Monday, June 11, 2012


This week's Real Housewives of New Jersey was basically a diagram of opposites. Beautiful wedding vs. selling stories to magazines for money. Love and happiness vs. looking like you want to tear someone's throat out. I'm not going to lie. Travelling with people you don't like sucks. Hard. I know first hand. But, sometimes you do have to just grit your teeth and get through the whole thing, especially if a celebration is taking place. The wedding was gorgeous and very emotional - and I liked that everyone was truly happy for Jaime and Rich. I love that we had that moment of all-around positivity, however brief. Oh, and Joe Gorga's impression of Joe Giudice made me laugh out loud!

But the show isn't all love and light (shout out to Danielle Staub - remember her?), so let's get into the cattiness, bitchiness, and sheer ridiculosity of this episode.

Teresa: I'm going make this short. I think it's wrong that you let a magazine write whatever they want around an interview with you and in essence, let the magazine misrepresent you in exchange for money. I think it's wrong that you won't even consider the idea of therapy. I think it's not such a great idea to listen to Joe Giudice about not going to therapy - because he probably knows that if you do go to therapy, you'll become a much more self-aware person and maybe not put up with as much bullsh*t from him. Just saying. I also think it was in poor taste to announce your book being on the best seller's list and then thank a bunch of people that you said some not so great things about in the book for their "support". I'll reserve the rest of my thoughts until I see your complete meltdown next week. And it's not going to be nice. So, get ready. Teresa's grade for the week: N/A (no grade needed because I want to wait until next week so I can really let loose).

Caroline: When people criticize you for being holier-than-thou and superior, I see where they're coming from. Let's be real. You looked like you wanted to jump out of that bus anytime Teresa and Joe Giudice spoke. Not that I blame you. But, I think you could definitely not let people get under your skin as much. If I were you, I would have paid for a separate car to take to the wedding. And who cares what anyone would have thought of it? You're the groom's sister and you want to take your own car, so what?! And by the way, where was Al? I though it was odd that your husband wasn't at the wedding. Did I miss something? Anyway, I think you gave way too much thought and energy to the tabloid article that came out about Teresa that day. At this point, you shouldn't even read them or be surprised by them. You know what it is. Your speech was very nice, but I would have picked something completely different for you to wear. Not that it matters. I'm just saying. The previews for next week are crazy, and I'm not sure how I feel about you crashing Jacqueline and Teresa's conversation. We'll see how that plays out. Caroline's grade for the week: D+ (because I liked her speech but she was WAY too grumpy for my taste).

Melissa: I didn't think you said anything out of line this week. You've been surprisingly calm throughout this whole Teresa-tabloid-mess. I say you're smart to play it cool. Others see it differently, but we can all agree to disagree. I don't know anything about you all except what I see on the show and what I occasionally read online, and I base my opinions on that. On the show, you're alright with me. I don't know if I like the new song, but I'm willing to listen to the finished product and give it a whirl. Melissa's grade this week: B (for not blowing up about the article and playing it cool).

Jacqueline: The fence is getting narrower and narrower and next week, we'll finally see you jump off of it. I've been waiting all season for this. Not that I'm happy about your friendship with Teresa ending, but it really is the turning point and it'll answer a lot of our questions. In this episode, you're still teetering on top of the fence. I think you're right to question Teresa's character. She's told you she gets money for being on the magazines, and she's told you she doesn't want to go to therapy - two things that are directly related to the problem not getting resolved. Then she tells you she doesn't hold grudges (which we all know she does). All of it is like white noise now. And I don't blame you for being frustrated. I thought you tried to help her see that therapy is a viable solution to her problem, which she promptly dismissed. If I were you, that would have been my breaking point. I would have had Buddha as my witness that I was done talking about this and that I couldn't take this bullsh*t anymore. I think we all need to watch what happens next week to see the actual fault lines open up between you and Teresa once and for all. Other than that, I thought you were on that fence long enough, and it's about time you picked a side. It really didn't matter to me which one you chose. I was just tired of seeing you trying to please everyone, meanwhile, you're completely exhausted. Jacqueline's grade for the week: C- (because she was still trying to get through to Teresa while having all of these doubts, and it's time to just put her cards on the table).

Kathy: You were having a blast at that pool party! I love seeing all of you have a good time. And Rosie was hilarious, as always. I can see how hurt you are about the articles, and how much you wish things were different. But we can all see that you are capable of honest communication. I love that Richie was helping Joe Gorga reach out to Teresa again. That was great. I really don't think anyone can knock you or Richie this season. You've done a lot to try to help the situation, but those tabloids are just making things worse. And you're right, those articles are trash. Now, I totally understand why you don't actively seek Teresa out because every time you do, it's a problem. And you don't need that kind of aggravation. Kathy's grade for the week: A (because what she said about the articles is absolutely 100% right on).

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