acknowledge a few people at the table. It would have been different if she said something about every single person and then decided to not say anything about you. Would it have been nice if she had said something nice to you in her toast? Absolutely! But that's giving Teresa way too much credit. We all know Teresa is all about Teresa. And what was in her head at that moment was exactly what she said. End of story. I really don't think there was any malice behind it. I will say, you handled it well. You didn't throw a fit, you didn't turn and scream at her, you just went on about your business. Which is the best way to handle Teresa. Because you know if you would have started a fight, she wouldn't have listened to a word you said. So, you're smart to be the bigger person. However, like I said before, I don't think she did it on purpose. But it hurt your feelings and you have a right to feel how you feel. Now, next week, I hope you don't let her put her hands on you ... you better stand up for yourself and let her know where she can go. Kathy's grade for the week: C (for keeping calm at the table but she should not have let Teresa's toast get to her).

Melissa: You were shady this week! You were throwing shade left and right! And I enjoyed it, to be quite honest. It made me laugh, sue me. I could tell you were joking about the sex tape thing, but I can see how comments like that don't win you any points with Teresa. Granted, you were absolutely right about her giving interviews in magazines and then being shocked when people ask her about her personal life. But the sex tape/fame whore comment was a low blow (no pun intended). Teresa's definitely hustling to make money and capitalizing on her small degree of fame, but what you said wasn't cool. Joke or no joke. And let's be real, no one wants to see that. Ever. Melissa's grade for the week: C (for the excellent shade, but she went too far with some of her comments).

Teresa: First of all, I'm so sorry you have to see your husband's phone conversation on this week's episode, I can't imagine how devastating that was to watch. His comments about you were completely unnecessary and out of line. I can't believe he would speak about you that way to anyone. I truly feel for you right now. And what makes it even worse for me is that you tried to seduce him in the vineyards after that and he called you a whore. To your face. I don't know how that's supposed to be ok, because it's not. I hate the way he talks to you. I can see you trying to force him into being happy - you're asking him to smile for the picture, telling him to make love in the vineyard, etc. He's not happy, Tre. He's miserable. And you don't have to take it. In your blog this week, you seemed really sincere (it actually sounded like you), and you say that you didn't know about the phone conversation until you saw the episode. You also say Joe has apologized. But, he didn't tell you about it - you had to watch the show to find out. You know what Joe is sorry about? He's sorry he got caught. He's sorry he forgot he had a mic on when he called you a bitch and that other disgusting name and he's sorry you found out about it. Worse, he's sorry you heard him obviously talking to another woman and he's sorry you saw him lie to your face about it. Teresa - you know I'm not your biggest fan, but as a woman, I am begging you. Get out. Immediately. You don't need this bullsh*t. And I've told you in this blog more times than I can remember that Joe Giudice is the biggest problem in your life. He is the poison in your life right now. You can obviously get along with people and forgive and forget. Look at the progress you made with Melissa. Now, it's time to stand up and walk away. That's how I see it. As for the toast, I don't think you meant to leave Kathy out. Like I told her, I think you were focused on certain people at the table and that was the extent of it. I do think you're selfish and I do think you're all about yourself. And truthfully, that's not even always a bad thing. The problem is, you're on the defense with Kathy (and still bringing up the recipe bullsh*t) and you're on the defense with Caroline. It's time to stop fighting, Teresa. And the first step is getting away from the person who encourages you to fight with everyone. Have you ever stopped to think that maybe the reason Joe encourages you to fight with people is so that then you'll be too distracted to catch him doing his dirt? Just saying. Teresa's grade for the week: N/A (because at this point, I feel like Teresa is drowning and just trying to stay above water - in an ocean full of negativity called Joe Giudice).

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